backhanded NSV...

 So I've had a really great Easter weekend.  Started out on Thursday I tried on my new scrubs (bought them 1 week after surgery cuz of a sale)  I was able to fit into my XL scrub pants!!  I was super stoked about that.  That's down 2 sizes.  My preop scrubs are all 3X.

Then Friday I had to go buy my Easter outfit.  We got the rest of the fam's 2 weeks ago.  The dress I found which was perfect didn't fit.  So my husband suggested going and trying it again.  So I took my spanks and went back and it fit!!  SOOOO happy.  

Colored eggs with the fam on Saturday and made a scavenger hunt for the kiddos for this morning.  Then today we got up, way to early lol, and went to the Son-rise service at church.  Afterwards we had breakfast at church.  I got 3 compliments on my dress and 'how nice it looked on me'  It's been so long since that has happened.  The best one was probably from my ex's mom (my daughter's grandma) and she rarely talks to me.  But said 'I just have to tell you how WONDERFUL you look.  you're face is glowing and you are triming down awesomely!' then she says 'if I didn't know based on you're happy face I'd think you were pregnant, but you don't "look" pregnant' lmao

So this evening we went to my hubby's family for dinner and they called his grandma and she was asking about my surgery (she was on speaker phone, which I don't think she realized)  First off I was already a bit upset because my husband told his family about surgery even though I asked him not to.  So I'm assuming his sister told his grandma, since he hasn't talked to her since Christmas and I didn't know about doing this at that time.  But anyway he was explaining certain aspects of it all and she responds with...."well it's about time she did something, I really don't know why she let herself go like that and why she couldn't just get up and lose the weight already.  But I am happy for you, the last thing you need honey is to be attached to someone who just sits around and gets bigger and bigger"

I'm sure I don't have to explain how hurt I feel.  The worst part though was the embarassment.  It just burns inside of me.  My husband didn't say anything except 'well it's really not like that'  but he told me later he just didn't want to cause a scene in front of everyone (his dad, sister, brother in law and all the kids)  I do agree with him, and I'm not upset with him.  I've known since day one that his mom and grandma are obsessed with weight. Making inappropriate comments at inappropriate times, but this was the worst ever.

All in all it was a great weekend.  I guess in every perfect day there is always a dark spot. 

 That's rough. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I completely understand the embarassment that caused you.  But you're doing something about your weight and that's all that really matters. Keep your head up and keep kicking ass!

Ewww she's gross!!!  Blah, that would upset me!  And I think that what she said about ME would be secondary.  The ewww part is - wow, how do you up and say stuff like that - it's one thing to think it, another to say it - and then to say it to a spouse - all she needs is positive input, yknow?  Not to encourage any feelings of negativity.  And I feel like that's what she was doing.  It's that kind of thought process that just brings forward gossip and bleh - it's like people who bond through hatred and negativity.  I dunno, that gets my goat!  Sorry to had to hear it, bleh, and sorry to that woman that that is the thought process she lives through each day!

I am glad you had such a good week end.  It is too bad that grandma and MIL have such a pissy attitude, but HEY... thank God you don't have to live with either of them!

When people are like this it just shows they are fools.  Shake their dust off your feet and know that you are just fine no matter what size and just as worthy of respect and dignity no matter what size.

One of my husband's sisters was always making comments about how HUGE I was and introduced me to a new family member as :Miss Piggy" once.  I just calmly walked out of the house and got in the car.  My husband and HER husband both told her off...  Then my husband and I wenty home (in another city).  My mother in law tried to smooth things over by telling me that it was because my sister in law left school when she was in the 9th grade and is not smart!!!  I know other people who dropped out of school who are more intellegent than some college grads... one thing I do know, no one else I have ever known was ever stupid enough to hurt and embarass someone like that woman did me that day.  I got even by genuinely treating her just as nice as I always had. 

The funny thing is... I only weighed about 175 then!


Oh yeah... she did apologise... more than 10 years later.  LOL!!!!!!

I do hope grandma finds out that she was on the speaker phone and you heard... a little humble pie never hurt anyone.

"well it's about time she did something, I really don't know why she let herself go like that and why she couldn't just get up and lose the weight already.  But I am happy for you, the last thing you need honey is to be attached to someone who just sits around and gets bigger and bigger"

What a nasty, venomous old hag!

I'm sorry but that's just something someone (esp in the family) should never say -  even if they think its a private conversation.

I would hire an old guy, a couple of women and a camera man...Have them knock on the old bags door with a big "Publishers Clearing House Check"...Then break the news...Sorry! Danielle just thought you could use a good laugh!
Or at least do the classic "flaming bag-o-dog crap" on her doorstep...

Glad the rest of your day was good.

J

 Hahaha. I agree with this.

Ouch! to those compliments. But you are awesome, and as long as you know that, you're ok! :)

I can't wait to have my surgery so people can start saying weird things to me and hubby!

Jenni

I've been told a couple times "it's so sad, you have such a pretty face..."  People think that's a compliment?!  eesh.  Ignore the hurtful things she said and rise above it, although I would let a hint be dropped that you HAD heard the comments.  I agree that the taste of crow, in this case, may just be what the Dr. ordered.

I don't mean to go all introspective on you, but honestly if you can step WAY back and look, this is just one more person who doesn't really see people for who they are.  You know who you are inside and out, and it's the inside that makes a person.  Often people are cruel because they haven't tasted suffering yet.  You have suffered I think from the cruelties of being overweight, and it will give you a more compassionate heart than others who haven't.  Not much solace when the stings of such hurtful comments nip at you.  You can lose all of your weight and maintain it, and still people like that will continue to be cruel and negative, its a reflection of a part of who they are inside. 

WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!! The things people say. Is that why they say IGNORANCE IS BLISS.....because she was too ignorant to even realize how hurtful and discusting she was? Your a better woman than I am ..........Although I am a peacekeeper.........I don't think I could have held my tongue. You are awesome! Aside from that incident sounds like you really had a wonderful Easter.....I'm glad.