Telling People about Surgery

One little kinda of funny note to add to this subject of to tell or not to tell. I work in retail and have customers I see once a year. There was one I had missed by not being ther on her aannual pilgrimage for a couple of years so she had not seen me since I had lost all my weight. She asked me what had happend to the "cute little chubby girl" and I told her that was me and she didn't believe it till I showed her pictures. Well she was thrilled for me and told me I was always so cute and now I was gorgeous and healthy and stopped cold in her tracks.

She looked all serious and said ' you did mean to do this , I mean you haven't been like serious ill or any thing". She was so cute, she was all worried I had been in treatment for severe cancer or something!!and was very relieved when Itold her about my RNY and sent her neice up tio met me because she was thinking about it and has since had lap band and is doing well with it.

meggie!

I was terrified to tell my parents, but when I did, they were totally supportive! I was shocked because they usually are not supportive of anything I do. My daughters had helped me research weight loss surgery and were with me every step of the way.

What do you tell people? You tell them about the wonderful tool you have found to help make you healthy and happy! When they want to know why you can't have (alcohol, soda, cake, fudge, huge helpings) you just say, sorry I had weight loss surgery and I can't eat those things.

If they show real interest, you whip out your before and after pictures.

Don't be ashamed of taking this step for your health and happiness!

Good luck!

First of all - you don't owe anybody an explanation.  Period.  It is up to you to share and there are various ways to handle nosey people - just find whatever is comfortable to you - deflect, ignore, make a joke, etc.  I like to deflect - people asked me how much weight I lost...... "Oh, a LOT" and smiled. 

As for recovery - it is no different than recovering from any other surgery other than the eating and you don't have to explain that, either.  I went out with a vendor when I was early out and did the "push the food around on my plate" trick and it worked.  They were too self-absorbed to notice how much I ate and they expect women to eat like birds anyway.  Now I can eat more it isn't so noticeable as long as I order a small portion.

For me personally - I told all my friends, family and co-workers.  I have worked at the same plant for 20 years so it is like family here and I had just gone through breast cancer treatment so if I suddenly started dropping weight they would have been worried about me.  I got the whole gamut of reactions, but you have to realize it is about THEM not you.  I don't usually tell new people and co-workers because I enjoy not being perceived as a "former fat person".

Good luck with your journey - it is a TRIP !!! 

In my opinion, it's all in your attitude.

As a lesbian, I have never hidden who I am, even in my conservative profession (I'm an attorney).  My appearance doesn't give me away, so I could hide if I wanted to, but who wants to live like that?  I am honest about my life and make no apologies, because I have nothing to apologize for.  If anyone asks, I tell them the truth.

Same principle with WLS.  I told everyone who "needed" to know because they'd be watching me drop pounds so quickly -- e.g., my immediate family and my co-workers in my very small office.  I told them with the pride and happiness I felt about my decision to pull myself out of the downward spiral that my health and outlook had become.

After I'd lost the weight and people asked me how I did it -- people who are not close to me and I would not normally share my medical info with, such as clients -- I'd say, "I eat a whole lot less than I used to, and I exercise."  Even then, some people ask me point blank whether I had surgery.  I've always told the truth and done some "singing from the rooftops," like Vivian, about how it was the greatest decision I ever made.

I own my decision and am proud of it.  I let people know in subtle ways that I'm not going to let them lay their negativity on me.  The way I look now is truly something they can't argue with.

I told my parents, bros, coworkers and mom's side of the family.  My dad's side doesn't know about it... I didn't feel like telling them because they are always all up in everyone's business and also that they always criticize you instead of being happy for taking steps in becoming a healthier person.  So screw 'em...!

I just tell everyone that since I've gone thru my divorce, I've gotten on a diet and am being more careful on what/how much I consume.