Secret Sleever

 Afternoon OHer's!

I wanted to ask those of you who have decided to keep you wls private handle questions from outsider?! I personally have only told my immediate family and 4 closest friends about me getting sleeved. Now that I'm on my pre-op diet and have been drinking shakes my coworkers are asking what diet I'm on etc. A lot of them actually assume its Slim Fast. I just don't really respond and let them assume. I am by no means ashamed of my decision to have wls, it's just that right now I choose to keep it amoungst family. That is not to say that I will never go public with it but right now I choose not to. 
I said all that to say, how do you respond when asked how you are loosing weight? I don't want to lie and say Weigh****chers or Jenny Craig (lol), that would be totally misleading and is not in my character! 
Maybe a simple response such as "Diet & Exercise" will suffice?!

My family is the only ones that know about my wls. I told everyone i was having hernia surgery...which i did have a hiatel hernia repair at the same time....i just say im eating low carb because u really are so its not a lie! I just dont want the world to know, i live in a small town & people talk. thats just my personal view on the subject. Hope this helps

I am a secret sleever. Only a few family members know. My response is "I am training for a 5k and seeing a nut". This works and is true since I am doing C25K for my exercise and actually seeing a post op NUT.

I've said this about 10 times the last few days.

"A MAJOR lifstyle change, thanks for noticing the difference"  And I emphasize MAJOR, none went any farther with it.

No lies right:)

I am not telling a bunch of people either, only close friends. My parents don't know and if I have my say they never will. My dad pokes fun at my weight all the time and my mom has VERY strong opinions on WLS. Just don't want to go down that road with her at this point. The only family member outside of my house that knows is my younger brother.

I plan on telling those that push the issue that I am on a "doctor supervised diet'. I figure it is the truth and unless I know they are looking into WLS themselves I won't offer up more information to those I don't know that well. There are a couple of people I work near, in a large corporation, that have had surgery too. They have both been a great source of information and support as needed. But on a daily basis my main support is at home with my husband and family...and this site!

anyway...that is my two cents worth.

I am a secret sleever also. Only a few know. I had my gallbladder out at the same time so everyone thinks that was my surgery.
I just say I am one a high protien low carb diet and exercise.. All of which is true.
I am proud of my choice to have WLS I just didn't want to hear everyone elses opinions about it or the ones that judge you for it.
Julie

Keep it simple. You'll tell when or if you are ready.  This issue stresses people out because they overcomplicate things and feel obligations that really don't exist.

Of course saying Jenny Craig would be a lie. So simply say, - liquid diet if you are doing a liquid diet; I don't eat much; lifestyle change; I'm watching what I eat and exercising.

Some people say that if you don't tell the full details that is also lying. Well, I say that is stupid. I'm a grown woman, and I don't have to even answer the question.

It has never stressed me because I don't feel obligated to tell my business. My mother taught me that you should be careful about who you let in your house and tell your business.

This is an emotional process. Deal with it at your pace- not the pace of some stranger in a different body and in a different cir****tance.

 I really don't get the "secret" thing and I see it over and over again.  I even saw it in a restaurant this weekend - someone hiding the fact that they had WLS, when it was completely obvious by how they were eating and their companions commenting on it.  Its obvious when you lose 100+ lbs in 6 months that its not JUST diet and exercise.

It seems to me that there must be some shame tied to the need to hide what you are doing, else why hide it?  I had people think I was taking the easy way out.  IF it was someon's opinion I cared about I explained and educated.  If it wasn't someone whos opionon I was thought worthwhile, well then screw em.

At the end of the day this is a decision I made for m yself and those I love to be healthier and happier.  In my mind its a decision to be proud of.  I am proud of the work I am doing on both my body and my mind to become a healthier person.  I am not going to hide that and lie about it.

In one of the exercise from my psychologist led group, we are told when we feel head hunger to stop and explore why we are feeling the way we are at that moment.  Stop and deal with the emotion, rather than covering it by eating.  I think the same thing applies here:

You say you don't want to lie.  Why do you feel the need to then?  What is it that really makes you nervous about giving a simple "I had surgery to help me lose weight, and its really going well"?  You don't have to go into detail.  

Think forward to your first meal out with friends and they remark, like the person this weekend, and others notice the odd wa you eat now - protein first, no drinking with meals, small ammounts - and ask.  Theres another lie, another little secret.

Come on out of the bariatric closet.  Lifes sweet on the other side and alot less complicated.

 I don't believe that not sharing information is lying. By no means am I in a "closet". My decision to tell who I want when I want is a matter of personal preference and choice. It's not something that others need to agree with or understand. I didn't say I would never tel others about my surgery, I stated that I'm not doing so at this time. 

FYI- 'Secret Sleevers' is just a play on words.