OT: Polite but stubborn child (long)

I have a daughter who will be 2 next weekend. She's a card. Very loving and sweet.....most of the time. She's also very loud, very stubborn, opinionated, and very hyper. The drs all say "run around and wear her out and that will calm her down." HA! Did you get that? HA! Not my child. I take her walking at the mall, playing at the park, playing at the Preschool Playplace in the Lynnhaven Mall, dance with her at home, walks around the neighborhood, etc and yet while she may wear out long enough for her nap, she's never a calm child. Some days, I pull my hair out because the only thing she sits in one place for (notice I did not say sits still for) is her Teletubbies videos and the Doodlebops (a disney show about hyper-real musicians). And even that's for no more than a half hour at a time. One thing I will say is that she's polite. We went for breakfast at IHOP and when the waitress brought her chocolate milk, she took it with a smile and said "Tint too" (thank you). And when the milk spilled a little (she's only 2), she took a napkin from me and cleaned it up, then handed me napkin to put in the garbage for her, saying "peaz" (please). The waitress was entranced that this little child, barely 22 lbs, so tiny, was being so polite and well-behaved. I was too, but I was wondering where the super rowdy rugrat I live with had gone to. I've made a comment once before about how she drives me crazy and sometimes I wonder why I had a child. I actually had someone tell me shortly afterwards that I should never have been a parent and that child services should be called on me, just for that comment. I love my child and yes, I wonder what my life would have been without her, but I also wonder how I could ever have lived this long without having this wonderful love from a child in my life. She drives me insane some days and I don't get to post like I'd like because she wants to be in my lap and "helping" mommy type. She's super hyper and refuses diaper changes. I have to chase her down for those and then literally hold her down to get the new one on her. She's ready for potty training but refuses to use either the big, grown up potty or her little Winnie the Pooh potty Nana bought her. I'm reading books on childcare, books on potty training, books on tantrums (yes, we have those too), books on getting her to sleep through the night (only 2 times in the past 2 years have I been able to sleep more than 4 hours in a row because she has night terrors and has to have mommy by her side). I read and I read and I attempt, but she's very stubborn. I used to be afraid of her throwing tantrums in stores because of the looks people give you who think you must be beating your child with an invisible stick. Lately though, all I get are sympathetic looks when she decides she wants three purses in Walmart and you won't let her have all three. The point of this ramble is: My lovable, loving, sweet, crazy, hyper, stubborn, polite, wonderful, evil child is driving me insane and keeping me sane all at once. I wouldn't have missed this for all the beans in Columbia. Do I want more? NO! But let's just enjoy the silence now, while she's sleeping. LOL. Tonya 405/379/273/180 (high/surgery/now/goal)

Hi Tonya, I posted a longer response to your entry on the Main Board. Hang in there! Love ya', Lois -45 lbs

AWWW Tonya!! I so remember those days. Not that my children could ever be classified as hyper, but stubborn and willful, and basically, just 2 year olds. They are their own little people. LOL I can tell you 3 is gonna make a HUGE difference for you. Potty training comes.............you're probably just going through the motions at 2, so don't stress over it yet. She will be able to talk to you and express herself so much better, and maybe, hopefully the tantrums will chill a little. My last daughter used to beat the crap out of my middle daughter at that age. She'd grab her by the hair and swing her around. LOLOL (23 months apart.) Ok, so then comes 4...............they are so much better............you can put them in school, and have some YOU time. I had mine in the YMCA, and worked out while they were in school..............made friendships I still have to this day. Then 5, off to full day kindergarten!! HURRAY!!!!!!!!!!! Of course, now I have the pre-pubesent (sp) 11 year old boy who is a total hellion. Smartest kid in the whole world, scary smart, and brings home 3 D's in all core subjects on his report card. If it's not 1 thing it's another. Oh the joys of parenthood, but I wouldn't change it for the world!!! Chin up, it really does get better!!! XOXOXOOXOXOOXOo Sharon

. G'morning Tonya ~ Your post coulda' been written by ME - er, well, it woulda' been 25 years ago, of course, since my son is now 27. Trust me, you're NOT alone in your thoughts, you're just honest and brave enough to voice 'em. I was the same way and ta' hell with anyone who thought that made me "evil or a bad parent" ...verbalizing RELEASES tention not to mention you might even be able to pick up a few pointers along the way in keeping your sanity. Good grief, we're HUMAN and we're PARENTS, we're not SAINTS! We're allowed to feel frazzled and flusterpated, once in awhile. Bottomline, we LOVE our children and we'd never ever trade them in or omit them from our lives. Show me a perfect, non hyper, non stubborn, non verbal, non screaming CHILD and I'll betcha they bought it at "Toys R Us" Oh - your final line cracked me up too! Once again, I coulda written it - and for sure, I LIVED IT! I had ONE child (for a reason) and that's ALL I wanted, tried it, did it, bought the 'newborn' T-shirts, color me done!!! btw - if anyone wants to call "child services" on me and cart my son away? Feel free! He's 27 and won't require a child seat! Hugs ~ Lei .

Tonya I know what you are going through I have a 25 lb 10 month old that is part octopus. He is walking and now running through the house 16 hours a day. He is in bed by 9pm and awake at 5am. He refuses to nap no matter how much I try. He has to touch and taste everything. No sooner I pry him a way from beating up the TV he is rummaging through my purse and getting into everything within sight. I agree one is enough especially at my old age of 32. But he is my world and I wouldn't change a thing about him. Kids are the best exercise equipment. Jenn

Tonya.....Like Lei said, this could have been written by me!!! But 25 years ago...I have 2 boys and a girl and the girl had me going more than both boys. I love them all and miss them soooo much as they all have their own lives now and would love to have that craziness back again if only for a day....yup, just a day would do it. hehe....Just try to enjoy it because they grow up so fast and you will miss it all. I do sympathize with you, I know what you are going through. Hugs, Betsy

Tonya, We should get our kiddo's together. Your daughter sounds like a mini me of my 3 almost 4 year old Megan. We used to laugh that she would be able to climb glass if we let her. She's starting to calm down a little but there's still a ways for her to go. So I guess there might be hope in your future...and as for potty training, the thing that worked for us was the potty time video and song. She just couldn't get enough of that stupid song and we all had to sing it every time she went to the bathroom. Let me know if you want to borrow it. Liz --RNY 12-28-05, down 35 lbs.