OT: Need A Laugh Super ******g Funny!!!
I have a daycare center and currently and doing some staff changes. I sent out an email explaining the changes and asking if anyone wanted their infants nap or meal times changed. One of my best friends babies attends and we are forever talking about how crazy and needy some of these ******g parents are. This is her sarcastic response to my email.
Yes, I would like the following tweaks to be made to Elliot's nap/ eating schedule:
Fruit be fed for mornings, but only during an odd hour and not within 10 minutes BEFORE the hour, unless it is a fruit/granola combo, then it can be fed at quarter to the hour until a quarter past the hour but not before or after that.
Afternoon snack at EXACTLY 1:35 unless she had a 3+ hours nap in the morning, then she should get snack at 1:37 on the dot.
Give her ONLY an odd number off puffs or fruit snacks. If she eats another child's then make sure she eats one more to keep it an odd number.
Afternoon meal should be fed in EXACTLY 25 spoonfuls. If she is especially hungry then make them big spoonfuls. If she is not very hungry then they should be small spoonfuls but she must take EXACTLY 25 bites per meal. I cannot stress the importance of this enough!
Please track and account for her exposure to sun or sunlight (through the window) in minutes and include it on the day sheet.
When putting her down for nap, spin around with her three times and then kiss her feet 6 times (each foot) before laying her down. If she gets fussy, then pick up and repeat. She should always be laid down with her head facing south.
I will also be providing you a list of vocabulary words I would like you to integrate into your conversations with her and the number of times per day each word should be used.
Yes, I would like the following tweaks to be made to Elliot's nap/ eating schedule:
Fruit be fed for mornings, but only during an odd hour and not within 10 minutes BEFORE the hour, unless it is a fruit/granola combo, then it can be fed at quarter to the hour until a quarter past the hour but not before or after that.
Afternoon snack at EXACTLY 1:35 unless she had a 3+ hours nap in the morning, then she should get snack at 1:37 on the dot.
Give her ONLY an odd number off puffs or fruit snacks. If she eats another child's then make sure she eats one more to keep it an odd number.
Afternoon meal should be fed in EXACTLY 25 spoonfuls. If she is especially hungry then make them big spoonfuls. If she is not very hungry then they should be small spoonfuls but she must take EXACTLY 25 bites per meal. I cannot stress the importance of this enough!
Please track and account for her exposure to sun or sunlight (through the window) in minutes and include it on the day sheet.
When putting her down for nap, spin around with her three times and then kiss her feet 6 times (each foot) before laying her down. If she gets fussy, then pick up and repeat. She should always be laid down with her head facing south.
I will also be providing you a list of vocabulary words I would like you to integrate into your conversations with her and the number of times per day each word should be used.
SW 229 
CW 136 
The sad thing is I'm sure she isn't too far off from some of the crazy things you hear. 
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