Why do so many look for all the excuses?
You are right to a point but I think you've over simplified what many people go through...and just because you have somehow gotten control of your life (and congratulations on that wonderful achievement) does not mean that everybody else can just hop to it and do it too.
If you really want to know why people make excuses....having weight loss surgery does not stop food addiction. Realistically speaking if the excuse makers could of solved their obesity problem by simply pulling themselves up by the boot straps and eating tofu and celery I think they would of done that a long time before their weight got so out of control. Nobody wants to be obese. I totally agree 100% with making responsible choices and not blaming others for our failures..BUT...(my excuse) its not that easy to change a life time of bad habits or simply, poof, get rid of underlying emotional issues just because one had weight loss surgery. Quite frankly I'm still not sure how I'm going to stop doing what I have been doing for the last 40 yrs.
(More excuses) Carbs make me numb...they are my drug of choice. I always say being a food addict is like telling an alcoholic to go into a tavern and drink 2 oz. of beer 3 times a day. I wonder how successful they would be at beating their addiction if that had to do that daily.
At least when you're an alcoholic or drug addict you don't have to consume your addiction day in and day out in order to survive. I'm an emotional over eater. I eat when I'm sad, I eat when I'm happy, I eat because I'm bored, I eat when I'm not experiencing true stomach hunger because it tastes good, I eat because its a "special occasion". (Reality) I have been on every diet under the sun. I've walked around the block an million times. I know about all good nutrition. I cook from scratch and don't eat alot of junk food. I watched my father die from obesity and heart disease....laid my head on his chest and wept while he was on his death bed. I went to Weigh Down Workshop weekly for two years which basically scares the bejesus out of you by preaching gluttony is a mortal sin and you are going to hell if you don't stop over eating. I know obesity will lead to an early death. Countless times I've cried out to God and asked him to give me the strength to stop the insanity. Since you seem to have all the answers...please tell me WHY did none of that have the ability to stop me from over eating? Is this some kind of self loathing or a slow suicide? Oh how I wish the solution was as simple as just not putting the food in my mouth
and walking around the block because if it was I wouldn't have this awful burden of fat ruining my looks, robbing me of the ability to do more of the physical things I love to do and destroying my health all these years.
If you really want to know why people make excuses....having weight loss surgery does not stop food addiction. Realistically speaking if the excuse makers could of solved their obesity problem by simply pulling themselves up by the boot straps and eating tofu and celery I think they would of done that a long time before their weight got so out of control. Nobody wants to be obese. I totally agree 100% with making responsible choices and not blaming others for our failures..BUT...(my excuse) its not that easy to change a life time of bad habits or simply, poof, get rid of underlying emotional issues just because one had weight loss surgery. Quite frankly I'm still not sure how I'm going to stop doing what I have been doing for the last 40 yrs.
(More excuses) Carbs make me numb...they are my drug of choice. I always say being a food addict is like telling an alcoholic to go into a tavern and drink 2 oz. of beer 3 times a day. I wonder how successful they would be at beating their addiction if that had to do that daily.
At least when you're an alcoholic or drug addict you don't have to consume your addiction day in and day out in order to survive. I'm an emotional over eater. I eat when I'm sad, I eat when I'm happy, I eat because I'm bored, I eat when I'm not experiencing true stomach hunger because it tastes good, I eat because its a "special occasion". (Reality) I have been on every diet under the sun. I've walked around the block an million times. I know about all good nutrition. I cook from scratch and don't eat alot of junk food. I watched my father die from obesity and heart disease....laid my head on his chest and wept while he was on his death bed. I went to Weigh Down Workshop weekly for two years which basically scares the bejesus out of you by preaching gluttony is a mortal sin and you are going to hell if you don't stop over eating. I know obesity will lead to an early death. Countless times I've cried out to God and asked him to give me the strength to stop the insanity. Since you seem to have all the answers...please tell me WHY did none of that have the ability to stop me from over eating? Is this some kind of self loathing or a slow suicide? Oh how I wish the solution was as simple as just not putting the food in my mouth
and walking around the block because if it was I wouldn't have this awful burden of fat ruining my looks, robbing me of the ability to do more of the physical things I love to do and destroying my health all these years.
