Does our board need a shake-up?

You are right that majority of the posters here are RNY patients and then lap band. and then VSG. 

However, I wish there were more DS patients here.  There are not really many DS surgeons in VA.  And there is little knowledge of the DS around here.  It would be GREAT to have our DS patients post here to give those people looking for surgery a well rounded knowledge on all the available options.  A lot of people do not post and just lurk on here and without the DS being openly discussed here, there may be a person who may not learn about a surgery that is just right for them.

Well, there is only one DS surgeon in the state of VA (Dr. Elariny in Fairfax), and he is considered out-of-network no matter what kind of insurance you have, so he can cost a pretty penny. When I see newbies come on here asking about a surgeon or the classic "band versus RNY," I always recommend they at least attend Dr. Elariny's free information session to learn about ALL their options.

Love you!  Miss you!  Hi Jill & Melissa & others I have missed also.  I will try to do better.  I know I have only been half participating, mostly due to my own crazy life but I will work on it.  :)

Well, I have been mostly a lurker, I must be intimidated by all of you beautiful women .  :)  I am  a newbie  and have found that I have not had many questions so far.  I have been very blessed to have an uneventful surgery and recovery so far.  I am coming up on my first fill and am sure things will change up then and I will have some questions.  I would love to get to know more of you , other than few that I have communicated with.  I am going to try to participate more

Tim

I think it's great that you want to get everyone talking, but please don't think so poorly of all lurkers.   When I first found this web site, I was just starting to think about WLS.  I  wanted to find out what experiences others had.   I didn't have specific questions at that time, because I didn't know much about WLS.  So I just lurked and read posts and got educated little by little.   Eventually after I started to understand things more and spoke with the doctors, I was able to join in and ask questions.  Please remember this is an open web site, many people from different situations come here to learn.   Some may be friends of family of people seeking WLS, who just don't understand why.   Some are people who are just trying to figure out if WLS is really a good hope, or just another weight loss fad.   These people may just lurk for a while, trying to understand what it is all about.   I support those people.   I think it's very important that more people learn about WLS and come to understand it's not the easy way out, and it is sometimes a last hope.  I know I did not really feel comfortable posting to the site, until I had actually started my journey.   I felt I might ask stupid questions, and I found that many of the question I had, had already been posted by others.   I hope you can think kindly of some of us lurkers in the future.  Remember, one of those lurkers might be a very desperate and shy person, dipping there foot in the water as it were.  Give them time, and they may feel more comfortable joining in.

Having said that, I am glad to have seen so many old-timers posting to this subject.   Yeah for you, you really are an inspiration and big sister/brother to all of us newbies.  Thank you so much for your experience and advice, it has helped me tremendously.

Hi ppetzing,

Your reply is in line with a lot of my thinking. Its all about learning & observing & hopefully moving towards what is right for ourselves. Again, we never know how our words are impacting someone else as well as our experiences and situations. I support lurkers as well. We have to be open to suggestion and take the good with the bad. I agree with giving time as well. Patience & understanding are paramount. I hope you'll post more often. :)

All best!

Good am,

I've read this post, replies & took the pm to think over how I wanted to respond. For me, simply put, I've been working the Steps (12 Steps) & part of my working through that meant I needed to step back and see the direction in which my life was heading. I'll admit to being neglectful more to myself than anyone. So, I won't be giving an apology for taking time for me. A very valuable lesson learned is that I've got to take care of ME before I can truly intend on helping/taking care of others.

Fixer/peacemaker will always be me but I've learned and am still learning to set boundaries. They are incredibly vital to my sobriety and life in general. I've been tending to the weeds in my own backyard. Its easy to get caught up in the goings on of others and forgoing managing my own life. Then when everything creeps up I'm unprepared & it causes more stress. That's not working out for me.

Each of us has priorities and until we can put those in an order in which benefits us and those around us its just an unhealthy situation to continue trying when you don't have the full strength and tact to do so. I backed away for some of the same reasons others have/did. There is nothing wrong with taking a break and regrouping. Its makes us stronger when we can face our demons & come out healthier, happier and more inclined to give more meaningful support and encouragement.

