I felt like I wanted to share this
I have attempted to try to put my profile together and came across this. I felt like I wanted to share. You never never never know who you are affecting and when. This is my first post here...
11-13-2007
I was a lurker on this site for over a year and a half. I decided to become a member on October 21st, 2006 which was 3 days before my WLS. I was scared to death and thought maybe somehow setting up a user account and posting how scared I was to go to the hospital the night before might somehow comfort me.
Well it really didn't "comfort" me but in someway made a difference to me on the inside that I had broadcasted to the world that I was getting ready to go get some medical assistance to help save my life and I was scared to death.
It has been over a year since that fearful post and you could not possibly understand the changes in my life over the past year. The reason you could not understand is because there are no words that I can find to describe my new life to you. I can try and try but I just can't find them in the English language.
I started my weight loss journey weighing 277 lbs. I am 5" 3". At my one year Surgeon follow-up appointment I weighed 127 lbs. You see I have lost 150lbs and even typing those numbers are incomprehensible to me. I find myself crying often when I think about it, it overwhelms me and I have this overwhelming feeling come over me and I just begin to weep.
My journey started around the same time that Melinda's started. I read her posts daily and was experiencing the same exact struggles as she was. We have the same Insurance Company, had to do weight reductions to lose a certain percent of body weight before surgery could be approved, got denial letters due to incompetent office staff that left pieces of faxed papers laying on the floor etc. etc.. It was encouraging for me to read Melinda's post. We were going through the same thing. The one difference between her and I was that she was so bold and so confident in herself that she posted her daily struggles. Me on the other hand was not bold, had no confidence and could just wish I could post my thoughts and experiences. I was just too afraid. I plan to tell her to her face one day how much I admire her. She was my Rock and didn't even know it. We ended up getting our approvals for surgery around the same time and she had her surgery a week or two before I did. So you see, Melinda kept me going. She does not even know.
In this year of healing I have purposed in my heart that I am going to change my social interactive behavior that morbid obesity handicapped me with for so long. I no longer just want to lurk and read about other peoples ups and downs. I want to be a participant. I want to be the one that is encouraging someone else that is so down trodden with physical humiliation that it affects every part of their social being.
You know a prime example of still wanting to hide behind a veil when I set this account up over a year ago is the username I chose. I chose the name Julie because I have always loved that name. I thought it was so pretty. My name is not Julie. You know as kids when a group of us would play a game and everyone picked a pretend name for themselves mine was always Julie. Isn't that funny. And then I chose the word Jaded to go along with Julie because that is exactly how I felt. So for now I will leave it jaded julie but I no longer need her to hide behind. I will become involved, post my before and after pictures and can't wait to be part of the Lunch Bunch. But most important of all I want to be an encourager. I know what you feel, I lived on that street and I am getting better and better everyday both physically and mentally. Thanks for staying with this post for so long. I just felt it was my time to share. Goodnight from jaded_julie to all the other jaded_julies out there.
11-13-2007
I was a lurker on this site for over a year and a half. I decided to become a member on October 21st, 2006 which was 3 days before my WLS. I was scared to death and thought maybe somehow setting up a user account and posting how scared I was to go to the hospital the night before might somehow comfort me.
Well it really didn't "comfort" me but in someway made a difference to me on the inside that I had broadcasted to the world that I was getting ready to go get some medical assistance to help save my life and I was scared to death.
It has been over a year since that fearful post and you could not possibly understand the changes in my life over the past year. The reason you could not understand is because there are no words that I can find to describe my new life to you. I can try and try but I just can't find them in the English language.
I started my weight loss journey weighing 277 lbs. I am 5" 3". At my one year Surgeon follow-up appointment I weighed 127 lbs. You see I have lost 150lbs and even typing those numbers are incomprehensible to me. I find myself crying often when I think about it, it overwhelms me and I have this overwhelming feeling come over me and I just begin to weep.
