I just came out of the WLS Closet...

I just posted this on my Facebook Page to my 900 "closest" friends.  Here's hoping it helps a few of them who are struggling with weight like I was.

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So, here's the deal. I've lost 95lbs in about 6 months (tomorrow)! I still have about 20 more to go - but I'm almost there!

Many of you have sent me nice notes, and even a few posts of "How did I do it" or "What's my secret"!? So here we go...

For those of you who've known me since I was a kid, I've always been the chubby girl. I played sports like a freak, but I could also down a pizza like nobody's business. Don't worry - I made up for it with my super awesome personality, but a "petite little flower" I was not. More like a Redwood Cactus that would kill you in your sleep. Oh, I'm getting off the subject here - too much Dexter on Netflix this week.

When I was 19 I was diagnosed with a condition called "PCOS". You can google it, but it's something that about 10% of all women have (but only 5% are actually diagnosed). It does gives me super powers like the ability to lift up 250+ pound men in bars after a few drinks via crazy high testosterone levels (this surprises no one), but it also causes things like crazy weight gain that is very difficult to lose, awesome goatee level facial hair, insulin resistance, constant sugar cravings, difficulty having kids, depression, etc. This condition also puts me on the fast track to diabetes, sleep apnea, heart problems & a pre-disposition to many cancers at an early age. I hit the total genetic jackpot!! It was either this or my moms 5'11, willowy thin frame. Why take the easy route, right?!

After fighting PCOS for over 20 years, trying every diet possible, working out with little success only to give up and just eat cupcakes & nutty bars for a few months (I mean seriously - Nutty Bars are AMAZING), and then yo-yo back to anorexia where I would starve off the 10 - 20 pounds I'd recently gained - I decided I really wanted to get out of this cycle. I have a pre-teen daughter who I was setting a horrible example for, and I really didn't want her to follow in my weight issue footsteps. She's pretty, she's sporty.. She needs none of this crap!

So, I hopped on the inter-webs, and talked to my doctors - and came to the conclusion that the only long term tool that was going to help me with getting rid of the PCOS symptoms was to lose weight, permanently. Which is TOTAL CRAP, because the PCOS makes that nearly impossible. It's a total chicken & the egg scenario.

But after digging a bit deeper, I saw that a lot of PCOS patients who had done Gastric Bypass surgery, stuck with a strict low carb diet after surgery & did daily exercise had shown long term weight loss success. After a year of meeting with Doctors, PCOS Specialists & my Nutritionists - I decided this was the best decision for me.

But, I was also kind of terrified. There is a huge stigma about doing Weight Loss Surgery. Plus, I'm not a fan of things that involve "pain" (unless I'm the one doling it out). Cutting out my stomach, re-routing my innards, blood, knives, scalpels and things like that were surprisingly not on my bucket list. Upon further research however, I learned that these were all things that were non-negotiable. Bummer, dude. But, go big (already did that!!) or go home.

So, on March 23rd, 2016 - at 5am, I headed to UNMC to get gutted like a fish. I'm 5'8'', and started at 260lbs (remember - more I'm like a linebacker than a petite delicate flower). I stayed in the hospital for 2 nights, and got to take "long walks" around the hospital floor, and do 1oz shots of protein shake every hour. It wasn't as good vodka, but it would do. I was lucky to have 0 complications, very little pain, and lost over 20lbs that first month. I even went to Hyatt iLead in Atlanta for work 2 weeks later with no problems!

So why am I putting all of this on Facebook?? Well, I don't want people to think that I just woke up one day and started eating healthy and working out and stuck to it and the weight just fell off. I've tried that method MANY TIMES - and either it didn't work at all, or it was short term because I was eating 1 salad a day or less. Not healthy. Not good for the long term. Unfortunately - it was the only thing that seemed to work - at least in the short term, until the sugar cravings kicked back in like a heroin addiction and an ice cream cone happened to be in path!

Weight loss surgery has a huge stigma attached to it. Many people who do it, don't talk about it at all. It's for "older, sicker, or bigger" people than "me". If I have to resort to this, it means I'm a total failure (this was my daily self talk for months). That's definitely what I originally thought. Even after I decided to do it - I wasn't going to tell anyone. I was going to be a "Super Weight-Loss Success Story" who exercised and ate healthy and it just (finally after 30 years) fell off! But now that I've done it, I realize that it really doesn't help anyone to keep things quiet. So many people have problems with their weight, and feel guilty, depressed & isolated by it. Why add to that by making people think I have some ultra kick-ass will power that my "fat friends" must not have, instead of just being honest and just telling people my story?

