Your Best Advice or What You Wish You Had Known

After surgery, when you are adding foods back, EAT SLOW. you will think you are eating slow. You are not. Eat really ridiculously slowly. You can save yourself a lot of pain. I still try to eat too fast if I don't consciously think about it...if I get distracted and forget, I start wolfing, and then I'm hurting. 

hurting being a real understatement.  It feels like a heart attack.  I have had it s feral times, always when I forget and eat fast.  Does not matter how much I chew.  Eventually it has to come out to stop the heart attack feeling.  Horrible.  Avoid at all cost.

Dumping is different for everyone. For me it takes on three forms: if I eat something to rich (or too sweet) I feel nauseated but have only puked once. If I eat too much (normally because I ate too fast and wasn't paying attention), I have pain. If I eat carbs about an hour or two later I want to go take a nap. I'm actually grateful to my body for these signals as it really does help me get back on track quickly.

I did not expect my husband to be such a worry wart. Abdomen grumbling about something (gas, or whatever) he is sure I have a rupture or a blockage. Constipation for a day or two, same thing. Pain anywhere else in my body (normally from overuse), I didn't eat enough protein and my muscles are disappearing. He worries that I'm losing too much weight. He worried when I went through about a month of insomnia (nothing at all to do with the surgery, but he was sure that it did). I'm 56, had a hysterectomy 10 years ago and in the end stages of menopause so don't have much sex drive and he's sure it is the WL surgery's fault somehow. My complications immediately following surgery really, really scared him and he loves me very much, but it does get a little tiring to have someone hovering over you all the time.

How water consumption equals weight loss. I am still amazed at how my water intake effects my weight loss. If I don't drink enough, I hold on to weight or gain it back. If I push my water intake, it comes off faster. I'm not sure if it is because I'm not eating as much or if the water just flushes stuff out... bu****er is absolutely key (and decaf coffee or regular coffee is not a substitute for water, alas).

That calories have not really mattered. What mattered for me was portion sizes and WHAT I ate. In other words, I could eat fatty stuff, but not carbs and still happily lose. The minute I put carbs in my mouth, I gain or stop losing. I think I always gained on WW because it is such a carb heavy eating plan. Thankfully, my pouch really does limit my portions for the most part.

I also did not believe it when the surgeon told me I would not have hunger pangs. I'm still amazed when I start painting or weaving at 10 a.m. and look up and it's 2 p.m. and I never even thought about lunch. My body used to be an incredibly accurate meal clock. I love that it has not idea what time it is anymore.

Thank you! I'm not sure what the word with the ** is supposed to be. I get reactions to eating or not eating now so I was wondering how that might change. IBS and some intolerances. Very curious/worried what that will be like for me. 

I love the Northern Neck. We did a weekend outside of Montross recently.  Loved it!  I'm in NoVa - LoCo (Loudoun County) to be exact.

Thanks for responding!

I doubt there's ever a question that hasn't been asked or answered - some of them are asked several times a week.  The search function is a wonderful thing.

As most have said, every surgeon and plan is different.  One of the many things that I did not know is that I would have JP drains in after the surgery and would go home with them from the hospital.  It was never in any of the literature.  They were not problematic at all, but this was my first surgery, so they freaked me out a little bit.  The drains were removed 10 days after surgery at my first follow up appointment.  And my life has improved 100% since!  Best wishes to you!

Hi there,

I am going to be three years out next month - far from a vet, but trying to maintain and make good choices everyday.  I know people always say "they don't operate on your head" and man, is that the truth!  At almost three years out, my pouch is a lot bigger and I can eat virtually anything.  I continue to eat protein forward (well, ignore Thanksgiving!), not drink for at least 30 minutes after my meals, and weigh myself every single day to catch regain before it gets out of hand.  

But I knew I would forget those early days pre-op, so I saved my posts from that time.  The post below is what I posted after 4 months and 4 days when I lost 100 lbs.  God, just rereading it, I can remember the joy!  I am still so grateful every single day that I had RNY.  Put your mind to it and good luck!

