Looking for encouragement

I had my surgery 11/2015. I got to my goal of 135. The past 12 months has been emotionally awful. My child was burned in a fire and had to have grafts, my best friend had cancer (at 35 yrs old), and my dad committed suicide. I fell into some BAD habits, and am back up to 172. My emotions really got the best of me, and I had never had to deal with such without food, and I ran right back. I am so scared I am not going to be able to lose the weight. So, I beat myself up about the regain, and feel like a total failure in this. It's a vicious cycle that I play in my head. But, I started today, and honestly just need some encouragement. I had been grazing, eating cereal by the handfuls, eating things that were not good for me... I just need some encouraging stories of losing the regain and getting back on track. Any advice would be welcomed. It's like I am a newbie all over... I feel so lost in this process.

First of all, be kind to yourself what you have been through is rough, really rough. I hope you seek out some grief counseling.

You obviously did not regain all your weight but realize you have fallen into bad habits. Realizing where we are at is a good place to start.

First I would say get all the stuff out of the house you are drawn to mindless snacking on. With kids that can be hard, so at least put it in a closet or something- out of sight out of mind. I never like to think any food as totally off limits as that can create a mental deprivation cycle of restriction and binging but I do have what I call public foods. I only eat them in public at restaurants or parties where there is more natural portion control.

You don't need to be immediately perfect. Remember your basics- protein first, 64oz of water and no drinking for 30 minutes after meals. Personally I think higher protein is better for weight loss I always tried to hit at least 100g and yes that included a protein drink.

Breaking the myth- the idea that a certain number on the scale is our perfect goal and equates health. There is a range of normal, not one number. Even my friends who have never had a weight problem in their lives have a range of normal for them.

I have gained weight from my lowest weight but the last 15 pounds I lost was all muscle. Muscle wasting is not healthy and I did this for health. I have to remind myself I did this whole surgery to get healthy and even though I am not at my bottom number I am healthy. I also need to remind myself how far I've come.

Do I beat myself up sometimes? Oh yeah. But see above- brain messages are important.

You are not a failure, you are an overcomer - a human overcoming incredible loss. Remember it's what we do consistently that will make a difference.

Consistency over perfection.

hang in there! you have gone through so much and it might help to see a counselor. so far i have lost alot of weight but there are days and weeks that go by where i am at a stand still so i too have to go back to the very beginning. for me i don't have sugar in my house and i keep mostly veggies, fresh fruit and lots of protein around. for me if i have to snack i eat raw cucumbers and green peppers. it also helps to have a strong support system. in the past i would eat because i was sad, depressed, happy, lonely i would eat all the time but now i try to do other stuff to deal with my emotions and feelings. having a pet helps, so does journaling and having hobbies. i got a used kindle and so i read on it instead of eat. we are here to support you.

You said any advice would be welcomed. The first thing that came into my head was to pray. Even if you are not religious. By yourself or with others, including possibly a member of clergy.

The other thing I thought of was meditation. Download the Headspace app on your phone. You get two weeks free. If it helps, buy it. This was the only thing that could cure me of nightmares, including therapy.

Therapy of course helps, but it's not the answer to everything.

Sometimes you need spiritual strength, and it sounds like this is one of those times for you.

Know that eventually, this time will be over. I can't tell you if you will lose the weight or not, but eventually the pain will not be as acute. There will always be scars, but you will be able to go on if you throw your cares upon the Lord.