Been away and busy for a few weeks
I'm learning that I still react to stress with a desire to eat. My dad, who has suffered from Alzheimer's for about 12 years, fell a couple of days after Christmas and broke his hip. Now imagine someone who is non-communicative and frail and very confused and always frightened in that much pain, in a hospital about to undergo major surgery... and then to be back in a nursing home he is unfamiliar with a few days later... still in pain (albeit someone less since the bone was now set) but unable to do anything with physical therapy because he cannot understand or follow instructions. He still recognizes his oldest daughter and his wife of 54 years, but no one else and we are not sure if he actually knew us or just thought he knew us... he's still eating, but not very much and still drinking fluids but not like he was. Two weeks pass and we all know we are going to lose him soon. He goes on Hospice care which is a huge help for him because he gets double the nursing care and extra consideration with things like fall mats and gel mattresses and medication that is appropriate for a man who years ago had an advance directive (the only reason we went with the surgery on his leg was to reduce the pain he was in). Finally, on Tuesday night, just after midnight, he was released from his suffering.
I'm sad because I miss my dad, but it feels like all the stress associated with him is gone. And for the first time since before Christmas (because the holidays carry their own special kind of stress) my food cravings have ceased. I'm back to no eating unless it is a meal time or scheduled snack. And in just a few days, I've gotten my weight back down from it's creep (I had jumped up a couple of pounds a few weeks ago and started back on the straight no carbs routine, but was nibbling too much and while it stopped the creep I did not lose back to 146 until yesterday.
Still hoping to get down to 140ish some day. Starting a new job soon working in a commercial kitchen and that will probably do it for me as I will be on my feet much more and lifting and carrying more so getting good exercise. I find when I'm busy I also eat much less and think about eating almost not at all.
I'm so sorry you had to go through this, Alzheimers is a horrible disease....I watched it overtake my grandmother, watched my mom struggle with helping her. I fear someday I will have to go through the same thing with her and I pray that I'll have the strength she had. Emotional eating is a b***h....and a monkey most of us understand. I hope things continue to get better for you
Kelsey
Banded: 9/14/06
Band Removal: 3/15/17
Revision to RNY: 6/21/17!!!
I'd be unstoppable if not for law enforcement & physics
I am so sorry for your loss.
It is good to see you posting again. You are so right about keeping busy.
RNY Sept 8, 2016
M1:23, M2 :18, M3 :11, M4 :19, M5: 13, M6: 12, M7: 17, M8: 11, M9: 11.5, M10: 13, M11: 10, M12: 10 M13 : 7.6, M14: 6.9, M15: 6.7
Instagram:InsertFitness
So sorry for your loss. When each of my parents died they went through a long period of declining health first. It was so painful to watch them deteriorate and it felt like a blessing when they passed. I felt guilty for feeling that way for a long time. I missed them, but at the same time was happy that they were no longer suffering. Stay strong.
Surgery Date June 3, 2016
HW: 329 W at first consult 290. SW 238, LW 128, CW 139
so sorry to hear about your father. I've been dealing with the exact same thing for the last two years. We moved my dad into hospice in October, and amazingly, he's still hanging in there (amazing to the hospice staff as well!). I know that stress all too well - and the feeling that your life is constantly in limbo. I haven't felt "settled" in a long time. I, too, have felt that, much as I will grieve when the time comes, it will be mixed with some relief, even though I hate to say that.