I also want to add that Weight Loss Surgery is far from an "easy fix" or a "cheat" as many people say (like totally not to me directly, because they know I'll kick their asses).

First, WL Surgery is only a TOOL. I can screw this up at any time, and I am constantly terrified that I'm going to do just that. There are plenty of possible complications associated with this - vitamin deficiencies, obstructions, gall bladder problems, nutrition absorption issues, etc. - The fun is just starting!!

The surgery also doesn't fix your head & mental problems associated with food. I still want those damn nutty bars, and Godfather's Taco Pizza still smells amazing. Also, the surgery sadly doesn't include a mental implant to make working out any more "fun & exciting". (Although Netflix on the iPad definitely helps). You have to work through a lot of this stuff yourself to get your head in the game - otherwise you'll just be back to where you started, or worse.

I also want to point out that by doing this, I have DEFINITELY cheated. I've cheated McDonalds & Taco Bell out of a lot of potential future revenue. I've cheated the hospital out of potential heart surgeries, knee & hip replacements and I'm not going to be buying that sleep apnea machine now. A few pharmaceutical companies aren't going to make money on me via insulin & diabetic supplies, and I'm hoping to push the potential cancer treatments that could have been around the corner in to my 80's (let's hope). Nutty bar sales have plummeted (seriously, if you own stock in Little Debbie - sell now before they find out I did this). Torrid & Lane Bryant have lost a size 22 super-model who worked for free, and my poor kids are probably going to be stuck with me for a much longer time. And Joel is going to have to pay a lot of $$$ if he wants to upgrade to that new trophy wife (and again - I will so kick his ass).

My day now consists of about 800-900 calories (it's all I can usually choke down). Protein is always first - shakes, meat, cheese, eggs & nuts. No carbs like bread, rice, sugar or anything that really tastes good like junk food because after a couple of bites it tends to make me sick. No soda because carbonation & caffeine causes ulcers, and no alcohol for a year for the same reason. NO ALCOHOL PEOPLE! OMG. I try to stuff in a few veggies for the nutrients, and the occasional fruit if I have space. Water is a staple, and if I'm feeling fancy, I may add some Crystal Lite drops. Eating with me is liking dining with your Aunt Pearl at the Old Folks Home. It's not horrible, but the food is really bland, there is usually sugar free jello involved and it takes a while to choke everything down. I'll try not to pinch your cheeks or knit you a sweater.

I've had no pain at all, thankfully - but at 6 months out, I'm still constantly tired. When you can't eat much, don't eat carbs and can't have caffeine - you don't have much energy - and that starts to take its toll. Hoping this improves over time! ?

Stats:
Starting Weight in March '16 - 260 / size 22
Current Weight Sept '16 - 164 / size 10
Goal Weight - 150 / size 8

Weight loss surgery is most definitely NOT an easy fix, and not a solution for everyone who wants to lose weight. But, it has (so far) been a very good decision for me, and I don't regret it. Joel has been a great supporter & I'm so grateful to have had him through this! ?? you babe! The very few friends who knew I was going to do this - they were my rocks, and are still helping me daily.

If you have questions about WLS - I'm happy to answer them! If you have a negative opinion about it - I don't want to hear it, and I will cut you. ð?"ª?????

You look amazing! Congratulations on your success. I've been pretty open about the fact I'm having surgery but everyone is different. I hope your post does help others. Do you have. a blog because your post is hilarious and so easy to read. 

Haha.. I don't have a blog - I just post rediculously long posts on Facebook and force my former High School Classmates & co-workers from 20 years ago to read all of it.  They don't know how lucky they are.. ?

I love your story! And I am so jealous that you still have boobs! lol Your sense of humor and personality seem just as great as your new appearance, keep up the good work. Good luck on meeting your goal :-) 

Oh, don't think those boobs aren't pushed up & in as much as physically possible.  I'm hanging at about a B+ right now - maybe. ;)

I loved your post and you look amazing! 

Nutty Bars? Nutty Bars? Swiss Cake Rolls rule.

i think i prefer the nutty bars- eaten in rows of wafers of course!!

We have nothing further to say to each other.

So that is exactly how the package says you're supposed to eat them.... right?? 

Oh, why did we have to mention nutty bars??

Swiss rolls are good too, but I have to unroll them to eat them, and it gets messy at times...