Post-Op Depression/Anxiety

Hi Everyone, 

I'm new to the board and really needed a support group. I about a month out of my surgery (RNY Aug 30, 2016) and am experiencing a rollercoaster of depression, anxiety, and regret. I have never been diagnosed with depression before, but I was a stress/bored eater that loved sweets and comfort food. I think food was a crutch and I rode many sugar highs to keep myself level.

I was originally trying to get a sleeve, but I had gastroparesus and my surgeon was concerned with a lazy stomach that a VGS wouldn't work, so he suggested RNY. My fault was not reading up on it completely, and im terrified about the dumping syndrome, which i only found out about a week out from surgery.

I get better once in a while but my mind races faster than my body so I am looking for a light at the end of the tunnel that my on and off feelings of despair and anxiety will taper off. Here are things that I bother me:

1) Worrying about things that are probably small and pointless ( in general, work [not happy with my job situation], family [taking care of my son and husband with the new diet], etc)

2) Mourning food. (I am overwhelmed at how abruptly my life changed)

3) Worried about the future (concerns with quality of life, what with dumping syndrome, etc)

Please tell me that life gets better, that I will learn to adapt to this new lifestyle and i'll be happy most of the time again! 

Yes, it really does get better. I promise. To get to better though it might not be a bad plan to get some counseling to help you through the transition to your new life.  

Keep coming on here and connecting with others who have shared experiences.  I have found this to be my support group and I don't know that I could do it without my Menu buddies.

~E

Thank you so much! I guess I need to learn patience. My Bariatric team said once I get more calories in a day, and my weight loss slows (less estrogen dumping into my system), it will get better. I think I'll definitely look into counseling and see what is available via my insurance.

The number of calories won't help with depression and anxiety. Too many bariatric teams encourage eating more, up to 1000 or 1200 calories. Ignore them. Keep your calories low. Lose the weight. These other issues will get better. Really.

I'm just 4.5 months out and it gets SO much better. I already know this is the one of the best decisions I have ever made. My arthritis, pre-diabetes, acid reflux and hypertension are gone. I'm walking about 3 miles a day and I've lost over 72 pounds.

Now as a sufferer of depression/anxiety myself, I know that the above victories don't necessarily help with your current emotions. I second Elizabeth's advice that some counseling might help. Also, your hormones go a little crazy after surgery and that REALLY affected my depression levels. I feel like I am getting back to normal. I do take medication and it makes a world of difference.

There's hope and it does get better. Hang in there.

Thank you so much for the words of encouragement and sharing your experience as I could relate it to myself. 

I myself have sleep apnea (c-pap machine user), high blood pressure (already off one medication and soon to be taken off of the other), GERD is gone. I try to keep that in all in mind, but sometimes its tough. I may just check into my counseling benefits today, if not tomorrow. 

Thank you again!

For the gerd issue alone, RNY was a much better choice than VSG. Reflux gets really bad with far too many sleevers.

Question,

So if i dont suffer from GERD, I am okay with having the sleeve? 

That's really a question for your doctor.

I'm a researcher so I wouldn't have dealt well with being thrown abruptly into a new surgery. So my first advice would be to research all you can about RNY and all that goes into it and the diet. But that's what would help me personally - I'm not sure what would help you personally.

Not everyone experiences dumping, it's actually not that common. Have you experienced it? I never have in the 18 months since my surgery. It's definitely possible so I'm not saying that it isn't, just pointing out that I haven't had it happen yet. I don't eat much sugar at all so I don't really worry about it. I do eat sugar substitutes and have fruit or agave, things like that and haven't had an issue.

I do know that as early out as you are I was very overwhelmed and worried about everything I was eating and what was going to happen. I missed food a lot.

That's not true anymore. Every once in a while I do smell French fries or something and think damn that smells good but it passes pretty quickly when I can walk all of NYC without being all that tired or I walk past the mirror and think holy crap I can't believe that's me! It gets so so so much better. I don't worry about what I can eat at restaurants now, I know that I truly can find something to eat and almost any place I go and I can judge what my portion should be without much thinking. SO I really think you could get there.

However - I also see a therapist. Because IMO almost everyone (not just us surgery people) can benefit from therapy. So if you're really struggling with depression or having a hard time dealing with things I would recommend seeing someone. Mine really helps me. This is a minefield and having someone to talk to who is a neutral party is so great and I can't say enough good things about therapy.

Good luck!