Pre op today

my pre op appointment is at noon. I am suddenly anxious, knot in my stomach, kinda weepy. I don't know why. I have not been until now. Just lots of thoughts ....all the money we are spending on this (I am private pay...and it is worth every penny to me, but we are not wealthy people, and I keep having this little voice saying, "You know, if you would just STICK TO A DIET..."), and I guess partly it's just that this has been abstract for so long, and now suddenly feels very close and real. Anyway, just wanted to vent somewhere. Everyone has been very supportive but I am already hitting that stage where people's eyes glaze over when you talk about your surgery, lol.

Come here to vent. Unless someone has had WLS. They are clueless of what we are going through. WLS is very emotional. Our lives change. Mine has for the better. 

Ask questions here. 

I get it. Same thing here, though for me it didn't hit me until they were wheeling me into the surgery. I wanted to scream "Wait! Stop! I want to try ONE MORE DIET!"

Fortunately, the anesthetic kicked in at that moment and I woke up 3 hours later happy and on my way to a new lifestyle!

No regrets! You can do this!

Haha! That's so funny..."Wait, let me give Weigh****chers one more try! 12th time's the charm!"

Crafty Gal... LOL!  Me in a nutshell.  I kerp thinking, maybe I should try just one more diet!  Maybe if I go walking tomorrow I can finally lose weight... Luckily my day is coming shortly.

It is emotional! I don't even know why! I think that, clearly, one does not get 200 pounds overweight without having some kind of emotional issue surrounding food. But I don't really see myself as an emotional eater. I just...eat too much. I don't know. I guess once I cant eat like I do, maybe the causes will become more obvious to me. I have noticed I have a real fear about feeling hungry. It causes anxiety, irrationally. When I'm dieting, I know in my head I'm not going to die if I am hungry for a couple of hours. But it makes me feel really anxious still. I don't know why. I had a rocky childhood for sure. But from the looks of my baby and childhood pictures I certainly didn't go hungry, lol. 

As an obese person, I don't think I realized how much of our lives (mine and my family's) revolved around food. We all have some type of issue, and overeating starts off as a symptom of an underlying issue and then becomes it's own problem.

Start thinking about all the things you'll do INSTEAD of eating and what you'll do with all the money you're not spending on food or clothes that are 4x as expensive as that for people under 200 lbs! :) Having a plan is key!

i know my mother and grandmothers fed me wonderful things, like banana pudding and cake and potato salad and macaroni salad.  From when I was a small child I have associated love with food.  I also feel anxious when I don't eat.  Anxiety just builds and builds until I feel like my inside voice is screaming, and I finally give in.  

I understand completely.  Even though I planned & took classes for months, the true reality set in at the last minute.   I think I asked my hubby on the way to the hospital for surgery if I should really do this.  I'm glad I didn't back out.  Like so many I've lost 100's of lbs. in my life so loosing weight is not the big issue, it's keeping it off.  2 1/2 months post-op and I'm already feeling a lot better... knees don't hurt much, backaches and headaches are much less frequent and I can go up a flight of stairs and talk at the same time.  

Almost all of us go through this. And a year after surgery, just about every single person is kicking themselves for not having done it sooner.

Keep us posted when you're on the other side. Good luck.

Drink. Drink. Drink.