VSG Aug. 30, 2011 HW 266 SW 249 GW 166 lbs.
A very dear friend of mine was in a very bad way. She had a very screwed-up upbringing with parents who indulged in the worst excesses of the 70's and 80's. She went to jail in her early 20's for drugs, and she barely escaped doing 20 years in federal prison .That's how we met. I was doing volunteer work at a half-way house when she was released from jail. She spent years in AA/NA in 'recovery' while at the same time still making bad choices, sleeping around, going from one thing to a the next in the hopes that she would be 'happy.' Guess what? She got over it. She 'recovered.' At 43, she has a great career, a stable relationship, and she can have a glass of wine. If you ask her, she'll tell you it wasn't easy but it started with small steps -- making good choices, developing good habits, until she internalized them. The progress she made filled the 'I need to feel better' hole that used to require drugs/sex/alchohol/shopping and whatnot.
JMO, but that's what the vets (old medic, elina, usafwife, brandilynn) preach, here. Make the right choices, develop the habits, and your head will work itself out. The sleeve helps accelerate the progress so the good choices have more immediate payback than a diet preop.
JMO, but that's what the vets (old medic, elina, usafwife, brandilynn) preach, here. Make the right choices, develop the habits, and your head will work itself out. The sleeve helps accelerate the progress so the good choices have more immediate payback than a diet preop.
Carolyn (32 lbs lost Pre-op) HW: 291, SW: 259, GW: 129.5, CW: 126.4
Age: 45, Height: 5'2 1/4" , Stretch Goal: 122 
"Food addiction" IS just another excuse. Sorry, but it is merely an excuse to let yourself do what you want to do.
I know about addiction (I have been counseling addicts since 1964), and I know about fat. My family is filled with alcoholics (which is why I stopped drinking back in 1969). I have worked (as a professional counselor) with people with just about every form of addiction that is recognized by the APA.
The only "addiction" related to food is that we all have to do it, or we will die. In that sense, we are all "food addicts". But as an addiction per se, so called "Food Addiction" is just another excuse to allow us to keep on eating.
You can call it whatever you want to call it, but an excuse is an excuse is an excuse. "I'm not responsible, it's my addiction that makes me fat!"
That kind of an excuse you will find in large piles around a cattle feed lot.
Sorry, but each and every one of us is soley responsible for what we choose to do. No "addiction" ever forces us to do anything, and that includes alcohol addiction, drug addiction or eating food.
That's why the "12 Step Programs" are the mostr effective at breaking the cycle of addiction. In all 12 Step Programs, you have to accept responsibility for your own actions.
I was 100% responsible for eating myself into a 412 pound blob.
I was also responsible for CHOOSING to do something about that, and then actually following through.
You can continue to make excuses, and you will fail. Or, you can accept the responsibility for your own CHOICES IN LIFE, decide to change those behaviors, and succeed.
It is NOT easy. You may well have some psychological issues to be dealt with (I did). But, claiming that you are a "food addict" does nothing positive for you at all. It just gives you an excuse to keep on failing.
"I can't help myself, I'm an addict."
It's your choice, make excuses and keep on failing, or accept responsibility and change your life.
I hope that you will accept responsibility for yourself, and change your life.
I know about addiction (I have been counseling addicts since 1964), and I know about fat. My family is filled with alcoholics (which is why I stopped drinking back in 1969). I have worked (as a professional counselor) with people with just about every form of addiction that is recognized by the APA.
The only "addiction" related to food is that we all have to do it, or we will die. In that sense, we are all "food addicts". But as an addiction per se, so called "Food Addiction" is just another excuse to allow us to keep on eating.
