Surviving the Holidays and Big Plate Blues ..
I wanted to share with you all the topic that our Support Group Director asked us to take part in .
On the Main Board .. Eric Klein posted about how we handle Thanksgiving and the Holidays.
I see that there are a lot of newly post ops .. and pre-ops . I hope that this post helps you .. and I hope it creates dialog among us to assist others as we go through the holidays once again .
Here is what I posted .
Oh Eric ... what a great subject for me ... WHY .. I am a southern gal from a big family .
Here is my story ... and all of my suggestions ... I have had plenty of time to beat the Turkey Day Blues ...
My first Thanksgiving arrived with much fear , sorrow and Success ! .
I am always the one that cooks the meal .. I come from a very large Southern family , who would not be happy with just a WLS friendly meal .
When TG arrived my first I was just 6 months post op . By that time I had already lost 100 pounds , feeling great .. but scared to death of the up coming holidays.
In our family we do the whole nine .. Turkey , Dressing , Mac and Cheese .. you know the foods that get us all in trouble .
I did manage to cook the entire meal .. at times I forgot that I could not just " taste a little " to see if it needed this or that .. and I messed up .. I found myself at the toilet a couple times , and dumped like there was no tomorrow . I will not lie to you .. It was hard as heck to do this . But I did it .. How did I overcome the BIG PLATE SYNDROME .. I was able to find a kiddie plate from my niece and I used it .. I looked at the table and picked out 5 things I really wanted to taste .. and I did it ..
Now for the desert table .. I had all the big guns out .. PUMPKIN PIE , BANANA PUDDING , CHERRY CHEESE CAKE .. you name it .. it was there .. I made a deal with the WLS devil if you could say that .. and I picked ONE .. desert to taste .. and it was the Pumpkin pie . These 2 bites of pie where the best ever .. and I did cut myself off .. as with all the dumping from the tasting .. I knew better .
As the years went on ,, I was able to add weight loss friendly substitutes . Such as using 2 % cheese and milk for the mac and cheese ... Using Splenda for deserts .. ( Shhh don't tell them .. as they have no idea " )
I can tell the newly post ops and those contemplating surgery .. you can do this .. you can survive the holidays, but you must arm yourself with tools and go into remembering that this is your new life .. and it is what it is .. and there is no going back . The choices that you make have to be ones that you can live with , In saying that .. also remember that we do falter .. and we must be willing to be accountable .. and work hard to make it right .
Here are some things that I do now that have helped me along the way .
1. Try to use a small plate . This will keep you from taking part in the " BIG PLATE " part of the holidays. I know from past days as an Obese person .. I had to have everything on my plate. If you choose the things you really want .. You can beat the Big Plate .
2. Take your time to enjoy this meal . Remember to chew your food . Savor all the flavors and smells that the holidays bring .
3. If you are the one cooking the meal , DO NOT TASTE THE FOOD .. get someone else to be the taster for you . This will keep you from getting too full and from dumping on things that may have to much sugar in it .
4. Find recipes that are WLS friendly . I know for me I can substitute 2% cheese and milk for my gravies and sauces . Also use Splenda or a sugar substitute where you can . I know most of my deserts do not taste any differently . And they all love them .
5. Remember the rules about eating and drinking . I always wait 45 min to an hour before I drink anything before a meal .. and at least 30 to 45 after. I want to get the most bang for the buck when I eat .
6. If you go into the holidays feeling depressed , sad or fearful , find a buddy . .or a support group leader you can call and talk to . I know for my group .. I offer my telephone number and email for those that are struggling . It helps to know that we are all going through this .. and talking to someone can help you get through this .
7. Enjoy your time with your loved ones. Food is always the main focus at the holidays, but remember to enjoy the time with those that are there .
8. This was a big one for me .. I had so many people come up to me and say .. Oh my Gosh .. you can eat that ? Are you going to get sick .. ? I thought you Gastric bypass people could not eat food like this . Do not let them scare you . Be prepared to stand up for yourself .. defend your decision to have the surgery .. and never be ashamed that you did this . When they start in on me with these questions .. I answer them with the truth . Can I eat this .. YES .. if you are making good food choices .. what could be wrong with what is on your plate. And if you choose to have a bite of potatoes .. it is a bite .. not the whole bowl .. right ? So many have watched me over the years as I eat .. and at first it was annoying .. and it hurt . but now .. I laugh .. and tell them that this was the best thing I ever did .. and I feel great .. !! I tell them now that Food is my fuel .. not my Falter.
