Let's talk about our perception of food

So, when I was with my new therapist yesterday, I was talking to her about how I was eating and how I wanted to feel like I had myself under control.  I was talking to her about how much I had eaten yesterday and how bad I felt about it.  So she asked me what I had eaten, and I explained it to her.

For breakfast I had an egg cup, a packet of oatmeal and coffee with sugar free coffeemate (313 calories) at around 8am

I then ate 1 cup of plain fat free greek yogurt with half a cup of blueberries between 10 and 11. (123 calories)

Then at 11:30 I ate my lunch of 2.5oz of turkey with mayo and pickles on half a flat out wrap (169 calories)

My appointment was at 2pm, and by the time I got there I was ravenously hungry.  But as we were talking about food and my problems with it, I was feeling super guilty and bad about how I had eaten yesterday and the fact that I felt so hungry at that time.  She told me that what I had eaten didn't seem like much and that she'd be starving, too.  I mentioned that I had a tiny stomach and that I think it should be different for me.

So, what say you guys, my fellow RNYers?  I felt ravenously hungry most of the day yesterday.  Would you have felt satisfied with this amount of food?  Would you have felt bad for eating a cup of yogurt and fresh blueberries? Because I think that is where my guilty feelings were coming from, and the fact that I couldn't wait until noon to eat my lunch.   

to a "normie", that definitely would NOT be a lot of food!!  They probably would think we're nuts!

it also doesn't seem bad for someone as far out from surgery as you are.  I don't snack (except for maybe a Greek yogurt at night), but then, I make a double protein shake or latte every morning and drink about half of it mid-morning and half of it mid-afternoon, so technically, that's a snack.  So I'm probably taking in about the same amount of calories you are....

p.s.  I don't have that many calories at breakfast - but then, I have coffee with half & half almost every morning, so again, over the course of the day, we're probably about the same.

Truthfully, your breakfast would trigger me and I would feel that I was starving before lunch. I am a food addict and suffer from BED -- that meal would not work for me at all.

Additionally, the yogurt and blueberries would further trigger me.  I know, because I make my own greek yogurt and consider it a gateway food.  It's really just a glorified slider -- the blueberries, while low in sugar for fruit -- would simply be a justified way for me to add more sugar to a sugar craving.

Finally, I cannot do "flat-outs" for the same reasons.  They are triggers for me.

I cannot answer what are triggers for you.  I do know that normies often have an inability to understand how little we can and should eat -- so it can be difficult for them to relate sometimes.  

What is BED?

Binge Eating Disorder 

Deanna,

I agree that to a non-bariatric pt this wouldn't seem like much food. I know for me, yogurt is a great breakfast bec I have a hard time with much protein first thing in the morning.

I'm wondering if maybe switching that morning snack to dense protein would help you? I'm just spitballing here, you're way further out than me and have been very successful!

It would depend on the day.  Some days I would still feel super hungry other days I would feel totally full and forget to eat dinner until the family reminded me. Every day is a little different. 

I can say the oatmeal in the morning would do me in.  Mostly because it makes me gassy and likely rushing to go poo. I couldn't eat that in the morning without fear of being miserable all morning. I use oatmeal in the evenings on days when I have been bound up and want to get things moving.

Yogurt and fruit is my standard go to.  I have that most everyday and it is usually filling for several hours. Again it depends on the day though. 

I find eggs and egg cups and the like to be more like sliders for me.  If I eat eggs they just don't make me feel full for very long. I try to avoid using them in my menus because of that.  Every pouch is different though and I know for lots of folks they are super filling.

I tend to eat about 1 1/2 cups of food at each meal.  I think that is volume wise more than many folks. For me if I try to restrict to less than that I simply make myself miserable thinking about food constantly and feel starved. When I first had my surgery it was less but it has been about that volume for the past 6 months or so. I try to watch the calories and carbs and go protein first. I feel sure that if I am not cautious that volume could easily turn into too many calories and regain will get me. 

Regain feels like a boogy-man lurking in my closet. It is always about to gobble me up. I think the hyper vigilance is good in many ways but I would love to learn to relax about food and delegate it to a less constant conscious mental activity. My goal is someday to NOT think about food constantly. I am not there yet.

~E

I don't spend a lot of time with guilt. That doesn't get me far.

I would work on trying to find a way to eat that you won't be so hungry so quickly.  Oatmeal crashes on me hard. I sometimes wish I could eat it.

Non RnY folks don't really understand. 

If I am ravenously  hungry I start drinking while I'm getting something to eat. That can help too.

This is a complicated one. I'm too new to have any input, but I'm following to see what others think.