Struggle with buying clothes

When I was MO I wanted to hide! I tried my hardest to find clothes that didn't cling to my large belly and hips. So I was limited to wearing tents basically. But now I am finding I still have a hard time picking out clothes that fit me properly. I buy something that feels comfortable and when I see photo's of myself I realize (my shirts mostly) are still way too large! They still give me that tent look. I know I need to buy smaller but I feel if it hugs my figure in the least then it is emphasizing my muffin top or excess skin. I don't know how to "SEE" myself the way others do. I ask my daughter but she just always says I look small or good. But I am not able to accept that I think because she said the same things to me when I was MO. Any suggestions? Anyone else feel this way?

I can relate to some of that. I'm really trying to "find my style." I'm 43 yr old professional woman, but I've been stuck buying whatever the "fat girl" store sell, and I think we can agree that they usually carry clothes that are more functional that fashionable. I've gone from size 26-28/3-4XL to size 8/medium, but I find myself gravitating towards "tenty" clothes that I would have worn in the past. All of a sudden, I can shop anywhere, not just the plus sized store/dept, and I'm not sure what looks good or even what fits! I have to ask my daughter things like "What kind of people shop at H&M? Is Forever 21 really just for young folks? I've explored a lot of stores and find that Macys, LOFT, and NY and Co are my favorites. I'm tending towards "Skinny jeans" and loser tops (I'm still self conscious about my stomach, and I like a little camouflage).

If I were you, I would look at what other women your age and size are wearing and decide for yourself if you like it or not. Try on a LOT of things. Shop at thrift stores so you're not spending a ton, or if you are a corporate person like I am, buy "classic" looks that don't go out of style. Also, your daughter may not be the best person to ask. Do you have a friend who is very honest? Ask her.

It should be the most fun part of the journey, but I feel your anxiety.

I see lots of things on other women of my age that look very nice, but don't seem too look so nice on me. I look all the time online and see styles I like but when I try it on it just doesn't look the same. Part of the problem is I'm very short so even finding dress's that end at a length that looks good is difficult. 

Did you ever try anything in Petite Sizing?

I do not know your size, so its hard to know what to suggest, but I found a lot of nice clothes at Christopher and Banks and although I am still a 14 in some clothes a 14 Petite would fit better for arm and leg length. I had to figure out that petite does not mean size 0 but rather just shorter in length!!!!!

I do try to buy petite clothes when I can. But for anything other than jeans and shirts I tend to only be able to find fashions that are a bit too "young" for my age. No doubt it is the stores I'm shopping at. I will have to start branching out to new stores. 

Have you tried taking pictures of yourself in the dressing room? I'm a new RNY, but whenever I have lost a large amount of weight in the past, I could only really "see" myself in pictures, not in a mirror.

I do try to do this and it helps, but I worry I still "see" myself larger than what others see. Hard to explain but I'm sure you relate. I hope with time it gets better but I'm 6 years out now so not sure. haha

Take the pic from the shoulders down. It will help you to be more objective 

yes!  The "headless" picture definitely helps

Another idea people suggest is placing a paper grocery bag of your head - then look at yourself in the mirror and snap a pic!