Separation/Divorce after WLS?

It just hit me that I seem to see a lot of posts on this board and others where there is a separation and/or divorce after WLS. It also seems to happen more often when a husband has WLS surgery as opposed to when the wife has the surgery.  My wife and I have been married 36+ years and she is fully supportive of me. However,she is somewhat scared due to my heart problems (pacemaker, stent, CHF). We talk about how much more enjoyable life will be after I lose this excess weight - more motorcycle trips, going to the gym together again, etc. 

Just wondering if the results after WLS surgery is the main issue or something else is the cause. 

Brian and I discussed this too, but we've been married 26 maybe not as long but together longer. Anywho, still I look at him as my soulmate and he was there for me through all kinds of illnesses and bad times.  I think if you love is sincere and pure then no harm should ever be. I have gone it will be like we are young again. And we will be able to go and do at least somethings. Live again.  MyHotComments
Barb

Hey Bob, Actually The psychiatrist I went to for insurance approval maybe same as you Dr.O' Bryan.. Said usually if you have problems in the marriage especially trust issues or the partner not having WLS is overweight and has poor self esteem then WLS can add additional strain on the marriage. Been married 29 years myself Deb has been totally behind this shes made which really helps. C' Ya Bob

Ditto Bob!  Like I said, my wife is fully supportive although a little scared for me due to my heart problems. But I really feel for the folks who are about to go through this or have gone through this and then get hit with separation/ divorce. Seems like it should enhance a relationship rather than hurt it.

My husband is my best friend and strongest supporter!  He has been with me every step of the way !  He slept in a chair beside my bedside when I had my surgery and checks to make sure that I get my vitamins every day. He also keeps tabs on my protein and fluid intake.  If anything, our relationship has gotten stronger!

And that's how it should be IMO.

Hubby and I discussed this in depth before my surgery. I let him know that people will make comments about me looking good and leaving him. I also let him know that I'm not going anywhere! We will celebrate 35 years in September and our marriage is stronger than ever.  He hates hospitals but he stayed with me not only through the 2 nights following my RNY, but also the 2 nights recently after my plastics. He has emptied my drains, washed my hair and body, dressed me and fixed my protein cappuccino. He also washed my face with a cold cloth to help stop the nausea and dry heaves. I've known since our first date that he was the man I would spend the rest of my life with. He holds my hand when we go anywhere and also when we are just sitting on the couch watching TV. He tells me it's because he wants to make sure all the other guys know I'm with him. LOL He was very nervous too about both surgeries but he understood how important each one was to me and he has been my biggest support. Am I spoiled? No, I'm just well taken care of!!  Actually, I know that I am very spoiled...and very lucky. I do spoil him in return. He deserves it!

SusieQ I think Bill likes the fact that your church folks think he has remarried! woohoo! Remember those ladies that asked who Bill had brought to church!?  that is hilarious!

Oh, yeah, I forgot. I am my husband's "other woman"! Bwahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!

Well, apparently John and I are newlyweds ... we just celebrated 13 years in December (together 14 1/2). We have always had a very strong relationship and my WLS surgery has actually been a fun part of our journey together. He has taken such good care of me, but also sees me as being so much stronger than he'd ever imagined. He also has enjoyed watching all the changes (physically) that have taken place over the past 5 1/2 months.   Having my health back has benefitted our whole family - and my marriage, in particular. Dr. O'Bryan told me the same thing - that those w/ a strong marriage usually come out stronger, those with underlying - or not so underlying - issues, tend to have a harder go of it than before surgery.  I thank God every day for my husband and our marriage. And every day I thank my husband for who he is!  One lucky girl, ~ Tara