6 weeks out today- Reflections

Boy, has this been a journey so far.  Being the weight I was before surgery, before my journey, knowing in my life I have conquered so muh and have some far.  Growing up, I was going to be the problem child.  No one throught I would acomplish anything is life.  Expectations for me, there were none.  I didn't think so either.  At age 18 before I meet my husband, I didn't see my furture, it was dark.  Was it him who changed me?  No, it was me.  At age 21 I went through a very traumatic event in my life that caused me to look at myself.  I have spoken about this before.  That was my turning point.  It took a couple of years, additonal kid later, facing death in its face that things started rolling into motion.  By age 26, and 3 years of hard work, I graduated with my BBA.  First person in the family with a college education.  In that two years I have worked hard in my career and almost doubled my salary in that time period.  I am half way through my MBA with a 3.83 GPA.  I have overcame so much and pushed through to take control of my life while battling ADD every day and bouts of depression.  I will not be held down. 

I never wanted this surgery, I wanted to acomplish this by myself.  Finally in one of my thearapy session, I cam to the realization I needed help.  Just assistance, and this is what it is, assistance.  I still have to work my butt off.  I will concur my wieght and my health and this tool will only help me.  That is how I started seeing RNY.

So now that I am 6 weeks out.  What have I seen.  No diabetic meds.  Down a shoe size.  clothes fitting me better.  Clothes that didn't fit before now are.  I actually LOVE the GYM when I used to loathe it. I feel wonderful going.  I was looking in the mirror at my kangaroo pouch and was wishing it was going away faster.  Alas, it is not.  But then turned to the side in the mirror, My back is almost flat!!!  As I come to those stalls or down periods, I reflect back to how far I have come in this past 6 week.  I look at my list at motivation and remind myself, why I did this and where I want to be.

I think though, the biggest change and the one that brings tears in my eyes is seeing how this effects my family.  My Sweet Justice, I worried about her weight and complusive eating. I have work hard with her to help teach her healthy eating. I was not the best role model.  Now my daughter comes to me with food still on her plate, like she did last night.  Mom this is so good, but I am full now and I do not want to eat until my stomach hurts. (used to be an everyday occurance)  Of course my Princess Amirah has always been aboard and I have little problems with her, but still educate.  My hard headed Saji, still needs work, he like carrots though!! YEAH!!!  But my husband.  The man who I feared him reaching the age of 30 because of his high BP and Cholesterol would leave me in death has changed.  He is eating veggies adn fish!!! I have noticed he is getting the smaller plates and eating smaller portions.  Yesterday he ate off of Saji Truck plate!! 

I still have challenges, such as fighting my snacking desires.  But I know it will be a triumphit acomplishment one day.  And each I try harder and harder.

I LOVE me.  I love me from the inside out. I embrace who I am, both emotionally and physically.

Hey Melissa,

THIS is another example of WHY I still come here each and every day even when I'm having the CRAPPIEST, deepest, darkest moments in my life and I read sometimes 3 or 4 times to let it all sink all, all that others are seeing, experiencing, feeling, learning and so much more. Its incredible the commonalities many of us share in this journey. I see so much of me in so many others and feel so blessed to get to share in others journey's and have them share in mine. Its a tremendous amount of courage and determination to post things for others to see and even though almost all of us have been there or will be how comforting it is to know we don't have to go things alone. 

I have seen the wonderful changes in my buggas as well with eating habits. I only wi**** were so with others. They LOVE to be outside with me and we are definitely nature/water babies for sure. Both are very active like me and we rather enjoy all those activities. YES! You've got it right there for sure! A TOOL! The changes and "wow" moments you're seeing will only happen more often and you'll be so happy and excited/thrilled with them.

Thank you SO MUCH for sharing this with me/us. BIG hugs to you .....

I love that you love YOU !!
OMG this is the greatest acomplishment of it all if you ask me . Yes we experience the weightloss , but gaining love for ourselves and appreciation for all we have done .. is simply the best .
Congratulations sweety on all you have done so far. Your journey will get even sweeter as time goes on . So many other changes coming your way .

Take care and again .. Congratulations ,

Natalie

What an awesome post from equally AWESOME lady!
I had to read it twice. I cannot tell you how proud I am of you and what you have accomplished thus far on the journey.
My  husband and daughter (18) call me the Weight Nazi...and they don't mean it in a good way.
I am so desperately trying to teach them better eating habits. Hubs is better than my girl though. She is 5'6" and 185 lbs. Much too much. She eats junk food, soda and late at night. (she buys her own junk)


Thanks for being an actve part of our family here on OH.

Melissa,

After reading this post three times and seeing so much of myself and then reading Kat's post and again seeing so much of myself I am at a loss for words!  Kat said it wonderfully.  I am so glad to have met you and consider you part of my family now.  I thank you for all you have brought me.  I, too, am trying hard to get the rest of my family to eat better.  Kara, my 13 year old, has lost about 15 pounds (even though I didn't think she NEEDED to) and is really watching EVERYTHING that she eats.  The only thing I have not been able to get her to "kick" is the Monster Energy Drinks, but we are limited to one a day!  Steve has changed his eating habits but he won't eat sugar free very much.  He hates any kind of artificial sweetner because it leaves an after taste and gives him a headache.  My dad eats better when I am around (since I make his plates) but I am still working on what he eats during the day!  We are getting there, slowly but surley.  I am very proud of the progress you have made.

Tammy

Bravo Melissa!!!!  You have sucha  bright & beautiful personality & attitude.  It will take you far.  Your story is uplifting & wonderful.  Congrats on your success so far!

Your post brought tears to my eyes.....

thanks for the uplift.....

Melissa - thanks for posting this.  I think i am still working on loving myself more, but i sure like myself better!  ((((hugs to you)))), lys

what a wonderful post this is!  Thanks for being you and thanks for letting us be a part of your journey so far.  Isn't it empowering to look within and embrace yourself and say *I* did this for MYSELF!  And helping the hubbykins and children along the way is a great way for the whole family to get involved and healthier together.  I'm so happy for you!