You can call it whatever you want to call it, but an excuse is an excuse is an excuse. "I'm not responsible, it's my addiction that makes me fat!"
That kind of an excuse you will find in large piles around a cattle feed lot.
Sorry, but each and every one of us is soley responsible for what we choose to do. No "addiction" ever forces us to do anything, and that includes alcohol addiction, drug addiction or eating food.
That's why the "12 Step Programs" are the mostr effective at breaking the cycle of addiction. In all 12 Step Programs, you have to accept responsibility for your own actions.
I was 100% responsible for eating myself into a 412 pound blob.
I was also responsible for CHOOSING to do something about that, and then actually following through.
You can continue to make excuses, and you will fail. Or, you can accept the responsibility for your own CHOICES IN LIFE, decide to change those behaviors, and succeed.
It is NOT easy. You may well have some psychological issues to be dealt with (I did). But, claiming that you are a "food addict" does nothing positive for you at all. It just gives you an excuse to keep on failing.
"I can't help myself, I'm an addict."
It's your choice, make excuses and keep on failing, or accept responsibility and change your life.
I hope that you will accept responsibility for yourself, and change your life.
A former Army Medic (1959-1969), Registered Nurse (1969-2000), College Instructor (1984-1989) and a retired Rehabilitation Counselor. I am also a dual citizen of the USA and Canada.
High Weight 412 lbs. Date of Surgery 360.5 Present 170 lbs
High Weight 412 lbs. Date of Surgery 360.5 Present 170 lbs
On September 17, 2011 at 10:51 AM Pacific Time, OldMedic wrote:
"Food addiction" IS just another excuse. Sorry, but it is merely an excuse to let yourself do what you want to do.
I know about addiction (I have been counseling addicts since 1964), and I know about fat. My family is filled with alcoholics (which is why I stopped drinking back in 1969). I have worked (as a professional counselor) with people with just about every form of addiction that is recognized by the APA.
The only "addiction" related to food is that we all have to do it, or we will die. In that sense, we are all "food addicts". But as an addiction per se, so called "Food Addiction" is just another excuse to allow us to keep on eating.
You can call it whatever you want to call it, but an excuse is an excuse is an excuse. "I'm not responsible, it's my addiction that makes me fat!"
That kind of an excuse you will find in large piles around a cattle feed lot.
Sorry, but each and every one of us is soley responsible for what we choose to do. No "addiction" ever forces us to do anything, and that includes alcohol addiction, drug addiction or eating food.
That's why the "12 Step Programs" are the mostr effective at breaking the cycle of addiction. In all 12 Step Programs, you have to accept responsibility for your own actions.
I was 100% responsible for eating myself into a 412 pound blob.
I was also responsible for CHOOSING to do something about that, and then actually following through.
You can continue to make excuses, and you will fail. Or, you can accept the responsibility for your own CHOICES IN LIFE, decide to change those behaviors, and succeed.
It is NOT easy. You may well have some psychological issues to be dealt with (I did). But, claiming that you are a "food addict" does nothing positive for you at all. It just gives you an excuse to keep on failing.
"I can't help myself, I'm an addict."
It's your choice, make excuses and keep on failing, or accept responsibility and change your life.
I hope that you will accept responsibility for yourself, and change your life.
Hey wait a minute, I never said it was my "addictions" fault that I'm obese...of course its my fault. Did I whine and complain about my abusive childhood and say it was my parents fault? No. I get it that some people blame everybody but themselves but thats not the case with me.
I'm obese because I put too much food in my mouth.
WHY? I DON'T KNOW.
If its so easy, so black an white, why would an RN/substance abuse counselor become 400 lb. obese person?
Why didn't you just simply stop eating before you got so big?
You still haven't given me any help on how to stop.
To tell somebody to stop making excuses and eat less is highly over simplified.
And I've already gone to Over Eaters Anonymous.
