2 years ago...ready yourself for a ramble

It's my 2 year surgiversary and I've been trying to decide what to say.  So, I guess I'll start with the sucky stuff, first.  

Fuck it—let's get through this:

*I haven't made it to my personal goal of 140 (dream goal is 135). I'm 147.2 this am.  

*In July of this year I was diagnosed with melanoma. It's all gone. No worries.

*Last January, I threw myself into an unintended maintenance. I've been working on losing the rest of this weight since about June. It's slow, but it is going down.

Now for the good stuff:

*Last year I reached a personal non-sleeve goal (it's personal, so I'm not going to say any more about it).

*I started working part time at a Library—if books were food, I'd eat them.

*I'm in size 10-12's pants (my people are thick in the rump—you could set a table on my ass), medium (sometimes small) shirts and I have a pair of adorable leather boots that zip all the way up without any prayers or promises or superlatives.

*Before surgery I was on Simvastatin, Levothyroxine, 2000 mg of Metformin and a heart med-can't remember the name of it. By six months post op, I was off everything but the Simvastatin. Yes, my thyroid fixed itself—don't ask me how. *shrugs*

*I really like me. A lot. The 43 yo chick I see in the mirror is pretty damn cool.

For me life is just life. It's good sometimes, it sucks sometimes. The best thing this surgery gave me was the kick in the ass that I needed to make permanent changes in my eating. I try NOT to navigate my life with food at the wheel. Sure, I still **** up. When I was diagnosed with skin cancer, I ate my weight in ice cream and whipped topping. You can, by the way—eat your weight in crap foods. Anyone who says differently is lying to themselves and you. Oh sure, some of them will come along and say "gee, Slim, I can eat just a little bit of ******y ice cream and I'm satisfied." Well, therein lies the difference between me and you, I guess.

I was/am a SLOW loser. I think I now win for Slowest Loser in the ******g World—it's a coveted award. So, *****es, back off. It's mine.  Being a slow loser gave me a lot of time to learn about myself. I had to find smaller goals and start figuring out my brain because one ******g hiccup and the scale stopped moving. I had to find other things to keep me going that weren't related to the scale. I've watched a lot of people make it to goal, but I've watched a lot more NOT make it to goal and then get frustrated and then stop posting and then come back and ask for help. So, I guess I'm proud of me for staying in this for so long.

The key to success with this surgery is to figure out what works best for you. If something isn't working, make some small changes and see if that helps. Find the food plan that you think you can do long-term and don't deviate from it too much. I made the mistake of adding in protein bars at the beginning because I have a VERY small sleeve (at 2 years out, I can barely eat 2 oz of protein and maybe top it off with a 1/2 to 1 ounce of veggies at a meal).  The protein bars happen to be a trigger food for me. Yay... IMO, getting too creative and always trying to find something new and interesting to eat should be reserved for when you reach maintenance. Find a few "old reliables" and stick with them until you reach your goal.

If you are still here, reading this **** wow—you seriously need a hobby or something.

Look, this is easy (the head **** is the hard part). Take small steps. Look at the small picture. Make sure that the small picture is still fitting into the big picture. If it's not—make small  adjustments.

You all have a wonderful  day.

Headless pics - I don't do face pics (thank Facebook).

 

CONGRATULATIONS on all your accomplishments!
It really spoke to me when you said...
Look, this is easy...the head **** is the hard part...HELL YEAH!
Boy can I relate!!!

Thank you!

Hi Slim,

Congrats on your successes, both in weight loss and personal discovery. I am not far from you in size or timing. This last stage is definitely slow and challenging, but I am convinced it is doable!

all the best, Katy

Tenacity is your friend at the end. And in the middle. And the beginning.

Just have to hunker down and make it happen. :-)

You are my total hero Slim. And we are going to get down to a mud fight or something because that slow loser trophy --- I am going to fight you for it. I feel it in my bones. You are 7 lbs from your personal goal and I am at 13.5 from mine... But you seriously rock and I miss you when you don't post or chime in on other posts. Your perspective is always so strongly real, fresh and direct. 

I'm mean, I hate to lose and I play dirty. :-)

I hope you lose - nothing personal, but goal is better than that award.

This IS my hobby :)

congrats, I remember reading your posts when I first started 'reseaching', and am glad to see you back here!  You've done/doing really great...good for you!
Sophie

Thank you! Looks like you are rocking your sleeve, too.

Hey Slim! Congrats on your 2 years.  I miss your posting. No one puts it quite like you do.  With your perseverance you are going to get o goal.  And hey, I feel you on the books.  You have my dream job. Post more, please?