Building a healthy reward system post VSG

Frisco! You surprise me yet again. I am picturing you rolling all around california!

Enjoy Italy, take some pictures (ha!) id love to see it through your lens.

I will get there one day..swear.

**Like**

Honestly, I have transitioned to a place where I don't feel the need to reward myself at all.

If I do good things, the actions or the results of the actions are the reward.  I am present in my life and am connected with my feelings, so instead of buying something, I just feel the good feelings that came from my accomplishment.

My reward for losing weight is feeling good physically, emotionally and psychologically.  My reward for doing well at work is the respect, affection and accolades of my co-workers and the sense of accomplishment and self-esteem that comes from a job well-done.  My reward for doing well in school is knowing that I will easily get into the NP doctorate program next year, which will lead to the career change that I'm yearning for.  My reward for cleaning my house is living in a house that I love and want to take care of.

Being present in your life is a reward in and of itself.  It is the ultimate self-loving reward that you can obtain.  When you are constantly working for a "reward," you are telling yourself that NOW isn't good enough, and that YOU aren't good enough until you accomplish this or that. 

I have a list of things I want to do and/or buy, but I no longer feel the need to "earn" them by eating, exercising, studying, etc.  I have already earned them.  I am deserving of the life I want to live and the things I want to do, be and have right now.  While I may need to be patient or allocate my time and/or funds in a thoughtful manner, I don't need to do more or be someone else in order to "deserve" something. 

Now, I just keep a list of the things I want to do or have, and I prioritize them and obtain them when I have the ability. 

 I *love* you. 

i promised myself pre-surgery that once i deflated my body i would inflate the tires on my bike... so bike riding is one of my rewards.

Reading a book that engages me deeply, that i can lose myself in, is also one of my rewards.  Of course the coziness of reading in bed or curled up on the sofa is nice too.  (i used to camp out on the sofa with food.)

Naturally i will include my vote on the shopping for small size clothes as a reward.

Hats off to you, Sassy, on passing your vet school exams with flying colors!  Really impressive given that that is one of the most competitive and difficult professions!

 I am right there with you on the bike riding!  I just started that as my cross training on days I can't run.  I haven't been on a bike since I was like 13 - I forgot how much fun it can be and how much work!

I've been working on a list for reaching certain goals.  Some little, some bigger.  Getting to under 260 (big deal for me since I"ve been struggling to do it for 18 months)  is a new purse for summer, I've got pedicures, massage, day trip to Charleston to walk the bridge, new bikes for the family, switching from glasses to contacts and who knows what else :)  I also plan on sprinkling in some gifts for the hubby as I reach some goals, he has so much work to do taking care of a toddler after my surgery and changing his life as well. He is also 1 month smoke free so I'm very proud of him, for that he got $50 to spend on his Kindle.

 Great Post!  I saw this when I was out but wanted to be home to read it.  

We have to acknowledge that in our society we are taught from childhood that appropriate behavior is incentivized.  We don't do anything without expecting something in return.  As kids a lot of us were incentivized with food.  We all know how hard breaking the conditioning of a lifetime can be.

For me, i've gotten to a point where I don't do rewards for my mini-goals.  Rewarding myself was a rationalization that I used to justify eating off plan before.  "Ohhh, I worked out really hard I can have that pop-tart as a snack - its not sooomany calories".  I had to be careful about transferring that behavior so that it became "Ohhh, I worked out so hard, I deserve that Star Wars X-Box" (yes, I really want the special edition Star Wars X-Box console).

I do go shopping or do other things in celebration of mini-goals.  The operative word being to celebrate not reward.  For example - I may go out and try on every brand in Macy's to see what I can fit now.  I may make a special dinner and spend time at home with my Thomas.  We may plant a tree or something in the garden.  Just something special to mark the occasion.

Hard work as its own reward is just too hardcore evangelical for me. Everything we do is hard work - there need to be just as many celebrations as challenges!

Oh and congrats on the exams.  All of my neighbors at Auburn were vet students.  I know just how challenging and difficult that is.  Awesome accomplishment!

I like this concept of celebrations vs. rewards.

i definitely feel like these milestones deserve celebration.

then again, these days i feel like celebrating every freaking day because things just keep getting better.

but  anyway, thanks about the exams, and congrats on your awesome journey!

 what I'm trying to do as I reach milestones (even pre-op) is to celebrate with activities, not things or food. I'm trying to create a new lifestyle and that involves DOING stuff, not HAVING stuff.

some are tied to weight goals, like ziplining, others are mobility related, like snowshoeing, and some, like go-karting, are both.

I don't want to treat clothes as a reward because I really dislike shopping (even before I got into plus-size-store-only territory) plus I have to have a moderately professional wardrobe on tap. I don't like "spa" or "beauty salom" type things either - a pedi or a facial sounds more like torture than reward to me! :-)