What I have learned in 2 months (TIC)
So I am not that far out yet I know but I have had a few learning experiences and I wanted to share them with y'all! (TIC= toungue in cheek by the way)
1.) That one bite when you feel full but think maybe you can squeak in just one more is a warning. It will not be pretty if you take that one more bite. In fact it could get downright Exorcist on you if you take it. One more bite does not equal bliss... it equals demons clawing their way out of the pit via your esophagus.
2.) The scale lies. I think it gets paid to lie by the ice cream man. Yoga pants falling off your butt in the middle of a busy work day however do not lie! Get thee hence to a Walmart and get a smaller size immediately. Thus saith the sleeve.
3.) Not all carbs are equal. Carbs that make you hungry for more carbs are the Debil! and should not be allowed in the house under pain of death or at least being banned to sleep on the couch. Good carbs that make your brain happy and functional and don't leave you craving more bad carbs should be rewarded with foot rubs or at the very least a nice card.
4.) Beating yourself up over mistakes in what is a good food choice or a bad food choice is futile. There are enough people willing to beat you up for it out there, adding your own bruising to the mix just makes you hurt worse. Next meal make the best choice possible for your body and take away the mean people's ammo.
5.) Everyone else is going to tell you what you can and can't eat regardless of whether or not they have had weight loss surgery or not or ever tried to diet or not or ever had a weight issue in their life or not. Eat what makes your body feel strong and healthy in quatities that do not make you do the pea soup mamba.
6.) Weight loss surgery is not magic. "Gasp" I know right? Who knew? It's true though. It will not make you instantly skinny, gorgeous, rich, funny, amazing, powerful, loved, or any other thing we hope that it fixes. Our brains need a special weight loss surgery all their own... it's called therapy. If you know that eating one Pringles Cheezum chip is going to equal the whole can of Pringles Cheezum chips being devoured in one sitting until you are doing the pea soupl dance then perhaps a little one on one with a good head shrinker is in order. Now where did I put that magic lamp???
7.) Every single person out there that has had weight loss surgery is different just like everyone else. What works for you may not work for me. And if you are like everybody else who is different you will have to figure out a few things on your own. Like how and when and what to eat and hope and pray it doesn't change tomorrow or you will be doing the pea soup dance....again.
8.) Nobody likes the liquid diet. Really and truly. Remember when we went on the liquid diets before the weight loss surgery? We may have stuck it out for 2 weeks because we forced ourselves to but we didn't like it then either. Guess what? This is the last time we have to foce ourselves to stick to a liquid diet for 2 weeks ever again (if we use our tool correctly of course and there are no other complications of course). So that being said, there is no way to really make a full liquid diet taste good. There is no way to make the liquid diet make you feel full and happy with what you just drank. Suffering through it is your only option and then it will only be made somewhat better by getting to add applesauce, small curd cottage cheese, and vanilla yogurt at the end of the 2 weeks. Of course you may have to suffer through the pureed stage for 2 weeks too and theres only so much you can puree that tastes decent. The point is suck it up buttercup, if you did your homework you knew what you were in for when you signed up for this.
9.) You MUST move to continue to lose weight. Stalls happen yes but if you just sit on the couch eating buttered popcorn watching reruns of Bones on Netflix you will eventually stop losing the weight and get stuck in a stall forever. Remember from science class... a body in motion remains in motion, a body in stasis will remain in stasis. Even if you can't move too far, move as far as you can everyday. At least that way you are further away from where you started.
Well that's what I have learned so far in the last 2 months. I meant this post to be funny not rip on anyone (except maybe myself because I apparently like beating myself up along with letting others do it to me as well) so please do not take offense at anything said here. Other than that I hope you got a good laugh from it.
1.) That one bite when you feel full but think maybe you can squeak in just one more is a warning. It will not be pretty if you take that one more bite. In fact it could get downright Exorcist on you if you take it. One more bite does not equal bliss... it equals demons clawing their way out of the pit via your esophagus.
2.) The scale lies. I think it gets paid to lie by the ice cream man. Yoga pants falling off your butt in the middle of a busy work day however do not lie! Get thee hence to a Walmart and get a smaller size immediately. Thus saith the sleeve.
3.) Not all carbs are equal. Carbs that make you hungry for more carbs are the Debil! and should not be allowed in the house under pain of death or at least being banned to sleep on the couch. Good carbs that make your brain happy and functional and don't leave you craving more bad carbs should be rewarded with foot rubs or at the very least a nice card.
