Sad, from Post Secret today...

I only started a month before when I realized that I needed it and I was deluding myself that I didn't. At least I did see it though I was a little slow with it.

I think most of us have other underlying issues to deal with. It's not just because we're hungry ;) Sigh... it sucks and it's "not fair" but well... suck it up, buttercup, right? LOL!

I really get this.  I had a double whammy last year -- surgery and a divorce.  It has taken me the greater part of a year since my divorce to get used to the emptiness that resulted from living alone, sometimes with my daughter and sometimes without. 

Counseling has helped a lot.  Exercise has helped a lot.  I have a new-found love of yoga -- both for exercise purposes and also for emotional/spiritual purposes.  I set some new non-weight loss goals that I am working towards.  I go to school part time, working towards eventually getting my Doctorate NP degree.  I am also working towards fulfilling my life-long dream of owning horses.  I'm trying to get my finances in order so I can take a really great vacation or two every year.

I think that I've needed to focus on doing three things:  the first being filling my time with purposeful and meaningful non-food related activities (school, yoga, decorating my house); the second being setting non-weightloss related goals (I think we're all guilty of thinking, "if only I were thin, my life would be perfect," when it is far from the truth.); the third being truly grateful and savoring the good, non-food things in your life (if you don't have anything you savor on a daily basis, you need to get some.)

I have found this journal to be an amazing tool to help me focus my energy and hone my priorities.  It's the only journal I've ever done on a regular basis.  It takes 5 minutes before bed every night, and I love the repitition of the "gratitude" and "savor" entries. 
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1402762399/ref=oh_o02_s00_i 00_details

Mostly, I think it's just hard dealing with the issues from our past that have contributed to our current state of affairs.  We've been carrying them around for a lifetime, so they're not going to disappear over night.  I can say that from my own journey, most of mine are finally resolved, but I've been going to counseling off and on for 4 years and have put in the "work" required to resolve them.  I still have one more tricky issue to work on, and then I'm feeling good to go. 

Yeah, I find myself resisting stuff in therapy. I don't want to deal with them. I know I need to though. I'm trying and taking VERY small steps, but 36 years worth of crap is bubbling around in there so taking it slow has to be how it is. 

Thanks for sharing. I feel less "alone" in the "well, this part sucks" part of it. Sometimes everyone is entirely too damned rosy around here *laughing*

Nah, I'm better... I was in a very nasty bad place a few weeks ago. I feel fake when family asks "how are you" and saying "fine" because I was NOT fine. Ha!

 That journal looks awesome - just ordered 2, one for me and one for my partner (hope he doesn't mind!)

Thanks for sharing.

 I don't have the emptiness part of it, but the anger (and fear) have been holding me hostage the past few weeks. Thank you for sharing this, it's important for people to know that sometimes you might think you have things worked out, and BAM it hits you in the face and all the old feelings come rushing back in. 

Yeah, I think after the holidays, I just kind of crashed out and got ticked. *laughing*

I also agree that people need to realize the other side of it, but I wonder if they really will understand until it hits them over the head. I know I didn't really know what I was getting into. Maybe it's like child birth, you don't REALLY understand until you've done it yourself?

We'll get there! I know we can.

I saw this today too, big PS fan. First thing I do when I get up on Sunday mornings!

Anyway, I had a similar reaction and I often wonder if being thin is really going to make me happy or if I'll just find other reasons to hate myself. I guess therapy is in order to remedy that.

I think this is why they talk so much about transfer addiction. Those of us with weight issues didn't get that way because of just the food. I'd be willing to bet that the vast majority have other issues as well. (Mine was just stuffing down feelings of - well, you name it - happiness, sadness, and everything in between with food. Food was my friend and made it all better or made celebrations even sweeter).

But yeah. I think therapy is the only way I'll truly be whole again. It's been a rough few weeks. I think the fact that you recognize the issue and meet it head on gives you an edge though, at least you're aware of it. I don't know about you, but I lived in denial for a very long time.

(and yeah, I LOVE PS - always makes me laugh and think at the same time)

Thanks for posting this, sleevegirl.  That "Oh **** now what???" feeling hits at some point, and we realize that we can no longer blame all the bad things that happen to us on being fat, that obesity no longer defines us.  I find that I focus on other physical imperfections, and blame them.  ("That person was rude to me because my teeth are crooked.")  Talk about self-involvement!  OA has a saying, "The piece of **** that the world revolves around."  I.e., low self-esteem, but our own imperfections drive EVERYTHING in our lives.

I have been frustrated by therapy in the past, because I resist it so much (so glad you said that!), that we don't get down to the issue until the hour is up.  And then I have to leave, and I come back the next time with my walls right back up.  I guess the answer would be to book a couple hours, or stop resisting.  The 2-hour session would be easier, haha!

ROFLMAO! I agree, the 2 hour would be easier. I'm working on stopping myself when I find myself trying to change the subject or deflect something. It's hard though because... well, it's what I do! If I can't hide behind the fat I can throw enough shiny objects at you so you don't notice that I'm not really doing what I'm supposed to be doing.

Ha!

Oh, it's all such a head game. And yeah, I guess that's really part of it, right? I mean, we all think the word revolves around us in many ways so it HAS to be about you. Always.

HUGS and glad this post resonated with someone other than me this week!