9. If you are visiting at someone Else's house for the holidays, I have found that calling ahead to let them know that you are sugar and fat sensitive... and ask if you could bring some WLS dishes with you . Most times we see people that share in the food making .. each person brings a dish . Trust me .. you can wow them with some really great healthy recipes . Do not be scared to ask .
10. If you are newly post op .. and you are feeling depressed .. alone .. and feel that no one understands what you are going through .. and you just cannot enjoy yourself .. STOP .. be prepared to look at the food choices very carefully . This is your new life now .. and you are the one in control. Remember protein first , veggies second .. and if you have room .. and this is a big one .. IF YOU HAVE ROOM .. chose a carb .. ( Sweet potatoes are better for you than White potatoes ) Do not let the food rule you .. you rule the food . If you are really leery of eating .. take some things you can enjoy with you in your purse . I have seen others in my group take protein bars , and shakes .. and when people asked them why they are not eating .. tell them if you wish to share .. your story .. and that you are doing what will keep you healthy and safe . If you choose not to tell people at the event that you had WLS... tell them you are just not that hungry .. and are truly enjoying your time with everyone at the party ..
These days Thanksgiving ... Christmas .. New Years .. are one day out of the year . Are they scary to us .. to people who have fought food all of our lives. You bet they are .. but you have to be strong .. you have to be bold and proud of all that you have done to take the steps to beat this disease they call Obesity . Remember tomorrow is another day .. and the treadmill awaits you ! LOL ..
Eric .. I could go on and an on about this .. but I will leave you with the above .
I am 5.6 years post op . I am proud of all that I have accomplished through the years. There have been some holidays that I just wished I could crawl away and never take part . But I am what holds the holidays together in my family .. And I cannot let them down . So I had to put on my big girl Southern britches .. and just do it .
If there is anyone out here who would like recipe suggestions for the holidays... I have tons of ideas . I would love to share them with you .
Thanks for allowing me to tell my story .. it is one that we all need to think about .
Take care .. and again .. Thanks for all you do and have done for us . !!
Natalie ..
aka .. Tink
On the Main Board .. Eric Klein posted about how we handle Thanksgiving and the Holidays.
I see that there are a lot of newly post ops .. and pre-ops . I hope that this post helps you .. and I hope it creates dialog among us to assist others as we go through the holidays once again .
Here is what I posted .
Oh Eric ... what a great subject for me ... WHY .. I am a southern gal from a big family .
Here is my story ... and all of my suggestions ... I have had plenty of time to beat the Turkey Day Blues ...
My first Thanksgiving arrived with much fear , sorrow and Success ! .
I am always the one that cooks the meal .. I come from a very large Southern family , who would not be happy with just a WLS friendly meal .
When TG arrived my first I was just 6 months post op . By that time I had already lost 100 pounds , feeling great .. but scared to death of the up coming holidays.
In our family we do the whole nine .. Turkey , Dressing , Mac and Cheese .. you know the foods that get us all in trouble .
I did manage to cook the entire meal .. at times I forgot that I could not just " taste a little " to see if it needed this or that .. and I messed up .. I found myself at the toilet a couple times , and dumped like there was no tomorrow . I will not lie to you .. It was hard as heck to do this . But I did it .. How did I overcome the BIG PLATE SYNDROME .. I was able to find a kiddie plate from my niece and I used it .. I looked at the table and picked out 5 things I really wanted to taste .. and I did it ..
Now for the desert table .. I had all the big guns out .. PUMPKIN PIE , BANANA PUDDING , CHERRY CHEESE CAKE .. you name it .. it was there .. I made a deal with the WLS devil if you could say that .. and I picked ONE .. desert to taste .. and it was the Pumpkin pie . These 2 bites of pie where the best ever .. and I did cut myself off .. as with all the dumping from the tasting .. I knew better .
As the years went on ,, I was able to add weight loss friendly substitutes . Such as using 2 % cheese and milk for the mac and cheese ... Using Splenda for deserts .. ( Shhh don't tell them .. as they have no idea " )
I can tell the newly post ops and those contemplating surgery .. you can do this .. you can survive the holidays, but you must arm yourself with tools and go into remembering that this is your new life .. and it is what it is .. and there is no going back . The choices that you make have to be ones that you can live with , In saying that .. also remember that we do falter .. and we must be willing to be accountable .. and work hard to make it right .
