A little Discouraged

So you may remember i posted that I want to be able to compete in Ms. Fitness in August of this year? Well I may have to move that goal. August is only a few months away now  and I feel like my workouts just aren't cutting it. I am not getting toned as quickly as I would like and I don't have the time to be working out 2 hours a day to get the results I want to see. I have to do that wonderful thing called work and unless I quit (yeah not gonna happen at this point) I am not going to be able to have the time. I have to do this a lot slower than I wanted. But that's me. I get an idea in my head and I go as fast and as hard as I can to get it done. I am really bad about wanting instant results lol. But then I have lost 30+ pounds in 6 weeks and if I can do it again, in another 6 weeks I'll be at my goal of 150 by summer. I am sticking with the plan with very few deviations but I feel like I am running out of time to get the weight off AND get toned up AND get a routine put together AND learn all the stuff I need to learn to feel confident enough to compete. I don't want to win the damn thing but i don't want to look like a complete idiot out there either.
Anyway, I will keep working on it and hopefully before the end of the year I will be ready for competition. Thanks for letting me vent!

HI Kahlana,

I am sorry it isnt coming together the way you want it to. It sounds like you have come so far and have created so many positives in your life. You have already won. You have had this surgery, lost a great deal of weight and have continued to work and do all the day to day things we women(sorry guys) have to do. That is huge. It is hard to have a dream and then not realize it in the time frame we set forth for ourselves. But to dream and work towards the dream is really the important part. I know saying there is always next year is not something you want to hear, but you can do this then. You can spend the next year training w/o stress and get into the the best shape of your life. You can make another goal for August that will not create stress and will bing you closer to next year. You go girl! {{{Hugs}}} Sharon

Thanks Sharon, I am bummed to realize that I wont make the goal right now BUT I also know that the cool things about goals is that they can be adjusted to fit life as needed. And for now its more important that I rearrange my goals than try to control all the life stuff that keeps happening. Not that I have much control over that stuff anyway lol. Just hanging in and I will get there eventually. Just a little disappointed that I set a goal like that too soon. Ah well, lesson learned lol.

Similar, but not the same, is me and running.  I had this vision of myself at this weight that I'd be a really good runner.  Not so much.  I'm slow and lumbering.  Much better than I was 90 pounds ago, but still not the runner I envisioned.  So I guess I'll just keep doing it and trying to improve.  Ran two miles outside this morning (first time outside this year!).  It felt good, but still not the pace I'd like to be at.

All we can do is keep practicing, trying, refining our skills and do our best!  You can do this, girlfriend!

Silly I hope you dont mind but I am so proud of you! I couldnt even begin to imagine being able to run again. I haven't done it since I was in the Coast Guard 20 something years ago. Im afraid i'll kill my knees or ankles lol. Maybe if I get stronger and more toned I'll give it a shot again but I was never a great runner. Queen of the crunches and pushups yes but running not so much. lol. You keep going too! You have been doing fabulous yourself you know!

Sounds like you're being way too hard on yourself.

You're doing an amazing job. Even if you do have to put off the competition for a litle longer, that just gives you more time to prepare and show up your opponents

I hope that I have results as amazing as yours. Keep up the great work!

Moonglo, I am usually too hard on myself aabout a LOT of things not just my fitness goals lol.And I do agree with you about having more time to get ready for the competitions. If nothing else there is always next August and I can use the rest of this year to compete locally a little bit at a time. 

I know you are going to be absolutely fabulous with your sleeve! You are such an inspiration to me!

Yes, I think you have the right attitude.  Recalibrate your goal to meet your current situation.  Sure it's dissapointing to not meet your goal, but look at how far you have come and how much you have already accomplished. I'm impatient like you.  I'm one month out of surgery and I've "only" lost 46 lbs. Something that I need to keep reminding myself is that the journey to your goal is just as important as the goal itself. 

Jack, I am trying to keep a positive outlook and continue doing the right things. After more research i have been able to narrow down the steps i need to take to reach that competition goal and i will get there I just have a lot of things to learn first :) Not that I ever found learning something new a bad thing per se.
So, thank you so much for the encouragement! It's wonderful having such supportive people surrounding me.

Sorry your timeline is changing but you are wise to put your journey into perspective. Please celebrate all the things you are doing right and let the other stuff go. This is a new life and not about focusing on the disappointments. That's what we used to do that got us to this point. You are doing so much right on your weight loss journey. You'll get there!!