Honeymoon faze

Well I will tell you that I actually stopped my honeymoon faze. I could have lost more weight. I decided I could put old habits back into my life.

Weight loss right after surgery is like magic. The weight came off fast.

Four years later I have lost and I did gain some weight back.

It is amazing how much slower weight loss happens at four years out compared to right after surgery. Very slowly.

It is doable. It is a lot slower.

I know I can not go back and have a redo. I can't say I don't have any regrets.

I let old habits creep in. Lying to myself saying I wasn't eating much just thinking that a cookie here and cookie there wouldn't hurt. Or a glass of wine or a whole bottle.

Lying was one of my major defects. I can lie and twist stories thinking it was the truth if I said it enough ways.

Now I am back to eating very low carb. The first few days was hard. I feel so much better. I am not as tired.

I haven't had a drink in almost two years. For me this was my downfall.

But with the help of AA and the people on this website it has helped me.

We really have to be accountable for our actions. I could say it was stress that made me eat. Or the weather was crappy and I needed comfort food. Or it was sunny who wants ice cream?

One day at a time. One meal at a time.

There are so many who want to help here.

I find myself lying about some of the exact same things...

Rationalizing that 'taste' of this... or 'spoonful' of that...

Convincing myself 'I deserve' that treat... or even that I need it (really?!)

Our brains are our worst enemies...

Then, with this regain (6-8 lbs), I have myself convinced I'm already a failure, and that I'm fat all over again. I keep thinking I'm 244 instead of 144, and with the way I feel, I might as well be.

It's hard. The whole mind game thing is really really hard. I'm jealous of those that don't seem to suffer these mind games like I do.

Only a failure if we give up.

I feel the exact same way. I just wish my addiction to food would go away for a couple of days and give my brain and will power a little break it it just doesn't happen.

I think most of us struggle with the mental things. I know I have a struggle EVERY SINGLE DAY one choice at a time. The old me can come up with wonderful rational excuses for why I need a treat or why I don't need to exercise or make healthy choices. But I choose not to give in to the old Karen. The new Karen feels so much better and has so much more fun I listen to her instead. It's not easy but I just take it one choice at a time.

I just get tired of the struggle every single day. I'm hoping with time and practice it will get at least a little easier.

Some days are easier than others.

I have a pretty great life now.

I got you with the sloow loss.

Something that has helped my brain is to think of the foods I get to eat. Very good meat. The best yogurt. I have my little meals I eat over and over that I love. No one else in my house eats my food.

No one gets the forever honeymoon.

It happens but not like when we first started out.

I have my own food for snacks in the house.

Pretty much I make the same food for everyone. If they want something different they have to cook it.