Scary Stuff Going On Here.......

(Sorry in advance, this is long.)  OK.....I am going to jump in here.  I am a "Middle".  I have passed my 6 month mark and am not on here as much anymore as I used to be.  I am a combo of "out living my life", feeling like I have "got this in control" and kinda slacking off a little too. 

I understand both sides of this discussion.

I don't know Frisco personally but I try to read all his posts.  Frisco's writing style has him coming off as a "to the point", "no nonsense" kinda guy that isn't all warm and fuzzy.  However, I bet he's a teddy bear with a big heart.  I think some people take his way of communication right on the chin and that is not the way they like to get their info.

Another aspect of this discussion is something that has worried me too.  I see a lot of people that have not been given the info that they should or they haven't done the research they need to do.  They are looking for that easy fix that will make them fart rainbows and **** sunbeams while getting a svelte body, making everything right with their world.  I don't know if these people are intentionally not wanting to know or just don't know that they don't know.  Either way, I lose patience with these posts.  This didn't happen on OH but here's an example of the same type of thing I see sometimes on this forum that has some of the "vets" upset:  I have a friend that wants to have VSG.    She desperately needs it but it will be a financial hardship because her insurance doesn't cover the surgery.  I have steered her to this website, recommended my doc as a self payer.  I gave her a copy of Dr. Alvarez's book.  Put TONS of info, research articles, sample recipes, etc on a thumb drive for her to review while making her  decision.  Two months later, she gives me back the book, the thumb drive and admits that she hasn't read any of it or been on OH even once.  Her reason?  This is an exact quote...."With a smart friend like you that's doing good, why do I need to read all this stuff?  I can just call you when I have a question."  I was dumbfounded.  Why would you alter your body, spend thousands of $$, risk your life/health and not learn the first thing about it?  Needless to say, I backed off and am helping to encourage someone else.

There are also doctors/teams/programs out there that scare the hell out of me.  'Nuff said.

Then there are those people that aren't given a lot of info or prep but they make the effort to go out on their own and get it.  THESE are the people I want to help. 

Going thru this surgery is a whole lot like giving birth.  With my first child, I read every book on pregnancy, childbirth, childcare, etc. in the library.  I went to Lamaze.  I ate healthy and exercised.  Followed my doctor's directions.  Went into labor and was doing great.  27 hours later, when the doc told me that he needed to do a C-section, I was like, "Time out.  Can we just put this on pause for a few hours?  I promise I'll finish later but I am so tired, so hungry and I just want a break".  I was prepared as hell, just like I was for my VSG but the reality of it all was too much at times.  I knew then I didn't have a choice but to continue on and I didn't have a choice but to keep following my plan after VSG if I wanted a good outcome. 

I think everyone is looking at Frisco's post thru their own narrow perspective and getting their feathers ruffled.  This is an emotional journey and this forum is the ONE PLACE where we expect to find understanding, no matter our point in the journey.  That's great and I hope we all find it but remember, we are all adults and we need to try and look at things from other perspectives.

I used to read EVERY post but now, I can tell if it's one that is going to frustrate, exasperate, offend or simply waste my time.  I just skip those.  I try to respond to those that I feel I can contribute to.  And, like Frisco, I have had some PM conversations with people to help them make their decision, get back on their path, etc.  I am giving back because someone did the same for me.

Now I am a weird bird.  I went thru the whole trip of trying to get insurance approval with one group (psyc testing, cardiac clearance, NUT counseling, etc.) only to go to Mexico where there were few requirements and the expectation that there wouldn't be much after care support.  That was fine with me.  I had OH and the ability to think for myself and find the answers I needed.  I wouldn't change a thing.  Would I recommend it to everyone?  HELL NO!  But I've found my path, and I'm succeeding.

And Frisco.......keep it up.  Love ya, man.

Don,,I know you and Frisco don't gel but it takes a helluva man to support and stand up for someone when you aren't their biggest fan.  And your post was very eloquently stated.  Kudos to you!

Like Forrest Gump...."that's all I've got to say about that". 

Amy, I think you are completely right...in my case anyway.  I am just almost 5 1/2 months out.  Before and immediately after I got my sleeve, I was on this website every chance I could.  I couldn't read enough or learn enough.  I had tons of questions and most of them were answered without me having to actually ask them.  All I had to do was read.  At this point I don't have a lot of questions.  I'm losing consistently 10 lbs/month, so I hardly ever check in here.  I only come around once or twice/week.  I'm on Christmas break for 2 weeks, so I'm on here more frequently right now.

Another point to make is that this is certainly not the first post by the op of this sort.  There have been several posts implying (or downright stating) that new sleevers are unprepared and and that other surgeons' plans are nowhere near as good as his and our success will not match his own.  Which sleevers he is referring to is impossible to tell.  As a result, all of us newbies are made to feel inferior whether that is the intention or not.  It gets old.