I know about addiction (I have been counseling addicts since 1964), and I know about fat. My family is filled with alcoholics (which is why I stopped drinking back in 1969). I have worked (as a professional counselor) with people with just about every form of addiction that is recognized by the APA.
The only "addiction" related to food is that we all have to do it, or we will die. In that sense, we are all "food addicts". But as an addiction per se, so called "Food Addiction" is just another excuse to allow us to keep on eating.
You can call it whatever you want to call it, but an excuse is an excuse is an excuse. "I'm not responsible, it's my addiction that makes me fat!"
That kind of an excuse you will find in large piles around a cattle feed lot.
Sorry, but each and every one of us is soley responsible for what we choose to do. No "addiction" ever forces us to do anything, and that includes alcohol addiction, drug addiction or eating food.
That's why the "12 Step Programs" are the mostr effective at breaking the cycle of addiction. In all 12 Step Programs, you have to accept responsibility for your own actions.
I was 100% responsible for eating myself into a 412 pound blob.
I was also responsible for CHOOSING to do something about that, and then actually following through.
You can continue to make excuses, and you will fail. Or, you can accept the responsibility for your own CHOICES IN LIFE, decide to change those behaviors, and succeed.
It is NOT easy. You may well have some psychological issues to be dealt with (I did). But, claiming that you are a "food addict" does nothing positive for you at all. It just gives you an excuse to keep on failing.
"I can't help myself, I'm an addict."
It's your choice, make excuses and keep on failing, or accept responsibility and change your life.
I hope that you will accept responsibility for yourself, and change your life.
Hey wait a minute, I never said it was my "addictions" fault that I'm obese...of course its my fault. Did I whine and complain about my abusive childhood and say it was my parents fault? No. I get it that some people blame everybody but themselves but thats not the case with me.
I'm obese because I put too much food in my mouth.
WHY? I DON'T KNOW.
If its so easy, so black an white, why would an RN/substance abuse counselor become 400 lb. obese person?
Why didn't you just simply stop eating before you got so big?
You still haven't given me any help on how to stop.
To tell somebody to stop making excuses and eat less is highly over simplified.
And I've already gone to Over Eaters Anonymous.
VSG Aug. 30, 2011 HW 266 SW 249 GW 166 lbs.
On September 17, 2011 at 10:51 PM Pacific Time, J.e.t. wrote:
It's ridiculously over simplified. Underlying emotional issues that cause people to over eat (to the point of obesity) need to be addressed and healed before one can expect anybody to have the long term ability to stop over eating.
VSG Aug. 30, 2011 HW 266 SW 249 GW 166 lbs.
Victim...or VICTOR...we all have to make the choices....seems some really LIKE being victims, like it makes them popular or somethin'...I've never understood it...
Thank you for this post, it's inspriring, it's truthful and it was needed on this forum as well as others....CHOICES people....we're all responsible for our own.
"It doesn't matter how strong your opinions are, if you don't use them for positive change, you ARE, indeed, part of the problem"
This is a powerful post and I appreciate your sharing your story. Very inspirational OM!
But who are you directing this toward? I haven't seen anyway say that they can't live without chocolate, or that they simply can't exercise. I guess I'm missing a lot of posts because I honestly don't see the ones that making all the vets so upset.
That said, I do agree that if you have this surgery or any WLS then there must be something very very deep going on if you still can't adhere to the rules and choose to lose and maintain your weight. This surgery is giving me the opportunity to make the right choices. I can't imagine squandering that. But I accept that there may be people who have problems that are not my own and that I can't imagine.
But who are you directing this toward? I haven't seen anyway say that they can't live without chocolate, or that they simply can't exercise. I guess I'm missing a lot of posts because I honestly don't see the ones that making all the vets so upset.
That said, I do agree that if you have this surgery or any WLS then there must be something very very deep going on if you still can't adhere to the rules and choose to lose and maintain your weight. This surgery is giving me the opportunity to make the right choices. I can't imagine squandering that. But I accept that there may be people who have problems that are not my own and that I can't imagine.
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