****************************************************************

This post is for anyone pre-op, who is wondering, "but will this work for me?".

I was you, 4 months and 5 days ago.  I can't even say I was a failed dieter, since I had tried Weigh****chers and Atkins at various times, but for the most part, I was living large (no pun intended!).  The life of the party, I smoked cigarettes and went out for happy hours and dinners 4-5 times a week.  I didn't wake up on the weekend and go to the gym - I went to brunch!  And it had to be one with bottomless mimosas.  Since I didn't have any comorbidities, my weight just climbed up and up and up.  I had a boyfriend who loved my size and a zillion friends.

I didn't get serious about THINKING about losing weight until a year ago when I tore the meniscus in my knee.  My orthopedic surgeon told me in no uncertain terms that it was my weight that caused it.  Last May I talked to my PCP about WLS and she highly recommended RNY.  I went to an informational session in June, went through the paces (exercise test, psych eval, endoscopy, supervised program, etc.).  And then two weeks before surgery I actually GAINED weight as I had a series of "last meals" in an effort to say good-bye to pizza, thai noodles, and all of the other carbs that were slowly killing me.

I had cold feet (who isn't nervous about being cut open) but I sailed through the surgery with flying colors, had an easy recovery, and was back at work on day 7.  I lucked out physically, with such an easy recovery.  But as many people will tell you, this journey is MENTAL.

So I have lost 101.2 lbs since December 2nd.  I don't say this for accolades or for comparison purposes.  I want anyone who is pre-op to understand that YOU CAN LOSE WEIGHT if you take advantage of this tool.  Here are the factors that I maintain contribute to my success:

1. A kitchen scale.  This is a MUST, in my opinion.  I got a digital one on amazon.com.  I weigh EVERYTHING.  I cannot eyeball 3 ounces or a half cup.  I need measurement.

2. MyFitnessPal app.  I maintain a daily food diary.  I log every bite or sip that goes in my mouth.  I don't care if it's a 10 calorie teaspoon of soy sauce - it goes in the app!  

3. Low low low carbs.  I know there are many camps when it comes to carbs.  I choose to stick to 20 g per day, and I admit occasionally I go to 30 or 35.  This means no bread, no crackers, no rice, no pasta.  AKA none of my formerly favorite foods.  And sure, there are times I wish I could have a bowl of noodles.  But I think it's more important to walk up hills, to sit on an airplane and have the seatbelt fit, to not worry about sitting in a folding chair at a wedding, to be healthy...

4. I don't test my pouch.  Am I a dumper?  I have no idea.  I have not had even a bite of a cake or a lick of an ice cream.  As the vets will tell you, THIS is your honeymoon period.  Why test what I can tolerate?  I have a food plan from my nutritionist and I can assure you it does not include sweets.  Does this mean I will never have a lick of ice cream.  Hell no!  But for now, I am still in that early period of weight loss and I am sure as hell going to capitalize on that.

5. EXERCISE.  I think diet is 80% of my success, and exercise is 20%.  I am at the gym 4 or 5 times a week, doing the treadmill and working with a personal trainer.  Yes, this is an expense.  But I am no longer buying Marlboro Lights, margaritas, or nachos...so what better thing to spend my money on?  I burn at least 400 calories per workout (according to MyFitnessPal) and I do NOT eat back my calories.  So sticking to a 700 calorie per day diet and burning perhaps 400, well you can imagine this helps.  

6. My FitBit One.  I bought a FitBit One that hooks to my bra and I track my steps every single day and try to beat the day before!  My daily goal is 10,000 steps.

