Helping wife through surgery??
My wife is scheduled for Gastric Sleeve on March 13th. She's fairly healthy overall, just overweight with BMI or 44. She was found to be deficient in B1 (although she's NOT an alcoholic) and vitamin D, but takes pills to correct that. She's tried to lose weight through normal methods but has not been very successful. She eats less than I do (I'm 5'11", 165lbs and eat as much as I can stuff into my face) but hasn't seen much results. She's been overweight all her life.
Anyways, the surgeon cleared her for surgery but today she met with the anesthesiologist who said she wasn't cleared for surgery because her heart rate was too high. She's been dealing with A LOT of stress lately, mostly from her job. Her boss acts supportive but really just doesn't understand. Anyhow, they're going to re-test her on Tuesday. I'm sure she'll be fine but right now she's flipping out which obviously just adds more stress.
She really wants the surgery because she feels like its the only thing that will help her lose the weight. I want her to be healthy, and happy so I'm in support of whatever route she chooses for that. Seems her only concern about it is if she's approved for surgery or not. Also she's worried perhaps too much about if she'll die on the table. Which I've tried to help her through that but I think that might be something she'll just have to get over with herself.
What can I do to make sure that this whole process is as smooth as possible, has a fast recovery, and also that she sees the results she's looking for? I've already scheduled a week off of work. And she's going to take 2-4 weeks off work. I want to do as much as I can to help her and motivate her.
I've never had gastric surgery, but I had my appendix removed. It wasn't fun at all.
Thanks!
Shawn
Hello Shawn, Just let your wife know that she needs to wait until they have all of her vitals, etc. under control, as she really doesn't want them to perform surgery if she is not 100% physically ready. Also explain to her that she is not going to die on the table. (That is why they are not going to do the surgery until she is ready!) They have come a long way with this surgery and have been doing it for a while now, so she shouldn't worry. All surgerys have risks and they have to tell you that. You said she is fairly healthy and that makes it so much easier! She just needs to settle down a little bit and let the process happen the way it needs to. The hospital stay goes by very quickly! I was more concerned about my recovery and doing what I was supposed to do in the weeks after my surgery. (I had mine 3-1/2 months ago. (My husband didn't take off work, but he helped out where he could.) Tell her to ignore her boss, it is his problem that he doesn't get it. If he doesn't want to lose her, he will have to get over it. Otherwise, she doesn't want to work for someone like that anyway and should find another job when she gets healthy. (And when she gets health she may feel so good, that she may want to find something else anyway!) You being off the week after surgery will be a tremendous help to her. Alot of people do not have the support that she has, so she is already ahead of the game. Nerveells are normal, but she needs to not focus on surgery 24/7 and become obsessed about it. Just let every phase progress the way it should. I have already lost 50 pounds since November. I also no longer take blood pressure or cholesterol medications. This surgery is a gift that keeps on giving! Tell her to look at it as a gift to herself. Also let her know she is very lucky to have such a caring husband! If you have any questions before, during or after, just post on this site and someone will get back to you. (If you don't receive a response right away, just go to the search (it looks like a magnifying glass in the upper right corner of this page) and plug in the subject of your questions. Chances are someone has asked it before. (And most cases, plenty of people have asked the same questions). Take care and good luck! She will be just fine!
