36C from 40DD! Thanks, et alia...
Yes, yes, yes! And, last evening I ran an errand in a strappy sundress from Abercrombie (courtesy of Goodwill) out in public! 
On the other side--I didn't realize that even thoug Ii was doing so much less crying while working for Eddie, that it would start up again with a vengeance when I got around PEOPLE (women) again! Thursday, at work with the dept. heads just slayed me. Friday, I groomed and cried at the SPCA (old friends). Yesterday I returned to finish the dog I groomed and then came home, planning to go to the festival in Lexington. I got thinking about Co on the way home, and then ended up talking about her with the mailwoman, in tears yet again. I opted OUT of the festival, knowing I would run into 20 people I know, ALL of whom would want to talk about Co and my loss. Frau (students call me this) just canNOT do this. I know in my heart that folks mean well, but I can't keep repeating my story over and over. It is too much right now.
I truly DREAD next week with the entire staff reporting back. Monday is supposed to be a combined gala event of the entire system and I have figured out a way to get out of this. I am just going to tell the principal that I can't handle it and will work quietly in my room, ordering ESL materials, OR I can take 1/2 day's sick leave, whichever he prefers. I know he will opt for quiet work alone, which is what I need.
Re: my lumps--I am noticing that when I cry they hurt. Hmmm, my body is releasing a chemical that inflames them. I teach about this in psychology, but experiencing it makes it real. Now I have a physical reason to stop crying, altho I feel like I NEED to cry to heal, and WANT to cry to remember my sweetheart. What a paradox!
Thanks to all of you. You can't imagine how much the support of my OH friends helps. Part of it is due to the fact that I can read and write posts and email when I feel up to it. Another thing that touches me is that almost ALL of us here were total strangers before we were bound together by one thing--WLS. Through our journeys we learn to know each other and realize how very many things we all have in common! Friends are not far away.
Love you all,
Lois
On the other side--I didn't realize that even thoug Ii was doing so much less crying while working for Eddie, that it would start up again with a vengeance when I got around PEOPLE (women) again! Thursday, at work with the dept. heads just slayed me. Friday, I groomed and cried at the SPCA (old friends). Yesterday I returned to finish the dog I groomed and then came home, planning to go to the festival in Lexington. I got thinking about Co on the way home, and then ended up talking about her with the mailwoman, in tears yet again. I opted OUT of the festival, knowing I would run into 20 people I know, ALL of whom would want to talk about Co and my loss. Frau (students call me this) just canNOT do this. I know in my heart that folks mean well, but I can't keep repeating my story over and over. It is too much right now.
I truly DREAD next week with the entire staff reporting back. Monday is supposed to be a combined gala event of the entire system and I have figured out a way to get out of this. I am just going to tell the principal that I can't handle it and will work quietly in my room, ordering ESL materials, OR I can take 1/2 day's sick leave, whichever he prefers. I know he will opt for quiet work alone, which is what I need.
Re: my lumps--I am noticing that when I cry they hurt. Hmmm, my body is releasing a chemical that inflames them. I teach about this in psychology, but experiencing it makes it real. Now I have a physical reason to stop crying, altho I feel like I NEED to cry to heal, and WANT to cry to remember my sweetheart. What a paradox!
Thanks to all of you. You can't imagine how much the support of my OH friends helps. Part of it is due to the fact that I can read and write posts and email when I feel up to it. Another thing that touches me is that almost ALL of us here were total strangers before we were bound together by one thing--WLS. Through our journeys we learn to know each other and realize how very many things we all have in common! Friends are not far away.
Love you all,
Lois Special Note to Donna--Hope you read this (
)
My shrinking tube socks will be knee-hi trouser socks before long! I have some 34Ds that were Cody's, don't know if I will ever be 34. BUT, when I get to the trouser sock stage there is only knee-hi hose left. When I get there I will be doing like Ron White demonstrated on the Blue Collar Comedy Tour--the skit about seeing old biker chicks' boobs--they have to roll them up and down!! 
Seriously, I mentioned your remark about tube sock boobs to the GYN's NP and nurse and they got a big laugh out of it.
Thanks, I need all the laughs I can get.
Lois
)
My shrinking tube socks will be knee-hi trouser socks before long! I have some 34Ds that were Cody's, don't know if I will ever be 34. BUT, when I get to the trouser sock stage there is only knee-hi hose left. When I get there I will be doing like Ron White demonstrated on the Blue Collar Comedy Tour--the skit about seeing old biker chicks' boobs--they have to roll them up and down!!
Seriously, I mentioned your remark about tube sock boobs to the GYN's NP and nurse and they got a big laugh out of it.
Thanks, I need all the laughs I can get.
Lois 
Hi Lowee!! That is funny about the knee hi!! Oh, and thankfully there would not be channce that my daughter would see this or she would totally stop talking to me!! But when we went shopping she saw my 'tubes' and she said 'mom, that's not bad at all, I look the same.' Now bear in mind she has had six kids, so it's quite possibly she looks similar - but the same!! No way!!
But I did get a really cool 'wonder' type bra. It stands up without anything in it. Pretty weird. But I just put those girls in that magic bra and tuck them in to go to sleep, and let the bra do it's magic!! It works!!
love
perky donna
Oh Lois, I feel so bad for you and having to relive your loss of your daughter each time you see someone new. I know it is a comfort to know that so many people care, but at the same time it can be so taxing to keep going over and over it. You are in my thought daily. My best friend lost her son on May 1st of this year. He was 33 years old with two small children. Very tragic thing.
On the other hand, congrats to all of your weight loss, you are looking fab.
Susan
PS Donna you are so funny, I just love ya.
Hi Sweetie...I know it must be hard reliving this over and over again but just put on that beautiful smile and enjoy life. I am sure that is what Cody would want you to do. I know it helps to cry and get it out and my thoughts and prayers are still with you.
Isn't the Goodwill wonderful? I love going in there and spending hours looking! I feel like I have found a treasure chest everytime I go in. I never know from one day to the next what size I am in but it is fun to try on. And I never know what wonderful dress or shirt I am gonna find..
Take care and we love you...be good to yourself...hope to see you in Charlottesville.
Hugs,
Betsy
Lois , I want you to know something . I think of you often .. especially when I am with my Amy .. I see your the strenght you have .. and the courage .. whether you feel it or not , you have shown me so much over the last couple of months . You have shown me that life is sweet and that I am to honor and always tell my children I love them .. you have shown me courage of a woman that has overcome not only her loss but her own re-birth of sorts through your weight loss ..
While I know the pain of mourning .. and letting go .. it hurts worse than any pain imanginable .. atleast for me that is how it felt .. and still does from time to time .. but one thing I know we both now have on our sides is more time .. and thank God for the surgery and that it has given us this ... time to enjoy our lives until we do go to be with our loved ones ..
You take what time you need .. and you do what your heart feels it needs to . I am sure your co-workers will understand .. and support you ..
Thank you for being so open with your story ... and having the ability to share it in a way that has touched me and has inspired me .
Love you ..
Natalie
PS.. We will Hike that Mountain ... !!!!
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