How do I broach VSG with my husband?

Perhaps listing the dangers of obesity awaiting you such as diabetes, high blood pressure, stroke, joint problems?

I researched and made all the prep work before talking about it with my husband.  Only once I was absolutely convinced that I needed the sleeve and HAD to go through with it did I discuss it with him.  At first he felt it was too drastic and dangerous but when you lay out the dangers of remaining obese...it all seems to balance out.  Added the fact that I was very unhappy with how I felt about myself and voila...5 months later tada.... :)

I also pointed out to him that the old age homes were NOT populated with obese patients...nope...hmmm...I wonder why?

I had already developed type II diabetes and told my DH how fearful I was of what was going to come down the road if I didn't have the surgery that would cause the reversal of my diabetes. And even if you don't have diabetes NOW,if you stay morbidly obese you WILL develop it,it is just a matter of WHEN not IF.

I told him how fearful I was of losing my legs one inch at a time till I had no legs below my knees,how much I didn't want to have diabetes burn my kidneys out and spend the last years of my life on dialysis. I told him how badly I did not want to go blind as diabetes will burn the retinas of your eyes right out of your head.

i told him how much I wanted to be able to hold our grandchildren on my lap and run and play with them which I could not do. I told him I wanted our twilight years to be as good as the years previous and I didn't want to die way before my time when there was a surgery that would prevent that.

After I told him all this ,he was totally on board and has been on board ever since.

GL

I sat down and told him, "I want to get weight loss surgery". He looked at me and said, "Okay, let's figure out what we have to do to make that happen."

I was kind of surprised that he had no questions or anything. I was SMO though.

My point? He might surprise you. Even when we found out insurance wouldn't cover any of it, it was "well, it's less than our car payment and you're worth it, so do it if you want, I'm here to support you"

The harsh reality is that obesity and overweight comes with a host of health issues. I really don't have much advice, just to talk - and then talk some more.

It is so awesome when guys surprise us with opening their hearts!

I wanted to have WLS 5 years ago. Then I was diagnosed with diabetes. My cousin had VSG & he saw the dramatic change in her. He was then diagnosed with diabetes. We both already had hypertension & high cholesterol. Several drs. recommended the surgery. I then was talking to the insurance co. about something unrelated so while I had them on the phone I asked about the coverage. He had some other issues I won't mention but all of these things starting getting to him. So I told him insurance will cover it I think we should have it. I found a dr. & he finally agreed. We had surgery 2weeks apart in Nov. 

good luck. I think I'd get your dr. to talk with him. Do you have any comorbidities? If you do have your dr. Point out the dangers of these & what you're risking by not getting the weight off, how much healthier you'll be after the surgery. 

I too have a husband that fell in love with the "big me". We talked several times about the surgery and he begged me to try different diet and healthy eating plans with him. After a year of sweating and not loosing anything I went for my yearly physical and talked to my PCP about it. She gave me the name of a Surgeon and told me to google him and attend a seminar. That evening I told my hubs I wanted to go to the seminar and check this guy out. No Cost No Strings No Commitment to anything. He reluctantly agreed to go. During the seminar I think my hubs listened closer than I did and certainly asked more questions. He had my health and safety in mind and I love him for that. From there Imade sure he was at every appointment with me. While I was in a dreamy world of "I could be a smaller healthier woman" he was looking for facts from everyone on my WL team. 

I can't remember any exact words but I let my BMI and results from my physical do the talking. I chose to have this surgery so that we would be better prepared physically and emotionally. (My surgeon answered all those questions as well).

HIs biggest reward at 9 weeks post-op is a very happy wife and more creative fun time in the bedroom.

Inbox me if you have any other questions.

Elizabeth

I would bring him to an informational meeting. It's a neutral setting and he can see all types there and you can ask the questions you want him to hear the answers to and he can ask any questions he actually has.

If he likes to read, I'd also send him links to articles showing that, once you get over 50 pounds overweight that you have next to no chance to lose it with diet and exercise and the dangers of being overweight.

As to being a "lightweight", when I got my VSG, my dh was also a lightweight and also opposed to surgery. I now am a normal BMI and running around having fun and he weighs 300 pounds, can fit in certain rides at the amusement park or in booths at restaurants and, worse, has type II diabetes, sleep apnea, high cholesterol, and high blood pressure. Today he got put on metformin. Oh and his pulse is high so he's running around with a mini-EKG for a few days to see if he's got heart problems. 5 years ago, all he had of that was the high cholesterol.

Basically, if you don't get WLS, that's your future. And the longer you are overweight and the more you weigh, the riskier the surgery is and the lower your chances are of losing it all and keeping it all of. Which is not to say the surgery is risky for the SMO or that the chances of losing the weight and keeping it off aren't 10x better than they are with diet/exercise alone. But still... why lower your odds and increase your risks when you are ready NOW just to get some bigger size that is considered acceptable by society? Society isn't living in your body. You are.