My journey started around the same time that Melinda's started. I read her posts daily and was experiencing the same exact struggles as she was. We have the same Insurance Company, had to do weight reductions to lose a certain percent of body weight before surgery could be approved, got denial letters due to incompetent office staff that left pieces of faxed papers laying on the floor etc. etc.. It was encouraging for me to read Melinda's post. We were going through the same thing. The one difference between her and I was that she was so bold and so confident in herself that she posted her daily struggles. Me on the other hand was not bold, had no confidence and could just wish I could post my thoughts and experiences. I was just too afraid. I plan to tell her to her face one day how much I admire her. She was my Rock and didn't even know it. We ended up getting our approvals for surgery around the same time and she had her surgery a week or two before I did. So you see, Melinda kept me going. She does not even know.
In this year of healing I have purposed in my heart that I am going to change my social interactive behavior that morbid obesity handicapped me with for so long. I no longer just want to lurk and read about other peoples ups and downs. I want to be a participant. I want to be the one that is encouraging someone else that is so down trodden with physical humiliation that it affects every part of their social being.
You know a prime example of still wanting to hide behind a veil when I set this account up over a year ago is the username I chose. I chose the name Julie because I have always loved that name. I thought it was so pretty. My name is not Julie. You know as kids when a group of us would play a game and everyone picked a pretend name for themselves mine was always Julie. Isn't that funny. And then I chose the word Jaded to go along with Julie because that is exactly how I felt. So for now I will leave it jaded julie but I no longer need her to hide behind. I will become involved, post my before and after pictures and can't wait to be part of the Lunch Bunch. But most important of all I want to be an encourager. I know what you feel, I lived on that street and I am getting better and better everyday both physically and mentally. Thanks for staying with this post for so long. I just felt it was my time to share. Goodnight from jaded_julie to all the other jaded_julies out there.
Boy you've come a long way!
You are a inspiration!
But your right you never ever know all those who you've touched and how.
My daughter and I talk about this from time to time, you know growing up what were your fondness memories.
As a parent you think its the big Christmas presents or their first car you bought them, but in reality its usually more simple.
Like Dad you remember the time just you and I went to the movies and stop for breakfast at that little dinner afterwords.
Its like buying that big present only to watch them play for hours with the empty box!
I know it seems a little of track but thats why I try to encourage people who lurk to contribute, your cheating us out of knowing you. Gaining your insight (no matter how little you think it might be) lets face it you just might be the box! The one who feels the can't express themselves, might be the very one who enlightens and allows are imagination to take over, you never know until you get out of your safety zone and contribute.
And Trina I'm glad I met the finished product the confident, spirited, go getter thats helped me out so much! I'll always be grateful Bob
"In this year of healing I have purposed in my heart that I am going to change my social interactive behavior that morbid obesity handicapped me with for so long."
Trina, I could not help but smile when I read this. To watch you in a crowded room of people... you flight like a butterfly from person to person... did you know a butterfly pollinates flowers, giving life, wherever it goes... it just reminds me of the life giving power that you share when you visit with others. Surely you have purposed in your heart to overcome that handicap, and are DOING it. Congratulations! Thank you for sharing with us today, and being a reminder that we can do anything our hearts purpose to do.
This brought tears to my eyes! If you and Melinda and Susan and Sheila and Paula....and all the rest of the great success stories I read about and meet with are just a small indication of what might be in store for ME, I just don't know how I can wait for April 14, 2008!
Keep encouraging us and keep your Light shining brightly!!
Trina, thank you so much for posting this. You have been blessed by God with a wonderful gift and I am blessed to know you and be a receiver of that gift. Your post brought tears to my eyes, because I truly understand where you are coming from. You have so much to offer and contribute that each person that reads your posts or just your reponses to others will be touched in a way that will be with them forever. Someday, the healing will be all done and the hole that as created by the pain we have suffered through the years will be closed up and how wonderful that will feel. After WLS, it is almost as if you go through a "resurrection" process and that is a wonderful experience.
Thank you my wonderful new friend for being who you are and for allowing me to be a part of your life.
lghthsewtchr AKA Wendy Siebert
Oh my dear, where do I start? You are my sunshine, one of the rays of hope that keeps me go'n. You know that you have made my results come so easy and I know that god sent you and the rest to me, to be there as friends, sisters and brothers in sharing this journey, of a lifetime. He knows what he is do'n , and he does them for a reason. That is why he brought you to me, and me to you...... And I THANK GOD everyday for that.... ......Thank you all, my gods gifts......Hugs and love Barb
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