What if I fail?

I am in Ontario so have as much as a year to wait before my surgery.  A few weeks ago my doctor told me I'm pre-diabetic and asked me to have my blood work checked again in 3 months. I then had the blood work done that's required by my clinic.  Now he wants to see me again, and I'm sure that it's the blood sugar. And I haven't been eating right - even though I know I need to be.  I've lost and gained weight so many times, and this morning, the thought that keeps coming to mind is "What if I do all of this and fail?". 

I feel like I am committed to the process, and that I will do whatever I need to to make sure I'm a success- but how did I let my health get to this point?!?!?!

I have definitely had that same fear.  You are not alone.  I spent many hours looking at before and after photos and trying to convince myself that I could be like one of those amazing people. I still fear the possibility of failure sometimes.  I've lost weight before only to gain it back so I worry that could happen this time.  

For me the difference is that now I feel like I know more about food, my body, what eating just for fuel feels like, and that ultimately I have the ability to maintain this.  All my life my weight felt like an external force pressing on me. I felt so powerless.  Now I feel empowered to actually pilot my body where I want it to go. Reclaiming my body has given me a feeling that I can choose to do well and all my life I have wanted to choose health.  Now I know that I can and I believe I will.

You can and you will do this. Trust yourself and trust the process. 

~Elizabeth

Thanks for the encouragement!

I've never been good at eating right.  When I was young, it didn't much matter, I stayed around the same weight until I was in my early 20's.  Life got the better of me and I started eating my emotions.  

I had RNY last year and I'm still at a place where failure is a real possibility.  I have some significant issues with food and see a therapist regularly to help me keep things in perspective.  There is a chance I may fail at this.  I can't see the future to know how I'm going to be 2 years from now.  But I can tell you this.  I definitely would have failed if I had never took the step and did it.

I think, at least for me, I have to immerse myself in this life.  I have to BE WLS.  I talk about it, I plan my food, I talk to other people in the community, I talk to my family about it.  EVERYTHING is about my new healthy lifestyle.  I just have to do that now, or I'll backslide.  At 10 months post op I can promise you that if I just decided to give up right now I could easily gain all of my weight back within a year.

NO one is guaranteed success with this, it takes a lot of focus and hard work.  It also takes the ability to humble yourself and accept a kick in the ass when you screw up.  I was so prideful when I started this journey.  I knew what I had to do and I didn't want to hear it from anyone else. But then I started thinking about it, and about how the people who were kicking my ass had actually succeeded at what I was trying to do.  They'd lost the weight and maintained.  OR, they'd lost the weight and regained and were now struggling to lose it again.  They KNEW what to do, and I needed to learn from them.

I'm not saying that you're not willing to take the hard advice, but I do want to put it out there because I know for me it was a hard pill to swallow, and I know for a fact that if I hadn't humbled myself there is absolutely no way I'd be able to be successful long term.

It's entirely possible to succeed at this.  You just have to find your way to it.  The most important part is to never give up.

We are the same age, same height and same start weight lol. Thanks for the encouragement.  It kind of hit me today and I still have months to go!

Just think, while you have months to go, you have time to practice.  You're going to struggle.  If you could do it before surgery on your own you could just skip surgery and stick to the diet, right?  But, the important thing is to stop it immediately when you realize where you've gone.  Never give up the day because of a slip.  Get back on track the next meal.  Or don't give up a week because you made a bad choice one day.

Always reset, always start again.  It's a struggle, but it's so worth it.  My weekend sucked.  I may have grazed on potato chips most of the day on Monday.  I had 3 glasses of wine that day as well.  No wine last night.  Very low carb today.  I reset and I'm starting over today.

I can't wait to see how well you do after surgery!  You're going to rock it.  Once that weight starts coming off, you'll feel like a million bucks and that will help to motivate you.  

Hi there!

So, what if you do this and fail?... then you "try" again... What if you don't do this at all? Then, you haven't even "tried." 

I cannot stress enough to people how important it is to have your mental health ready prior to surgery. Being mentally prepared goes a long way. Part of that is the food that you eat pre-op. I am not saying that you need to give up everything beforehand, but making wise food choices now, is a lot better than getting stuck after. The more little routines you can get into now, the better. ie.: smaller portions, less calories and exercising. All these can help. 

Life after WLS is about focusing on the positive in life, and enjoying it. 

Just remember, enjoying your new post-op life does take planning, but it is well worth it. 

Stay positive and be mentally prepared. 

Cheers,

Skotti 

" it is impossible to live without failing sometimes, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not lived at all, in which case you fail by default~ Jk Rowling 

I heard from a wise woman recently that it takes 66 days to learn a new habit, or change a habit.  Choose one little thing now and change it.  You have the time to make the changes.

But just what if ......you do all this and you DONT FAIL.   What if everything goes perfectly and you end up living the life you've always wanted and dreamed of.    

I get it.  I thought the same thought.  I have failed soo many times at the "weight game".....why should this time be any different???

Well........that's a valid question with no certain answer.  But I will guess that this was a last resort for you as nothing thus far has worked.  If you are now pre-diabetic, you will need to adjust your lifestyle and diet regardless of surgery. Quite a wake up call I imagine.  Diabetes was a fear of mine as my mother has it.  It was one of my many motivators in this decision. 

I believe if you want something bad enough...it can be achieved.  If you want to keep it bad enough...you WILL maintain it.   The answer lies in you and you alone.  You cant change the past, but you can build a better future and possibly reverse you pre-diabetic status.

   You CAN do it !!!!!