Here are some things that I do now that have helped me along the way .
1. Try to use a small plate . This will keep you from taking part in the " BIG PLATE " part of the holidays. I know from past days as an Obese person .. I had to have everything on my plate. If you choose the things you really want .. You can beat the Big Plate .
2. Take your time to enjoy this meal . Remember to chew your food . Savor all the flavors and smells that the holidays bring .
3. If you are the one cooking the meal , DO NOT TASTE THE FOOD .. get someone else to be the taster for you . This will keep you from getting too full and from dumping on things that may have to much sugar in it .
4. Find recipes that are WLS friendly . I know for me I can substitute 2% cheese and milk for my gravies and sauces . Also use Splenda or a sugar substitute where you can . I know most of my deserts do not taste any differently . And they all love them .
5. Remember the rules about eating and drinking . I always wait 45 min to an hour before I drink anything before a meal .. and at least 30 to 45 after. I want to get the most bang for the buck when I eat .
6. If you go into the holidays feeling depressed , sad or fearful , find a buddy . .or a support group leader you can call and talk to . I know for my group .. I offer my telephone number and email for those that are struggling . It helps to know that we are all going through this .. and talking to someone can help you get through this .
7. Enjoy your time with your loved ones. Food is always the main focus at the holidays, but remember to enjoy the time with those that are there .
8. This was a big one for me .. I had so many people come up to me and say .. Oh my Gosh .. you can eat that ? Are you going to get sick .. ? I thought you Gastric bypass people could not eat food like this . Do not let them scare you . Be prepared to stand up for yourself .. defend your decision to have the surgery .. and never be ashamed that you did this . When they start in on me with these questions .. I answer them with the truth . Can I eat this .. YES .. if you are making good food choices .. what could be wrong with what is on your plate. And if you choose to have a bite of potatoes .. it is a bite .. not the whole bowl .. right ? So many have watched me over the years as I eat .. and at first it was annoying .. and it hurt . but now .. I laugh .. and tell them that this was the best thing I ever did .. and I feel great .. !! I tell them now that Food is my fuel .. not my Falter.
9. If you are visiting at someone Else's house for the holidays, I have found that calling ahead to let them know that you are sugar and fat sensitive... and ask if you could bring some WLS dishes with you . Most times we see people that share in the food making .. each person brings a dish . Trust me .. you can wow them with some really great healthy recipes . Do not be scared to ask .
10. If you are newly post op .. and you are feeling depressed .. alone .. and feel that no one understands what you are going through .. and you just cannot enjoy yourself .. STOP .. be prepared to look at the food choices very carefully . This is your new life now .. and you are the one in control. Remember protein first , veggies second .. and if you have room .. and this is a big one .. IF YOU HAVE ROOM .. chose a carb .. ( Sweet potatoes are better for you than White potatoes ) Do not let the food rule you .. you rule the food . If you are really leery of eating .. take some things you can enjoy with you in your purse . I have seen others in my group take protein bars , and shakes .. and when people asked them why they are not eating .. tell them if you wish to share .. your story .. and that you are doing what will keep you healthy and safe . If you choose not to tell people at the event that you had WLS... tell them you are just not that hungry .. and are truly enjoying your time with everyone at the party ..
These days Thanksgiving ... Christmas .. New Years .. are one day out of the year . Are they scary to us .. to people who have fought food all of our lives. You bet they are .. but you have to be strong .. you have to be bold and proud of all that you have done to take the steps to beat this disease they call Obesity . Remember tomorrow is another day .. and the treadmill awaits you ! LOL ..
Eric .. I could go on and an on about this .. but I will leave you with the above .
I am 5.6 years post op . I am proud of all that I have accomplished through the years. There have been some holidays that I just wished I could crawl away and never take part . But I am what holds the holidays together in my family .. And I cannot let them down . So I had to put on my big girl Southern britches .. and just do it .
If there is anyone out here who would like recipe suggestions for the holidays... I have tons of ideas . I would love to share them with you .
Thanks for allowing me to tell my story .. it is one that we all need to think about .
Take care .. and again .. Thanks for all you do and have done for us . !!
Natalie ..
aka .. Tink
Proud Obesity Help Bariatric Life Coach
Proud Obesity Help Support Group Leader
Fighting Daily the Disease We Call Obesity !
www.obesityhelp.com/group/LifeStartsWLS08
www.vawlsevents.com
Helping Others Find Their Way to a Life They Deserve!