I'll never be one of them..

meaning a skinny person with a skinny person's mindset. I went to a BBQ tonight hosted by my sisters friend. I immediately noticed this was a skinny set of friends, men and women alike. Women were actually petite. Now, I ate fish before I left my sisters cause I didn't know what was being offered. 

They had tons of foods, typical BBQ fare. In my mind I was fighting with how hard it was not to take a plate and eat again since, technically no one knew I ate already. Then enter confusion. The skinny people kept commenting on how huge the burgers were. I looked at them thinking, there was a time I could eat two, plus one of everything else they were offering, AND dessert (twice). I almost felt like they could read my fat girl mind and felt secretly shamed. 

I tried one meatball and a small square of chocolate something-- but sipped my water most of the time. I may look the part (mostly), but good heavens the fat Girl mentality is deep rooted in my psyche.

It is hard to stay under the radar sometimes... you think they can read your mind...

I find it harder and harder 'not to eat anything' when I go somewhere. I used to be able to do that.... Good plan, and nope your not normal, I'm not normal...none of us are normal.

Never say never... Give it time...

I feel with you - I just found this quote and think it fits

Yup not easy-- but totally worth it!

also I was so annoyed with the host who kept referring to my hubby as big guy. Dude was at least 6'7" (but muscular). He better fit the term big guy then my 5'11" husband did. 

And I see me sister is creating horrible food issues in my niece, admonishing her for asking for or taking something more to eat beyond what she felt was enough. 

I bit my tongue a lot last night.

Oh that is hard to watch.... Somehow I raised a thin healthy eating son in the midst of my own craziness. Knew the right things to do, just couldn't do it. Being it was just the two of us, and Most recipes are at least for 4 people not 2 there was a tendency to keep eating because it was in front of you. If I really thought my son had had enough, I would say something to the effect like - You need to give yourself time to digest, if you are still hungry in 10 minutes you can come back for more- or something like that.... he never came back once he was distracted and onto other things.

I use the same technique with my nephew (who does have a weight issue) when he is here with us. He would eat and eat and eat if I let him, but when distracted he does "forget". 

i agree (some/most) kids do need to be told when... It's just HOW she was talking to my niece made me cringe. Made me want to sneak her another cupcake (which speaks to my own issues).

the only thing I'll get down on my kids about is drinking sugary drinks. with food i won't hide or say no too often-- but I'll suggest alternatives. 

Good for you! When I go to events it's mainly family who offer me all kinds of food. I tell them especially when it's sweet stuff it could make me dump and they wouldn't want to see that. I've never actually dumped but it works. I get the fat girl mentality. I wear a 4 and still feel like I'm the biggest one in the room!

Good job. The mental part is still the hardest for me, too. I think things will get easier for you as time goes by. I do pretty well but now I will indulge a little here and there at social gatherings, then I just get back on track the next day.

I never use my surgery as an excuse (I do not want the conversation to start about surgery- the social gathering is not about "me"). If people try to push food, I just tell them I will get some later or if that does not work I say I do not want it (no "can't", "shouldn't", etc., which can lead to more pushing). You will find what works for you.