Unable to handle stress after wls?

I was just wondering if this is normal... I can't handle as much stress as I used to. It upsets me so much and I get this ball of frustration in my stomach along with not being able to eat and wanting to cry. Its not all the time, but only when in stressful situations. My employer wants me to do two positions now, forcing me, with no monetary increase or choice in the matter... I told them that its not possible but it did no good. I am just so upset over it... I cannot handle the stress of both jobs.

Wow...I think anyone would be stressed out under those cir****tances! You know, Melinda, if you are that good at work so that they trust you with two positions, sounds like you could find another job in a heartbeat. Maybe that's what your boss needs to hear! I just don't see how they can expect that of you without a substantial raise...let them think about the expense of hiring two new people to fill your shoes and see what they say then!

Melinda, I believe that these feelings would be normal for anyone in this situation and if you were a stress eater before surgery, like I was, it does not go away very easily and will be challenging at times, this sounds like one of these times. However, this sounds like it would be stressful for anyone regardless as to if they have had WLS or not. I would consider going up the chain of command to someone higher and inquire as to if what your boss is requiring of you cannot be altered or if a monetary increase can be offered. Sometimes, your immediate supervisor will try not to offer you help or an increase because they know you will do the job for less and if it will keep their bottom line down, it makes them look better to the ones above. I learned this a long time ago, when I was told that they were not allowed to do something very similar, but when I inquired, my supervisor received quarterly bonuses based on the bottom lined and I was doing the job of two. However, when the boss above found out, they were fired and I was offered their position. Wish you luck and I will keep you in my prayers, By the way have one of those wonderful hot cocoa protein drinks tonight and relax Shelia

I went to HR several months ago when they forced me into this new job duty situation... back in late Jan/early February. I had several choices: apply for my old job and if hired, take a paycut; do this job with no payrise; find another job inside the hospital; or find another job outside the hospital. Those were my choices... I asked HR about the raise. She said because it was a consolidation thing, my spvsr was right... and that everyone seems to be going through it. I had the feeling since they forced me into the new duties that eventually they would have me doing ALL of it... I was right. I told them how I felt about it... and said it was too stressful and couldn't be done. I finally put it back off to them by saying, "Ok you tell me what to do in 8 hours, and if work does not get done, I will not be the one to be responsible. I cannot do it all." And they admitted that they didn't know what I did in 8 hours and couldn't help me prioritize! I am not going to work overtime or at home like I did last year when my duties became too much during a special project. I'm salary... so I dont get paid more when working over. Basically I am stuck. My mom asked me last night, "Are they trying to get you to quit?" And I truly believe that they do trust my work ethic, knowing that the "good ole fat Melinda" would bend over backwards to get it done... but I am not that good ole girl anymore. I have my limits and I know how much I can and cannot do. Does anyone know of a good job opening?

Melinda, I know EXACTLY what you are talking about! That is what they did to me before I quit. I let them know that I couldnn't do the job I was doing 100% because it had gotten to be too big. I begged for them to hire someone else to do part of the job. It never happened. I quit. They seperated the job into an FTE and a 0.5 FTE. I was so hurt. But in all honestly it was the best thing they ever did for me. I still miss everyone but professionnally and personnally I'm in a better spot right now with much less stress! Have they suggested a time log? I kept a time log for a while (which by the way is a pain but worth it). It showed how much time I spent on each task. They agreed the job had gotten too big but didn't do anythinng about it. Melinda, I'm sorry to get off on me but hon, you have to do what's best for you. Don't let them make you sick. What you're feeling is so normal. It hasn't got anythinng to do with the surgery. It's your own instincts and it is too much! It took me just getting FED UP to say enough is enough! You'll either settle into the job and adjust or you'll get so tired of it that you'll find another job. Try to take some time to do something for yourself away from THERE! Hang in there! Call me if you need to! (((HUGS)))) Janie

Melinda, We will have to get together and talk about this some more, because it sounds like we are both facing similar situations. I go back to work Monday for the first time since surgery and something has already occurred that makes me reluctant to return. Shelia

I hate to hear that Melinda.... sounds like they're getting the better end of the bargain and a deal out of you! What a crock. I don't know exactly what you do, but it might be good for you to just get out...give you peace of mind and less stress. I got a new job myself... I just got tired of working where I'm working now. I was too self-conscious to look for a new job before... I mean, who will honestly hire a 366lb blob?? Now, I've been on 3 interviews, and landed a job 3 minutes from my house.. no more commute to nashville, no more $40/week in gas and that is just going back and forth to work - not including any running around, guaranteed holidays off and weekends. Anyways..... I hope everything works out the way you want.

I agree that this kind of stress would be hard for anyone to handle. It may be that, with your new found confidence, you are no longer willing to put up with the same treatment that would have had you working overtime to please everyone in the past. You realize now that you deserve better than what is being expected of you. It may be time to dust off that old resume. If you really like your job except for what is going on now, you can always approach them once you get another job offer and tell them you have this other offer and will take it unless they are willing to work with you to resolve these current issues. If they are smart, they will realize that they would be better off hiring someone to take part of your duties rather than lose you. If they don't realize that, then you take the other position and move on. You deserve better than what you have put up with in the past. We all do!

Right on Susan! I have to totally agree. I have fopund with my new confidence growing it is harder to tolerate behavior from people that I used to just think was acceptable. I am not sure on advice I know you need the job but heck is the stress worth it???

There are two jobs at another facility that I am looking at... I hope something comes through but I am officially looking for a job. All day, I kept up with what I did, at what time, how long it took, and sent both supervisors the email at days end. I will keep them "abreast" as they call it, and on the email, at the end, I tell them what concerns I have that particular day, projects that are behind (no fault of mine as it was not "my" job for the past 5-6 weeks)... I am keeping copies of these emails so that if/when I am brought in to ask why deadlines have fallen behind, I can show them what I have been doing. You see, I think I said this before, but good ole' fat Melinda might have done this stuff... and worked my fingers to the bone to get it done, but she no longer lives here... skinny Melinda lives here now, and she can be a real basket (my non cuss word for b*t*h)