One year out, Minus 168 pounds, Reflections & Pix

A year ago today I was sleeved and it was the best thing I could have ever done for myself.  The minute I heard about the sleeve surgery I wanted it.  Within 2 months of even knowing it existed I had it.

Over the past year I've had a lot of rough times (husband had a heart attack, we are separated heading to divorce, going to school, work full time, job change, etc.) and although I was very committed to losing weight, I had a lot of life challenges that made it hard to always eat right and exercise to help my sleeve.  Sometimes I REALLY wanted to exercise and everything seemed to conspire against that.

Yet despite all of that I worked as hard as I could and feel my progress has been amazing.  I feel that so many of the lessons I learned before the sleeve helped me get where I am today and helped me maximize the tool.  Here are some of my reflections:

- For me preparing my food daily and having it ready to go is a must.  This means that all of my choices are easy.  I eat the food I prepared in the amounts I prepared.. a no brainer.  This has been key to my success.  I developed this habit long before the sleeve and it has only been made that much easier by having a sleeve and eating such small amounts.

- Cheese and nuts are binge foods for me, and I still want to over eat them even with the sleeve.  They are very calorically dense and I want to eat as much as I can fit with them because they taste so good to me, and they stall me.  So for now, until I get to my goal weight, I avoid them as much as I can.

I had some times where I struggled with this.. I wasn't in denial that they were a problem for me during this time, but I had major stress and anxiety and wasn't ready to give up my last food crutch and move forward.  I controlled what I could until I changed my focus.

As of now I've had several months where I've had virtually none of these foods.  I do feel as if I could be even lighter if I hadn't had this challenge for many months this past year but I am only human and a work in progress always.

- Measuring my food is critical.  I still have the tendency to want to over eat and overfill my sleeve. So Frisco's advice to under eat and measure has been huge for me.

- I'm low carb abstinent and have been for a while.  I know many people don't understand why I am so strict or find that it doesn't work for them.  It works for me.  It gives me peace and serenity and far from feeling deprived, I feel an amazing sense of freedom from food when I eat this way.

- The mental challenges have been huge for me.  I feel like I look in the mirror sometimes and don't know who I am and how I fit in the world anymore.  The way people interact with me and how I feel about myself has changed so greatly between the weight loss and other changes in my life I feel like I have to get to know myself again every day.

I realize how I see myself and how others see me doesn't really match and it hurts my head some days to try to figure it all out.  But I thrive on challenge and I know it's all part of the process and that I will get there.  I try every day and every change as something to be excited about and not feared and I keep working to redirect my thoughts to handle things that way.

- My feelings about my weight loss are many times ambiguous and I often feel like I'm on a roller coaster of emotions; but the one area that I experience nothing but PURE unadulterated JOY in is just being able to physically move more and move my body.  I love being able to run, play, hike and have a body that can keep up with the demands for adventure that have always been in my head.  Finally what I dream up is not fettered by a body that holds me back from fully experiencing life.

- I exercise as much as I can.  Some days I just want to spend hours in the gym and I am frustrated because there's never enough time.  Some days I just want to go and go and wear my body to the ground and love it.  Other days going to the gym seems like a chore and I make every excuse not to go.  But I do try and workout a lot, albeit inconsistently.  Excercise has definitely helped me with weight loss.

So that's my random reflections for my first year.  And since they say pics or it didn't happen, here are mine:

If you've got this far.. thanks for reading, and thanks everyone on OH for being you.. I have learned so much from you all and enjoy so much sharing in your lives.  Hugs...

Well done, Sublimate!  It's nice to put a "face" w/ your title.  You've done an incredible job.

Keep up the good work.  You'll be @ goal in no time.

I enjoy reading your posts.

Thanks so much Judith! Can't wait to get to goal!  I didn't for a long time believe I'd get there but I'm really starting to believe it now.

You have done amazing! I only hope I can be where you are a year out. You should be so proud of yourself! I am proud for you! Keep up the great work! 

Thank you so much!  I'm happy to share what has worked for me with you so you can have maximum success.  I learned a lot about what I was doing and what worked and didn't work.  In short:

 - always measure

- eat primarily dense lean protein (beef, chicken, fish) in small meals through the day.. with green veggies in small amounts.  the less you eat of other things the better you will do!

- exercise as much as you can.. it helps and makes you feel good!

- drink lots of water

- always have your food prepared.. get in the habit of having things handy

great job!  you've worked your sleave

thank you!

You look beautiful!! Way to go..you're doing fantastic!!

Thank you Miss Dawnie!  You've been very inspiring to me through this journey.. thank you thank you!

 You are doing/have done amazingly!!