Weight loss isn't a magic cure all

Pamela M.
on 10/9/14 11:17 am - Atlanta, GA
VSG on 08/25/14

Stacy, whoever posted "maybe there's something about your personality you could change" . . . girl RUN RUN RUN from people who think like that!  You are perfect just the way you are. Love every little quirky thing about you, In fact, celebrate them!  Don't lose courage.  Hell, you can have my husband if you want him. LOL. There's a lot of married people who are very lonely!  Most days I fall into that category!  Focus on loving yourself. Thanks for your honesty and know that we are on your side!

       

The price of anything is the amount of life you exchange for it.   Henry David Thoreau

luvmypuggies
on 10/9/14 2:40 am

Oh Stacy, my heart goes out to you - it's not easy is it?  You sound like such a vibrant, smart, sassy woman that I'm sure you'll meet the perfect guy eventually.  One tidbit that I read years ago that really sunk in with me is that relationships have to be "a match" on both sides. Sometimes you don't really know why you don't click with someone but you don't - there's nothing wrong with the other person but it's just not a match. Put your energy into things that you love doing; sometimes when you stop trying too hard, things work out better - you know, the "watched pot" deal... :)   Hang in there!  it's a journey with ups and downs, just like the weight loss.

gmantek
on 10/9/14 2:48 am

Stacy I remember being in a similar place that you are now at exactly 32 years old!!  This probably isn't what you want to hear, but here goes: You cannot look for Mr. Right - I truly believe you will find him when you least expect it.  Could be tomorrow or a year from now, or longer.  But I believe from the bottom of my heart you will find him when it's right.  I will say that it can't hurt to take advantage of places like church, singles activity groups, use your friends for introductions, etc.  I met my husband at 32 and we were engaged in 6 months.  I've been married for 10 years now.  I guess my point is that no need to stress and worry about matters of the heart, because it's something that's out of our control in most ways.  When the time is right you will meet Mr. Right!  Until then, have some fun and enjoy being in the skin you love! 

Mrs_Desire _
on 10/9/14 3:15 am - Houston, TX
VSG on 11/18/13

Let me tell you girl.... It is going to happen when you right at the edge of completely giving up OR when you least expect it. I KNOW!!!!

I had my profile on a dating site. Went on SEVERAL dates. Met SEVERAL nice men but they DIDN'T LIKE ME for one reason or another. Not fat enough, too fat, too smart... too independent... not independent enough. And then there were the BUSTERS... Ugh!!!!

Then one day out the blue on a April 2014 WEEKDAY, my now fiance sent me a message and here I am about to get MARRIED!!! I am still in awe at the fact that I am actually getting freaking married. My match... My partner... We complete each others sentences... He knows what I am thinking before I say anything... He SPOILS ME!!! Tells me DAILY that he loves ME.

The one for YOU will come lady. I use to think I would be old and lonely... having a parrot and some fish. I had officially said FREAK getting involved with a man. I am DONE. Get me some pets that will love me. 

Myfitnesspal: MsDesire​  - Revision from Realize Band Patient

Height: 5'10" HW: 305  SW: 298 Surg Goal: 195 Endo Goal: 165 

 

    

    

Stacy_WLS
on 10/9/14 3:31 am

Haha -- just the last couple of days, I've been like I need a dog -- wait I'm not sure I have enough time for a dog, maybe I should start with a cat.  They will love me.  :)

VSG: 12/12/13, LBL, small TL, BL/BA: 11/7/14 Twins 12/9/18 HW after Twins 260. 5'10 37 years old - Stacy_WLS (MFP)

Yogalady
on 10/9/14 10:51 pm

Love yourself! You have major accomplishments under your belt and great life ahead of you let it happen.

Colleen O.
on 10/9/14 4:12 am
VSG on 04/09/14

This is exactly what happened to me, too!  I thought I'd be alone forever.  I started planning my life alone.  Now, I'm planning a wedding!  It's crazy to think about but when it happens it feels so right.  Congrats to you!!  :-)

  

HW: 387 (12/13)  ConsultW: 383 (12/13)  SW: 321 (4/9/14)  CW: 234.6 (10/19/14)

Happy Gurl
on 10/9/14 7:56 am
VSG on 10/26/12

Ditto!!!  I have a loving doggie, lots of friends to travel with, hobbies...was perfectly happy planning my life alone, since most of the men I had meet were quite frankly not worth the trouble.  Then bamn, met my fiancé who treats me like gold, took care of me after two rounds of plastics after only dating a few months - even though he said I didn't need it of course.  So go out and enjoy being active, find some hobbies, maybe do some traveling and enjoy your life.  One day you'll meet someone special.

HW: 390, HbandW: 340, LbandW:237,

HsleeveW: on 10/27/12:270, CW: 167:) GW: 175 :))))

M1:22, M2:16, M3:10, M4:9, M5:8, M6: 9, M7: 8, M8: 6, M9: 3, M10: 4

    
Gwen M.
on 10/9/14 3:25 am
VSG on 03/13/14

Are you seeing a therapist?  I'm sure you've seen me say a billion times that mine is a key part of my well being.  

Do you have any hobbies that you can make social?  There are meet ups for just about everything :)  

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

Stacy_WLS
on 10/9/14 3:33 am

I have been, but not frequently enough.  My new job is so far away that we have been doing phone sessions.  It is tough.  I'm trying to get into see her tomorrow.  

 

My mom keeps telling me to do the meetups.  I don't have a ton of free time.  I want to get competitive in triathalons, but need to wait until i'm recovered from plastics for that.  Maybe I should find some gaming groups for now through recovery.  

VSG: 12/12/13, LBL, small TL, BL/BA: 11/7/14 Twins 12/9/18 HW after Twins 260. 5'10 37 years old - Stacy_WLS (MFP)

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