You can say it louder with a drum.
Great post! I've thought through this, at length, and realize that the real "work" is maintenance - and, like you've said, the commitment to doing "the right thing", even when you are getting no immediate gratification (scales, NSV's, comments from others).
Thanks for this!
January 8th, 2013 - VSG with Dr Paul Sullivan (St Joe's Toronto)
It is great that you are already thinking about what maintenance will look like for you. I found that I went into this whole process, fully focused on my maintenance. The long term pulled me forward and most of my choices and decisions were all based on what I thought my long term future would look like. This is partly why I pushed so hard in the early stages, I knew that "good enough" would just not cut it for me.
Elina, you can't know how amazed I was to see this post from you when I returned to OH this morning. Insightful and full of truth as always, but on a personal level it answers a question that had me up sleepless for a while last night: how do I keep this drive and momentum going if and when I reach goal weight? It wasn't so much about not receiving compliments or about things settling down in general, which you wisely mention here, but it was how to resist the inevitable temptation to think that I am "normal" and can eat "normal" food again.
Thank you for posting this!!
5'8" HRW 357 on 7/09/12 SW 339 >196 8/26/13 (surgeon's goal) TWL 193 CW 164
*:•-:¦:-•:*1st pers. goal 178 on 10/16/13; ultimate goal 164 on 12/13/13*:•-:¦:-•:*
Part of why I still post here daily is to remind myself that I am not and never have been or will be "normal" about food. It is not normal to need most of your stomach to be cut out to be able to maintain normal weight. I find that the trap you are speaking of is one of the most insidious traps out there. We so want to believe that we are cured, when the reality is that we are in remission and must stay vigilant forever, obesity is truly a disease with multiple tentacles and we just never know when we will get caught up with it again. Maintenance is mostly about not allowing yourself to become complacent and staying motivated and involved with your eating and weight management even when you think you are "normal".
As a pre-Op, I am very scared that after the "honeymoon" period, I will fall back into my terrible habits with food. I know I need the internal fortitude to make this into a marathon, and not a sprint.
I love your line: "you might be able to eat more calories and carbs, but it will not be limitless and all the strategies that you are using now, will need to be made even stronger in maintenance." I hope and pray that I can build up my fortitude like building a muscle....
In the 12-Step Program for food I was in for 14 years, they said a good line: "(Having) Character is sticking to a decision, even after the feelings that led you to make the decision have passed". Just like your drumming example....sticking with it even when you don;t feel like it, even when it appears (based on your new tiny pants size) that you don't have to....
Seriously - I have no clue what it feel like to have one wardrobe for longer than about 9 months. I've spent thousands and thousands of dollars on all new wardrobes in all new, bigger sizes... it is true insanity., But, as they also say in 12 -Step -- the definition of insanity is, "Doing the same things over and over again and expecting a different result". Getting Sleeved will be my most powerful tool, but I realize that after the first year or so, the tool will only be doing about 10% if the work. The other 90% will have to be all me.
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- Geneen Roth
