What's on your menu today (PHOTO FRIDAY) RNYers?

OMG you're crazy - I saw that pic and thought "Julia is just the cutest thing ever!"

Right?! And she's my girlfriend! Who'da thought?

Punching above your weight?  She is super cute, but then so are you!  Lovely couple x

You're wearing a big puffy winter coat, and about 42 layers underneath! You haven't gained any weight!

Not having any of it!  You are bundled up in a million layers of warm life preserving goodness AND you STILL look super fit and adorable!  Do I need to remind you of your 'before' photos?  If you saw yourself, that photo, without knowing it was you...wouldn't you think she is adorable?  Wouldn't you have WISHED with all your heart that you could be as little as she is??

I totally get you on the 'feelz' of it. I have thoughts like that everyday. Your feelings are always valid and I respect them...but I would love you to know that those feelings are not a good indicator of the reality of your beautiful body.

F*^% the gym...you are a hottie.

~E

I appreciate it, and I am not looking for the "no, you look great" comments... I swear! I just had one of those moments when what I thought I looked like that day doesn't quite square with a picture in front of me. I used to feel like that a lot when I was MO and I am still uncomfortable with that feeling. 

It was very clear that your comment was simply you being vulnerable and open with us about your journey. Thank you for being open and sharing that.  It really helps me personally to see you, someone who is so clearly successful and truly beautiful, struggles with seeing that in herself. You help me feel like less of a failure for my own struggles with self image.

I believe that what happens inside our heads is much harder than what happens inside our pouches. I have those same feelings. Sometimes I just will look down at my thighs and all I can think for the next 30 minutes is how 'fat' I am. The inside my head negative self talk uses those same old thoughts I've used my whole life as a MO person. It makes no difference to my brain that I am currently wearing a size zero...those thighs are THUNDER-THIGHS in my internal monologue.  I ruminate on self conscious thoughts until I get distracted or make a significant effort to derail those negative thoughts.

It is better some days.  Some day it will be better most days.  Eventually I will forget how much of a struggle it all was. One day I might even love seeing pictures of myself. It is all part of the healing process, I know, but it still sucks beaver balls some days. 

~E

Amen, sister.

HOLLA! xoxo