Struggling

I remember you talking about this, and you gained weight...right? 

I did gain weight.  But then it stabilized and came off, even with the new macros, like my surgeon told me it would. (I'll admit, I never got my carbs up to where they wanted, but the increase had the desired impact on my labs so they were happy and I was at a level I could live with). The regain I'm losing now was caused by my cracker addiction when my acid was at its worst.  Was it scary when I started to gain?  Yes.  There were many emails I sent to my NUT and surgeon reaching out for help.  I was lucky to have them.  But if I didn't, I would do exactly what you did and reach out here.

I don't know what the answer is, but maybe try to get closer to the newer macros.  If it doesn't work you can always go back down to get the weight off.

You aren't alone. I could have written your post. Word for word.

The struggle is real. It's always going to be hard work. I have no words of wisdom. Stick with it.

I get this!!! I haven't even had surgery yet, and I'm so scared of this. Especially when I see people who have experienced significant regain. IRL I know of 3 people who have had the surgery and regained all their excess weight.  But I also know a number of people through a local support group who have been rock stars at losing and keeping it off.

So I'm just going to focus on my weight loss and also look in to therapy if needed. I am not going to gain the weight back. I just can't.

I am a food addict. I still have times were I will binge on food. I hide when I do it. I have to just try to move on and make better decisions. I have been in therapy for 4 years. We talk about everything. 

Coming here does help. We need each other. Even though sometimes we hear things we don't want to. 

I think having a little bit of fear is a good thing. I know I am scared. I know also my tool still works. I have to measure and journal what I am eating. 

Look at the good you are doing. I know it is not always easy. We have abused ourselves for years with food. 

Make a list of triggers that you have in your life. Sometimes they are right in front of us. I have my kids hide food from me. I don't hide the alcohol in my house from me. I have more of a problem with food than booze.

Keep looking at pictures of yourself. Keep coming back. When we isolate ourselves from everyone it can put us in a tail spin. 

I tell myself I am not a human trash can. I bought cookies the other day. Thinking I wouldn't eat them. Yeah joke was on me. I got into them. Then proceeded to eat a ton of them. Ended up in bed. I felt like **** Will I do it again. I am not sure. 

You will do well coming here. We do need each other. No one can know unless they have gone through having WLS. 

One meal at a time. 

I totally understand.  I am right there with you.  I am only a few months out from surgery but I can already tell this is going to be a long hard road - especially when I can actually eat more than a half a cup of food.  I have already eaten too many things I shouldn't have.  I have no idea how people can do this and never cheat, or never fall off the wagon.  I envy them.  I am trying so hard but sometimes convenience or just my taste buds win the battle.

Please know you are not alone!

Mel, I read this string this morning, and have been thinking about it since.  Trying to come up with something to say that would help you.  I am at a loss, and so sorry that you are struggling so.  As others have said, we all understand your feelings.  We have been there.  Are there.  Will probably always be there.  We have told ourselves over a lifetime that we are failures and somehow unworthy because we were obese.  That, of course, is not an indication of our value, but we all listened to the mean girl (or guy) in are heads for far too long.  It's hard to shut the ***** up.  So, there probably isn't anything I can say to you in this moment to make you feel better, except that we understand.  We are here for you.  You are important.  We will stand with you through it all.

Melissa I cannot say anything that these veterans haven't said. I cannot add any value or wisdom to this conservation. Just know that I don't see you as a failure. I see you as poignantly honest, transparent and real. I see you post day after day on the menu thread and share your victories and losses with us. Hugs and prayers. We are all in this together. 

Reach out as you are to others for support during these times of doubt.  Also grab a size pants at a store that you use to be hold them up to you now and look in a mirror, look how far you've come!!!!! Another way to see is to load a shopping cart with bags of potatoes anything to equal the amount of weight you've lost then either pick it up or pu**** around for awhile.  Your amazing don't let that little devil on the other shoulder tell you any different.  We all understand the struggle, trust me.

I just wanted to remind you that today is a new day, we are all in this together, and we are all strong enough to do this!

stay strong skinny sister!