At the same time, I admit there are times when I've needed to reach out and/or accept support but I've had to find my way in doing so. Its not an easy thing for me. I do know that to get more order back into my life I have to be 3 important things: OPEN, WILLING & HONEST. If I compromise any one or all of those 3 things its an injustice to myself and others.

I've been a part of this site for several years & have for the most part continued to be an active member more often than not. I absolutely value and enjoy most of the posts/replies and love that I STILL learn things all the time & that's important to me. I really enjoy being able to learn others and see their experiences through their eyes. That I might see things in a newer, better, different or AHA way makes me feel very hopeful.

I've always been appreciative of the support I've received & truth be told even during some of the negative times and negative posts/replies I've received have helped to shape me into a better, stronger, more determined woman. I intend on stopping in more frequently to post & reply (as I have been in the previous weeks to this). 

Something that springs to mind immediately for me after having read this post & its current replies is something I've been repeating time and again to myself in light of all I've been working through. Bruises heal. Words are everlasting and take much more time to heal from. I'm all for being opinionated, blunt, honest & to the point. That being said, I also know that my words need to symbolize how I'd want to be spoken to as well. I want my words to be that of healing, support, understanding, acceptance, encouragement, faith & hope. I know that in life I have and will face negativity & words will play a role in all that. I also know that I get to choose what I say & how I say it.

Thanks Ann for posting this. I've got so much more going on in my head. Just going to leave my reply at this for now.

I LURK!!  I got my band less than a month ago, I have been walking these halls since about Oct.  Much has been learned and much more to learn.  I don't post much here because I just don't seem to react to things like other people.   I read so much about all the pain and problems people had, and everything for me has been smooth.  I know it's still early,  I got "tired & weak" for the first time last week, almost 3 weeks after.  I will stay, I visit 1-2 times a day.  As I go further I might have more to add, but for now I'm just getting my questions answered.  I try not to repeat what someone else has asked so I search around before I post.   My other thing is I can't follow directions, I know I have already done some things wrong but I am continuning to drop 1-2 lbs perweek and I have a fill on he 13th.  I will look at that as my starting point and try to do better with my instructions.  Hope all the pros come back to help us out cause I know I will need it.  I am not one for meetings, don't do to good with up close and personal; but I love the "contact" and fast response I can find here.

Wow!  What an amazing turnout!  I was doing pretty good responding to each post, but ya'll have popped in quicker than I can keep up.  At least  I accomplished what I set out to do which was to encourge the quiet to speak up, to ask the old timers to come back, the lurkers to come out of the shadows.

I don't remember who brought it up, I think it was Ppetzing, as well as input from Kat...but thanks for giving me food for thought with regard to lurkers.  I appologize if I sounded mean about them.  I recognize that some are feeling things out.  And I know that they will never all jump in here.  But I DID know that some of them were folks that USED to post rather than just read, & it was them I was trying to draw out initially.  I am tickled to see that so many who HAVE been lurking, are now feeling comfortable enough to participate even if only a little bit at first.  Believe me when I say that once you jump in & start actively participating, you will get caught up in the excitement of it all & pretty soon you'll wonder what took you so long...lol.  The bottom line is that I am not here to twist anyone's arm...we're all grown people capable of making our own decisions, & I totally respect that.  I just want to encourage you & welcome you into the fold.  I hope to challenge some of you to break the mold of being "invisible" which, for many, has been the norm for them...sadly another stigma set onto overweight people thanks to society.  Losing weight & body change are important, startling transformations, but so is breaking the mold that kept you down for too long.  So it is with affection that I encourage any of you that this applies to to step out of the shadows, spread your beautiful wings, & fly with us.

I am very excited that things are once again cooking on all burners.  I guess we DID need to be shaken up a little.

Is my reason for being MIA good enough for now?  I am just checking out a few highlights at the moment...I only have a few moments but please know I WILL be back in full force as soon as I feel up to it again.  Right now I need to get a schedule going and catch up on sleep before I am any good to anyone.  I do miss you all!