Do you have that one thing

Skinny jeans with boots were a must, did that one. Clingy sweaters and tops without looking like a can of busted open Grands Biscuits, did that one. I could care less about swim suits since I have to avoid major sun exposure. I have an aversion to armpits (women's armpits especially), and could care less if I ever go sleeveless or wear a tank without a cover up. Hooker boots were indeed on my list of "must haves" since my calves were so enormous and I refused to purchase those fake leather fatty boots with the elastic in them to accommodate my fatness.

Victoria Secret's is so over-rated. Sorry, but I lost 145lbs, and dropped down to normal bra sizes. After being sized there, and freaking out the lady who measured me that thought she had seen all boob shapes, sizes, issues, she was literally speechless when she measured me braless (I still had my shirt on), but in their entire store, entire line, I tried on 18, yes 18 different bras, every style, 3 different size combinations, and walked out of there with body spray and lotion because not a single effin one of their bras fit me properly. My boobs looked like rolled up scrotums shoved into their bras, or my side boobs and excess skin under my arms folded over the side strap. NOT what I'd expect out of a $50-$60 bra. I'll stick to $5-$7 maidenform, bali and Izod bras from Ross and TjMaxx since they fit, make my boobs look like actual boobs.

I think my disdain for VS is simply, I could give 2 poops what I'm wearing under my clothes. No one else sees them, I'm not going to be flashing anyone, and I don't get that whole "I feel so sexy because I have slinky undies on". Undergarments are simply functional in my opinion, and pretty much just extra laundry for me wash, dry and fold.. I don't feel like I'm some seductress of humping prowess because I have some ruched back panties on. I think it's because I'm just too simple for lingerie, or the fact that the sharpei jowl type wrinkles at the bottom of my butt cheeks can't be contained, and I don't see any sense in drawing attention to them LOL.

I wear cute little Joe Boxer hipster panties with cute little sayings and patterns on them, but I buy them on clearance and they fit properly. So that's the win win situation for me.