7. Gwinnie Bee.  Basically clothes that you "rent" for a monthly fee.  As my sizes change day by day, I can order clothes from here without commitment :)

8. Recognizing and dealing with head hunger.  After a long, and stressful day, I find myself being "hungry".  Before my TOM, I find myself "hungry".  I have learned to find new things to take my mind off of this head hunger.  I might read.  I might call a friend.  I might go for a walk.  If I can't shake the "hunger" then I might have 2 pickles.  They are crunchy, they are calorie free, and they help fill that supposed void.

9. ObesityHelp.com.  This site helps me more than my doctor, support group, nutritionist, friends or family.  I can talk to y'all on here about things like non-scale victories, lack of poop, recipes, and more.  The people on this site GET me.  I consider many of you to be friends, from far flung places on the earth.

10. Being well-aware that I don't know sh*t.  Check out the vets' posts and advice.  Some of them are 5 years out, 9 years out...and maintaining.  Maintenance is a ***** from what I can tell LOL.  I could sit here and say "100 pounds gone and I will never see them again" but we all know that many people regain.  I can already eat more than I could two months ago.  I can't pretend to know how I will feel in two months, in two years, in twelve years...

What I do know is that I have never felt such energy, such optimism, and such gratefulness [is that even a word?].  I feel like at 36 years old, my life is starting anew.  I wish the same for everyone here who is considering or scheduled for, gastric bypass.  Good luck to all of you!!! 

I forgot about Gwennie Bee!  That is a great idea!  I've been wondering how to deal with the transitioning sizes and work clothes. I will check that out again.  They probably even have a gift subscription offer - Christmas gift idea!!!

I have the scale, have been using My Fitness Pal but no tracker. I've wondered how helpful it might be.  I'd love one that checked heart rate too.

The biggest obstacle for me is likely the "head hunger". I love that term.  Very true. I munch and graze a lot. A lot. Carbs and Pepsi are my addictions. I plan on weaning off ahead of time to minimize the shock to my system.  Just can't picture "never again". This is what addicts going into recovery must feel like!  Well, obviously it is, as I am addicted to food. I can do almost anything temporarily - it's the long run I worry about.

Thanks for sharing your story!

Many of us are food addicts and feel that life after RNY is recovery, not being "fixed".  It's a day by day thing.

I would highly recommend ditching the Pepsi.  Drinking calories is just a waste :)  Also, I haven't found anything that is a "never again" (except for a few things namely rice and quinoa that do not sit well with me AT ALL).  Instead, during the losing phase I found substitutions.  Miss tacos?  Have ground turkey with shredded taco cheese, sour cream and guacamole on a spoon.  Miss pizza?  Microwave some turkey pepperoni until they are crisp and then add pizza sauce and cheese.  Now that I reached my goal, I do sometimes have tacos and have pizza.  But it's not that often, and it's not anything near the quantity I used to put away.  It's a concerted effort everyday since most of us can ultimately graze our way back to obesity with "slider foods" like crackers and cookies and stuff like that.  But as long as I fill up on dense protein (chicken, turkey, tuna etc) I have a lot less room for the crap.

So don't think never again - think of enjoying the things you love in newer, healthier versions, and then think of enjoying your favorites in much smaller quantities and much lower frequency once you reach your weight loss goals.  I have such an active and wonderful life now that I can't imagine going back to feeling sluggish and heavy every single day.  How I feel now is better than how a pound of pasta once tasted :)

Good luck!

Welcome!  I agree with what has been said by others here.  I'm not quite 4 months out and some days are more of a struggle than others - mentally.  Every morning I walk by the food trucks selling donuts, and every day I have to choose to NOT buy 1 (or more).  Physically, the surgery works.  The weight will come off initially no matter what, but continuing to lose and then maintain the loss takes a mental shift and discipline.  Some days I'm not sure I have the wherewithal to do it.  Some days I rock it!!  You'll go through the same.  Just know that you are human; that you didn't gain the weight overnight, so you won't lose it overnight either; and that no matter what - in the end you are doing what you feel is best for you to get healthy and live a better life.  Best wishes for your losing future :)