Am I overreating?

Yesterday was my daughters dance recitals.  My oldest was in the 2pm show and they both were in the 7pm show.  For whatever reason, it is not important, I did not get the help I was suppose to get from my mom to get my girls ready for the show.  That is hair and makeup.  I am not upset over that, things happened and I did what I had to do.  And i went to both shows.  So by the second show I was spent.  Exhausted and overstimulated.  During intermission I cam out to sit in a diffrent chair and put my feet up.  When I came out my mom had the girls out from backstage and getting them a snack.  They are suppose to remain back stage.  I got livid.  They just had a big meal before the second performance anyways.  She came over to the table and I told her they need to be back stage.  She gets them cheese curls!!!!  I am like no AJ still has a performance, she will get it all over her costume.  She gets prepared to take them backstage and one of the moms comes up to me and ask me a question and then my mom asks if JR can stay out there and finish since she was done with her performance.  I just flipped out and yelled they BOTH need to be back stage.  and I just started crying and crying.  She come back out and says I am leaving.  Fine leave.  I go back in to watch the performance and she texts me, I am leavng see-ya.  Oh how mature for a 49 year old woman.  I wrote fine and basically why she can not have empathy and understand for being 4 days out of surgery getting the girls ready pratically myself.  Basically she calls me back and say she can't have empathy for me because she told me not to go and I want to do it all and get them ready.  i wont bore you with the details, but she was not there in morning to get Justice ready.  Who was suppose to?  Inbetween shows, my husband was going to make the kids something to eat, she chose to leave and get McDs and take her sweet old time and get the boys ice cream.  We only had an hour to get the girls back to the school.  So I HAD to do it myself.  She text me where was the fing farther?  Fing helping me out.  He was the one washing off JR's makeup so I can reapply it in a diffrent color.  He was the one getting things I needed to get the girls ready.   My GOD!  I told her I did not want to talk to her for a few days. I am so mad at her.  She wants us to be understanding of her because she is going through the changes of life, which I have been very understanding through her nastiness.  That I have been through a major suregery and my body is out of wacked and so are my hormones, regardless what I have done, I may overreact.  She can not be understanding of what I am going through.  Then what really ****** me off, she left the recital and missed AJ last performance for her selfish reasons.  They are the ones who suffered.  Asking me where grandma is.  Am I overreacting and did I overreact?

Based on your post, I cannot tell if you are overeating....did you eat the cheese curls???

I am not even going to touch this.  Thanks for your help.

Ok...I see now...you meant to say "OVERREACTING"....not "OVEREATING"....... No opinion.

When  I first read  your topic line I thought  you were asking if you were over-eating! I read through your post and found that no you weren't over eating! Over reacting? A little. Stressed, have hormones starting to go nutso, and still getting anethesia out of your body??? YOU BETCHA! Take a deep breath and continue to focus on you. !  Glad you vented to us. feel better

I see two hormone charged women.  One who is exhausted from surgery.  I think you both acted pretty typical.  Let is simmer for as long as you need too.  Give each other a hug.  And don't discuss. it anymore.  It's just one of those things.  Hugs, Loris

Hey, Melissa:  Stress makes all of us go a little off the deep end -- couple that with your surgery (and as you said, major surgery) and with your Mom's time in life (which is another thing altogether -- UGH!) -- and you have emotions going all over the place. Hang in there -- things will calm down, I am sure, for both of you.  BUT know, this is a great forum to vent...we all deal with all sorts of things, and there is a great group of people provide all sorts of support.   :)

PHEW!  That was scarey! I wondered how you could over-eat at this stage!! As for over-reacting, your nerves are frayed, you are tired and she was not very considerate....... but you will feel better later - and she missed a performance and that is her loss.... SO just relax and try not to let her get to you.... you could have done with more help but she obviously thinks you don't need it - and your nerves are on edge anyway so you are probably more sensitive than you would usually be... Tomorrow is another day - put this one behind you and focus on getting stronger....... {{{Hugs}}} Jackie

Good pm Melissa, Emotions run high so soon after surgery. In addition, its stress having not had surgery with all you've mentioned. Sometimes we have to take a step back and reassess the situation. For me, I have to pick my battles anymore as life is too short and being angry just doesn't work for me. Sometimes distance is a great thing because it gives parties the chance to think through the issues and come back to the table clear headed. I know you are frustrated but you are dealing with a lot right now and your health is paramount. Remember you are recovering from a major surgery. Some folks (like me) try to do and be everything and it just doesn't work. If you don't take care of you, you cannot take care of others. Folks tend to do things and say things during stressful periods and later realize it wasn't the best thing. Just keep in mind you need to rest, recoup and focus on the positives. You don't stop being all the roles you assume and others tend to think that you are still able to do all those things forgetting you are really in need of assistance right now. Keep leaning on us and leaning on those who can/will help. Chin up. Things will get better. All best!

I have a wife ans an ex-wife, neither of who seem to like me...so I ain't touching this with a 10-foot pole. :)