19 and over weight

hi my name is khira and i am 19 yrs.old and i weigh 287.i never been over weight all my life,when i was a little girl i was always outside playing.then when i was 10 we moved to a different town and of course being 10yrs.old i was sad cause i didn't want to leave my friends.ever sice we moved here my life has gone completly down hill i started doing bad in school i started eating more cause i missed my old friends and i was sad.in middle school it got worse. being 12yrs.old you start to look at boys but nobody is looking at you cause your overweight.i remember being in school and likeing a certain boy and he being really grossed out that i liked him cause i was fat.i was always friends with the girl that all the boys liked,most of the girls i went to school with were blonde or brunette and thin and pretty and i wanted to be like them so bad. i always wanted to be that girl that all the boys thought was pretty.i finally have gotten to the point where i am comfortable with myself being who i am but i feel like i don't belonge in this body,like im not ment to be over weight.i always start working out but i never stick to it i always stop and then it's hard to get back on track again.sometimes i just sit in my room and cry cause i feel so alone and lost.i don't have many friends so it's hard to talk about issues like this since i graduated high school in 2007 i have been sitting in this house on the computer gaining weight every day.iv'e been looking for work but it's so hard right now i don't kno what to do im so tired of sitting in this house.i'll be turning 20 this year and i have no life.i wanna go out and have fun and enjoy being young i feel like im throwing my life away.i wanna lose weight for me and only me. i don't wanna do the surgery i wanna lose weight by exercising and eating right.i wanna get my life on track and start living.i have so many goals that i wanna acomplish and i feel like my weight is holding me back.

Hi Khira,
I really respect the fact that you realize you have a problem with your weight. You mention many of the things that other teens with a weight problem have experienced. You are not alone of course.

While there are tons of books and self help resources out there to spend money on, I do want to highlight one resource that you may not have seen.

Trim Kids is a book written by a really thoughtful person named Melinda Sothern. It is available on Amazon for 13 dollars. It is a 12 week program that anyone can do! Importantly, it is not a "diet book." It does contain some recipes that are healthy but it also puts them together with good common sense activities that get you moving.

Try it! You might like it.

Let me know, ok? If you have questions for Dr. Sothern, I can even find her for you!!

All the best,

Dr. Tom

listen girl i know EXACTLY where you're coming from it's so hard and i think it's sometimes harder for us because of the fact were young. people our age are going out, going to the beach, clubs etc and theres that body image factor and the wanting to 'belong.' if you dont want the surgery thats your own decesion but you need to become comitted and in control if you really want to do this and you CAN do this without a doubt. use all those feelings that you have right now as a motivation for you at the gym, or think about 'that' boy before you eat something you know you shouldn't. i've had the surgery and i still do these things and it doesnt necessarily get easier bc im still having a hard time with finding who i am but that comes with age and i think its something we all go through...feel free to ever email me or aim me (tandco32) if you ever need to talk <3