4.) Beating yourself up over mistakes in what is a good food choice or a bad food choice is futile. There are enough people willing to beat you up for it out there, adding your own bruising to the mix just makes you hurt worse. Next meal make the best choice possible for your body and take away the mean people's ammo.
5.) Everyone else is going to tell you what you can and can't eat regardless of whether or not they have had weight loss surgery or not or ever tried to diet or not or ever had a weight issue in their life or not. Eat what makes your body feel strong and healthy in quatities that do not make you do the pea soup mamba.
6.) Weight loss surgery is not magic. "Gasp" I know right? Who knew? It's true though. It will not make you instantly skinny, gorgeous, rich, funny, amazing, powerful, loved, or any other thing we hope that it fixes. Our brains need a special weight loss surgery all their own... it's called therapy. If you know that eating one Pringles Cheezum chip is going to equal the whole can of Pringles Cheezum chips being devoured in one sitting until you are doing the pea soupl dance then perhaps a little one on one with a good head shrinker is in order. Now where did I put that magic lamp???
7.) Every single person out there that has had weight loss surgery is different just like everyone else. What works for you may not work for me. And if you are like everybody else who is different you will have to figure out a few things on your own. Like how and when and what to eat and hope and pray it doesn't change tomorrow or you will be doing the pea soup dance....again.
8.) Nobody likes the liquid diet. Really and truly. Remember when we went on the liquid diets before the weight loss surgery? We may have stuck it out for 2 weeks because we forced ourselves to but we didn't like it then either. Guess what? This is the last time we have to foce ourselves to stick to a liquid diet for 2 weeks ever again (if we use our tool correctly of course and there are no other complications of course). So that being said, there is no way to really make a full liquid diet taste good. There is no way to make the liquid diet make you feel full and happy with what you just drank. Suffering through it is your only option and then it will only be made somewhat better by getting to add applesauce, small curd cottage cheese, and vanilla yogurt at the end of the 2 weeks. Of course you may have to suffer through the pureed stage for 2 weeks too and theres only so much you can puree that tastes decent. The point is suck it up buttercup, if you did your homework you knew what you were in for when you signed up for this.
9.) You MUST move to continue to lose weight. Stalls happen yes but if you just sit on the couch eating buttered popcorn watching reruns of Bones on Netflix you will eventually stop losing the weight and get stuck in a stall forever. Remember from science class... a body in motion remains in motion, a body in stasis will remain in stasis. Even if you can't move too far, move as far as you can everyday. At least that way you are further away from where you started.
Well that's what I have learned so far in the last 2 months. I meant this post to be funny not rip on anyone (except maybe myself because I apparently like beating myself up along with letting others do it to me as well) so please do not take offense at anything said here. Other than that I hope you got a good laugh from it.
VSG on 04/05/12
So can I tell you I bookmarked this post after reading item #2...I was already in stiches! Bwahahahahahaha!
HW: 475, Consult WT: 450.5 **Lost 63 lbs pre-op** SW: 387.5 M1: -31, M2:
Check out my blog about my journey so far: http://breakingoutbebe.blogspot.com
I like your post a lot. It wasn't offensive at all. Not even sort of. That's me watching reruns of Bones on Netflix, without the popcorn though. I really like the move as far as you can every day and at least you're further than you were. The last 2 weeks I've been so depressed that I have refused to move at all :(
Aw hon I am so sorry to hear about the depression. I know that it gets so hard to do this the right way the problem is that we really can't go back to the old way of dealing because we can seriously hurt ourselves if we do (not to mention the dreaded pea soupl mamba will haunt us if we do). if I were closer I would come over and drag you off the couch and we would go take a walk around the park and commiserate!! And when we got done walking I would sit on the couch and watch Bones with you sans popcorn but maybe we could nibble on some.... hmmm what WOULD be good commiserating/Bones watching noms? I don't eat and watch tv anymore cus then I find the demons are clawing their way up again. okay i got it.. we will commiserate by painting our nails (fingers and toes.. 3 coats each.. commiserating well takes time you know?)
Well anyway I am thinking of you today and will be sending "motivated to take a walk" vibes your way!
Big hugs!
Well anyway I am thinking of you today and will be sending "motivated to take a walk" vibes your way!
Big hugs!