1 year, 100 lbs gone!
And according to the nice scale I found - I am down 102 LBS in one year.
I will never forget the day I woke up and decided it was now or never. I will never forget seeing the number 420 on the scale. I will never forget the panic that came along with that. I will never forget the first time I tried to go to the gym and I couldn't put my shoes on because my feet were too swollen. I will never forget the first time I actually made it to the gym, got on the treadmill, and couldn't do more than 10 min at 2.5 mph. I will never forget the shame and embarassment of having no clothes to wear to work for a jury trial. I will never forget all of the activities I had to miss out on because I couldn't walk. And most importantly, I will never forget that day when I decided I had enough, and day I decided to change directions.
That was not the day I decided on WLS - it was about 2 weeks after I started watching what I ate and exercising that it even crossed my mine. I started looking into for the first time (before that I knew nothing about WLS other than lapband billboards). When I made that decision, and I started reading, I decided it was something I needed. There was no way I was going from 420lbs to "normal" on my own. I was haunted by the previous WW attempt where I lost about 90 or so lbs, and gained all back in 6 months. And I never looked back. I knew I wanted my BMI to be under 50 at the time of surgery to reduce the risks and complications, and that's what motivated me the most.
And I did that. By changing my habits, my relationship with food, I lost 85 lbs before I went in for surgery. I will be more proud of those 85 lbs I lost pre-op than I will be of the weight I lose with the surgery - I fought a lot of battles, a lot of demons to get those lbs off, but I did it. I know there will be more, but I'm more or less ready now.
I have learned a few things a long the way - I hate the scale. I have my logs of my weekly weigh ins over the months, and I can see my body loves to screw with me - maintaining +/- .02 lbs for a couple weeks and dropping 7-8 lbs at once. I don't need the scale to tell me how i'm doing. My body does its thing, I do mine. Exercise is absoutely 100% required for me. Not because it burns calories and builds muscle mass, but because it gives me goals, it gives me a sense of accomplishment, it keeps my head in the game, and keeps the depression at bay.(and for a while it was just 2 hours I was away and not at home to eat lol) I know I will never feel the same satisfaction from a scale that I felt the day I did my first 5K at 346lbs.
Surgery has been rough. I'm 3 weeks out, and most days I wish I had given it one last attempt without surgery. I'm grateful for the 17lbs that Ive shed since then, but it will take a while for me to truly feel like I did the right thing. But I'm setting aside those feelings for a day to celebrate the new me, and celebrate my accomplishments. I've received so much support and kindness from people here and I'm even more thankful for that.
www.sexyskinnybitch.wordpress.com - my journey to sexy skinny bitch status
11/16/12 - Got my Body by Sauceda - arms, Bl/BA, LBL, thigh lift.
HW 420/ SW 335 /CW 200 85 lbs lost pre-op / 135 post op
~~~~Alison~~~~~
I'm with you on how you feel about surgery now that you've had it. I'm right there. But hopefully some day soon we'll both be feeling great about our decision knowing that it gives us the final tool to take the weight off and keep it off.
Bravo!
5'5" Goal reached, but fighting regain. Back to Basics.
Start Weight 246 Goal Weight 160 Current Weight 183
Starting size: 22, 2x
Current size: 12, L
I know as soon as up out being active again, I will appreciate every lb that is gone since surgery and I'll be happy about this decision.
We're gonna do great - couple more weeks and we should be as good as new :)
www.sexyskinnybitch.wordpress.com - my journey to sexy skinny bitch status
11/16/12 - Got my Body by Sauceda - arms, Bl/BA, LBL, thigh lift.
HW 420/ SW 335 /CW 200 85 lbs lost pre-op / 135 post op
~~~~Alison~~~~~
There's light at the end of the tunnel and that's what gets me through this challenging time!
Go us!
5'5" Goal reached, but fighting regain. Back to Basics.
Start Weight 246 Goal Weight 160 Current Weight 183
Starting size: 22, 2x
Current size: 12, L
www.sexyskinnybitch.wordpress.com - my journey to sexy skinny bitch status
11/16/12 - Got my Body by Sauceda - arms, Bl/BA, LBL, thigh lift.
HW 420/ SW 335 /CW 200 85 lbs lost pre-op / 135 post op
~~~~Alison~~~~~