Emotional Stability after Gastric Bypass
I'm an 18-year-old female and had gastric bypass surgery on June 23rd, 2009. I started out at 275 and am now at 190 and still losing.
Despite being extremely satisfied with my weight loss, I'm not satisfied with my mood. I find myself hesitant to reach out to friends I haven't seen since surgery, and sometimes I don't want to socialize at all, which isn't like me. When I get hit with an emotional blow, it feels five times harder than it used to. Sometimes when I'm out and I get hungry I feel the sudden, overwhelming need to go home, even though I know enough now that I can eat in most restaurants without problems.
There is the occasional day where I don't do anything. I feel a huge sense of loss on these days, like I'm missing out on so much, that I'm just a baby and people shouldn't have let me do this before I got to have more life experience. (Then I get rational the next day and remember it's just food...)
I guess I'm wondering if these things are normal, or if I should seek help from a therapist.
Despite being extremely satisfied with my weight loss, I'm not satisfied with my mood. I find myself hesitant to reach out to friends I haven't seen since surgery, and sometimes I don't want to socialize at all, which isn't like me. When I get hit with an emotional blow, it feels five times harder than it used to. Sometimes when I'm out and I get hungry I feel the sudden, overwhelming need to go home, even though I know enough now that I can eat in most restaurants without problems.
There is the occasional day where I don't do anything. I feel a huge sense of loss on these days, like I'm missing out on so much, that I'm just a baby and people shouldn't have let me do this before I got to have more life experience. (Then I get rational the next day and remember it's just food...)
I guess I'm wondering if these things are normal, or if I should seek help from a therapist.
Hi there. I know it's been a while since you posted but I hope you're still around.
I think what you're going through is totally normal. Seeing a therapist would not be a bad idea but not because what you're feeling is wrong, just cause they could help you work through it.
I think that whenever we give up a coping mechanism that we've relied on it's kind of like having to take a step backwards in our emotional development and learn how to do it again from scratch without that old crutch. Perhaps food was like that for you and your brain is having to adjust to knowing you can't use it like you used to. And I don't just mean using it in a negative way either. For lots of people, when we use something to cope with hard/bad feelings we use the same thing to deal with and show happiness and excitement. I know I use food more on the positive side than I do the negative. I don't eat when I'm depressed, I eat to celebrate. Can't do either any more I guess
Anyway, I just wanted to say this and I hope you're feeling better these days but I'm starting to frequent this forum even though I'm 26 cause I had a lot of great, slightly older friends when I was a teen and I think it's important to pay it back.
I think what you're going through is totally normal. Seeing a therapist would not be a bad idea but not because what you're feeling is wrong, just cause they could help you work through it.
I think that whenever we give up a coping mechanism that we've relied on it's kind of like having to take a step backwards in our emotional development and learn how to do it again from scratch without that old crutch. Perhaps food was like that for you and your brain is having to adjust to knowing you can't use it like you used to. And I don't just mean using it in a negative way either. For lots of people, when we use something to cope with hard/bad feelings we use the same thing to deal with and show happiness and excitement. I know I use food more on the positive side than I do the negative. I don't eat when I'm depressed, I eat to celebrate. Can't do either any more I guess
Anyway, I just wanted to say this and I hope you're feeling better these days but I'm starting to frequent this forum even though I'm 26 cause I had a lot of great, slightly older friends when I was a teen and I think it's important to pay it back.
Highest Wt: 274 / LAP-Band Low: 180 / Sleeved at 233 / Goal: 160!
I just wanted to say thank you for your post. I feel like I'm reading something that is me in the future. I am going to be 18 in May, and was planning on getting gastric bypass then. I am the same exact weight you were, and in the same shoes you probably were in.
I know im not answering your question, but i have a question for you... (lets turn the tables a bit :P)
Do you regret getting your surgery? If you could go back would you reverse it? And finally, Can you just tell me a little bit about your experience/story? Im very nervous and because I seem to be embarking on your same journey you were on, can you help me.
I know im not answering your question, but i have a question for you... (lets turn the tables a bit :P)
Do you regret getting your surgery? If you could go back would you reverse it? And finally, Can you just tell me a little bit about your experience/story? Im very nervous and because I seem to be embarking on your same journey you were on, can you help me.
Hey,
I'm 19, so we're close in age. :)
i had my surgery done in January. I know i'm not the person you asked, but I can answer your questions and give you a viewpoint.
I don't regret it--it's only been 4 months, but the progress I've made is so great to me that I can't imagine going back to the way I was before. I've lost 54 pounds so far.
Yes, it's been tough, because at this age, I feel like we're still young and a lot of people usually ask "are you sure you're mature enough to make a decision of this magnitude?" I will never say it's easy, but anything worth getting in life is worth working hard for it. So i wouldn't reverse it. Yes, i get frustrated sometimes because I can't always eat like my friends. I have to plan things out and be smart about my choices. I can't just eat half a pizza, or order a crapload of food at a restaurant. I live in Canada, and I was able to drink legally at 19. I was only able to drink for a little while before the surgery, and now alcohol is can't be part of my lifestyle. You're only 18 and I know in the US most people can't drink before age 21. So ask yourself--are you going to miss that "milestone" that most young adults celebrate?
I'm a university student. My story in a nutshell--my mom had the surgery and has lost 200 pounds in a year. I was so motivated by her and so sick and tired of being the fat girl--of feeling like crap, having low self esteem, and hating the way i looked. I knew i was on the fast track to ending up how my mom did. So i chose to have the surgery done.
It's normal to be nervous. It would be weird if you weren't. Being nervous is a sign that you're taking this seriously and you're thinking logically about a huge lifestyle change. Good luck with whatever you decide to do. :)
I'm 19, so we're close in age. :)
i had my surgery done in January. I know i'm not the person you asked, but I can answer your questions and give you a viewpoint.
I don't regret it--it's only been 4 months, but the progress I've made is so great to me that I can't imagine going back to the way I was before. I've lost 54 pounds so far.
Yes, it's been tough, because at this age, I feel like we're still young and a lot of people usually ask "are you sure you're mature enough to make a decision of this magnitude?" I will never say it's easy, but anything worth getting in life is worth working hard for it. So i wouldn't reverse it. Yes, i get frustrated sometimes because I can't always eat like my friends. I have to plan things out and be smart about my choices. I can't just eat half a pizza, or order a crapload of food at a restaurant. I live in Canada, and I was able to drink legally at 19. I was only able to drink for a little while before the surgery, and now alcohol is can't be part of my lifestyle. You're only 18 and I know in the US most people can't drink before age 21. So ask yourself--are you going to miss that "milestone" that most young adults celebrate?
I'm a university student. My story in a nutshell--my mom had the surgery and has lost 200 pounds in a year. I was so motivated by her and so sick and tired of being the fat girl--of feeling like crap, having low self esteem, and hating the way i looked. I knew i was on the fast track to ending up how my mom did. So i chose to have the surgery done.
It's normal to be nervous. It would be weird if you weren't. Being nervous is a sign that you're taking this seriously and you're thinking logically about a huge lifestyle change. Good luck with whatever you decide to do. :)
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