OT: Baby birds flew out of the nest

Well I think Ive cried all night long, after a short sleep I woke up to swollen eyes, headache and a broken heart. My two boys both 19yrs old, not twins one is my son and the other is my brother I raised since he was 1yr old, they left me yesterday to go live in NC, even though their dads live there and they will be living in mine and my exhusbands home I still worry. I know some of you out there can relate to what Im saying. I know they are old enough to be on their own but OMG it hurts so bad. Now we will be moving 7 hrs away from them. The house seems so quiet now and each time I walk by their rooms I cry. My 14yr old son is a wonder child he has been so loving and has been trying to comfort me. My mom lives with me, she is disabled and she to has cried all night long.  Does anybody have any suggestions on how to handle this? Does it get better? I can't believe I am actually moving without them. Please say a prayer for me and for my kids. I worry about them so much. Hugs to all and thanks for letting me use all the shoulders on this board.

Donna, 10 years ago, I moved from west Tennessee to Sevierville.  I left both of my kids there, 7 hours away.  Both were in college, 18 and 19.  Within 2 months, my son transferred to UT Knoxville, and moved in with me.  Within 8 months, my daughter had done the same.  Thank goodness, by then, Matt had moved in to the dorm!  Your boys may stay in NC, or they may not.  Just keep loving them, and let them spread their wings! Marilyn

Thank you for such encouraging words. Im hoping and praying every day that they will decide to come home with me and go to college. You're right I do need to let them spread their wings and fly but it is soooo hard. Ive never felt such a broken heart before.

Donna, my son is only 9 1/2, but I don't think I could handle it if he left.  Hopefully I've got a few years to prepare.  Will I ever be ready?  Probably not!  Prayers being lifted for you today!

I don't think any parent is ever truely prepared for their child to grow up. Thank you so much for the prayers I need them. I think God heard all of you because he has kept me busy cleaning house. Thank you so much! Hugs

When my daughter left for college in 2005, she only went across town but she decided to live on campus.  I thought I was truly prepared and would be just fine.  When the moment came for me to say good bye, I fell to pieces.  My husband ran interference for me that Sunday at church.  I could not talk about it for 2 weeks because everytime I did, I fell apart.  With time, I began to accept the fact that, although she is my only child, she was an "adult" and was ready to grow-up and move forward.  Today, she is almost 21 and although I don't see her everyday, I do talk to her almost everyday and if we don't talk, then we send text messages.  Best advice I can give, allow them to spread their wings, be there for them when they fail (and they almost always do), don't rub their noses in it when they do fail, and always have an ear available to listen if they need to talk, but don't enable them.  Let them make their own decisions - even when you know it is going to turn out badly.  That is how we all learned and look where we are.  Oh, and the most important piece of advice of all, continue to bathe them in prayer daily.  Hang in there, we all have to go through this as difficult as it is, but we survive and so do they.

Thank you so much for posting, it really made me realize Im not alone in feeling the way I feel. It has put me at ease a little, and you're right they need to be on their own to experience life without mom on their heels. I have talked to them twice today and let them know how much I love them and that at any time that they want to return home they can, and if they need anything Im here for them. Thanks for everything it really means a lot to me. Hugs

Just thought I'd drop in and see how you are doing?  Hope you are feeling better about the boys moving out.  Hang in there, I promise, it will get better.  Hope you have a great weekend.