Looking for help

Hi Friends.

I had RNY surgery in December of 2015. I am really bummed. On Monday, I got reestablished with a bariatric office and nutritionist. When I started my weight loss journey I was 298. My lowest was 202. I've been under a lot of stress this past year and slowly gained weight. I am at 223. When I expressed my concern with the office and told them what my goal weight was and always has been. I was told that I would never be able to get to that weight. I just need the support and encouragement from someone. I would love to get to 170. I do not think 170 is unrealistic at all. Am I wrong?

any tips?

Thanks,

Ellen

There is absolutely no reason that you cannot reach your goal of 170 pounds.

It will take a lot of commitment and effort, but this is completely achievable. You will need to not only go back to basics, but address the issues of your emotional eating.

I am sorry that your bariatric center was so dismissive.

I know my weight gain came from the stress of school. This past week, I've been working on that and also making sure I get plenty of water. I think that was also part of the problem. After talking about my frustrations, I feel a little better. I am working on making small victories until I achieve my main goal. It also will not be a number on a scale per se. I want to feel healthy and look great. I have come so far, I know I can do this. Thank you for your support and advice. I already planned out my meals for next week and will go shopping tomorrow. Its a long road but it is worth it!

Hi Ellen

Congratulations on acknowledging your challenges with stress and weight gain, and taking action by going to the bariatric office. You were looking for support & encouragement with your goal and were left feeling let down. I am sorry this happened to you. I experienced a situation many years ago with a family doctor. I was very excited to report at my physical that I had lost just over 50 pounds on Weigh****chers. Instead of encouragement, or even any acknowledgement of my success he told me not to expect to keep it off, that the weight would inevitably come back [with a few friends]. If that happened today, I would change doctors. But in my naive teens, thought I was doomed to a life of obesity.

There are so many variables with determining "realistic" weight goals: gender, height, age, past weight history etc The nutritionist may have thought s/he was being helpful by offering their opinion, but what was the basis for the opinion?

You are absolutely right - you do need support and encouragement. Perhaps this nutritionist is not the right fit for you. You may need to seek out someone else to be in your corner. If your choice of nutritionist is limited, is there another specialty that could help? Perhaps a trainer or instructor at a local gym. Or counsellor/psychologist? A friend or relative? Someone who is going to celebrate your successes - big and small!

My suggestion would be to try for awhile to not focus on 170 and turn your attention to making small healthy changes [food, exercise, habits, stress management] -- whatever you think will help you the most. As your incorporate changes and your weight decreases, focus on how you feel physically and emotionally. The scale (with its 170) will always be there, but maybe just for awhile let it go and see where that takes you.

Clara,

Thank you for your kind message and encouragement. My primary is amazing. He actually over the last year understood the stress I was going for and even with my weight gain was still able to be supportive. At my last visit with him, he suggested that I meet with the dietician. I knew it was coming. Long story short. The surgeon that did my surgery is no longer at my practice. He left. I still keep in touch with him( as he was a friend and a coworker). However, to get set up with the dietician that our hospital uses. I needed to get reestablished with a bariatrician. This was new to me, but the office does not see patients that want to have surgery. They are more like a medical weight loss clinic. The RD, however, was the RD before I left. I see her next week. The physician that I saw, was encouraging in some ways, I do not want to negate those. At the end of my visit, we talked about a goal weight. She said that she knows that I could get back to 202ish, maybe even 195. Her reasoning was that sometimes, bodies love to be at a specific number. She said mine, might just be around 200. I was not okay with that. When I first started this journey, they actually picked my goal weight for me. The RD did. 170 is my goal, They wanted 165. After talking out my frustrations these last few days. I have realized that I have been keeping in my feelings toward this whole situation. This past week, I only weighed myself once. I also meal prepped and planned for next week. I will be shopping and prepping tomorrow. My boyfriend, even put up with us weighing food out and prepping for him too( he didn't have surgery or needs to lose the weight).

I also, as you said, plan to not look at 170 until I hit 200. Once I hit 200, If I hit 170, I will do something big for myself. I am going to concentrate on small victories first and foremost. I plan to focus on 5 lbs at a time. Part of me now has even more motivation to prove them wrong. I wasn't trying to hit 170 in six weeks. I was thinking long term.. 8-12 months. The healthy way.

We used to have a local support group that met monthly. I think I need to find out if they still do those or maybe even start one. I think that will also help keep me on track and accountable.

Thank you for your help and support

I started at 299 and I'm down to 153. I am only 5'4" and I plan to go down to 135. As long as you follow the final stage 4 diet be diligent about your water intake and do not drink while eating and get on an exercise routine there is no reason you can't do it. I also have a great support group that meets once a month so if you can find a local support you should check it out.

You can absolutely do it, even without the support of your bariatric office!

I started at 300 and made it all the way to 150, though I'm shooting for 170 as my goal post-regain. It's absolutely reasonable, as long as you stick with your plan and keep working hard.

Get back to weighing, measuring, and logging your food. Stick to your original plan-- for most of us, that's about 800 calories, under 25g carbs, 60+ g protein. Exercise is helpful, but eating is at least 80% of the effort.

I believe in you!