Mirror Mirror on the Wall

Jusgt wondering if anyone can identify with me.  Before surgery, size 18 pants, I would not look in the mirror very often. I rarely wore make-up.  But....when I did look in the mirror, I would look for something redeeming about myself.  Suck in my gut, lift my torso, and take a quick glance that could be something slightly flattering and walk away with a happy gait and something sweet in my mouth. 

For several months after surgery, I was happy with the changes in my body and started wearing makeup and got my hair highlighted. I started to feel good about myself.

Then came the period of unbelief.  People were telling me how good I looked.  I felt better, and now wasn't afraid to look in the mirror, but still a little disbelief.

Next came the period, when I looked in the mirror and saw all the flaws.  I could see the weight loss, but I noticed the hanging skin. I noticed where I could lose more weight. I was unhappy looking in the mirror.

I went shopping yesterday and bought a pair of shorts in size 3. I can't believe they fit me.  I look at them, I stare at them.  I struggle and get them on.  How can they fit me.  I feel so fat.  I am a mini-me, but still me.  I am almost 60, I do not have the body of a young girl.  But I am now thin.  Thank God!

Working on looking in the mirror and being happy with what I see. Still want to lose more weight as a cushion, but  I am comfortable here.

So, did you experience the same trend and did you become satisified with the results???

Lynn,

I totally can relate to your feelings. My entire life since I was in high school I have wanted to be thin. Now I am and I am not always happy. What is it about being a woman, that we are never satisfied. I am wondering if we are not the only ones. It will be nice to hear from our other OH friends. 

Robin

Hi, I can understand how you feel.  I am getting close to my goal but still feel way overweight.  I feel much better, can do so much more but still have the mentality of an overweight person.  I still hesitate when I have to do something that before I struggled.   I forget that I don't have to worry about getting in a tiny chair or would I fit in a booth or even crouching without effort.   In my mind I would still struggle forgetting I am not that same person.  Its been a transition for sure that I am still working on.  I see the difference in the mirror but my brain still needs to catch up :) 

My husband never commented on my weight loss.  I was well below goal, had had a tummy tuck and was wearing size zero.

I knew that I looked good, but the mirror still showed me a fat person. 

Then one day I heard my husband telling a friend that when he looked at me now he felt like he was married to Miss America.  For some reason hearing that allowed me to really see the new person in the mirror.

that's so beautiful.  

I can totally relate to this.  I have gone from a 3x-4x to a size large top and 26/28 pants to a 14 and look in the mirror and still see FAT.  I know I've lost weight but I still see flaws as you say.  I know its a mind game because everyone says how fantastic I look.  Its emotionally hard.

I can totally relate!!!!  I think we are similar point in our journey. I am 21 lbs away from my goal, I have lost 81 lbs.  Intellectually I get I look better, in clothes that is.  When I look in the mirror with no clothes, I just see a slightly smaller version of the body I have hated for so long!

No one in my family has commented strange, but everyone at work has commented both reactions are strange for me.

What I also don't get is still having "fat" days, what is that about? Just a few days ago I had a "fat" day, and I remember trying to process this thinking "How am I 81 lbs down, sitting at a weight I haven't been since high school 20 lbs from goal and I still feel fat?"  

Can any veteran's help with this?  Grimm?  Laura in Texas?  Any thoughts or wisdom?

At the same time, I want to stay vigilant until I hit my goal, then when I hit goal I believe I will want to stay vigilant to continue to be at my goal.

Anyway I understand!!

I can totally relate! I think being fat all my life it is so hard to see myself as not. Yes when I look in the mirror I see the batwings, the flabby thighs and the flab on my belly....when I have no clothing on. But clothing hides a multitude of sins...lol when fully dressed I most of the time feel better and think I look pretty good. But when I go to do something or sitting around....I still think in my head that I am a large person. Lately though when I look at my wrist....they really look so tiny. And they are! With that being said ..... I go to the standard that I am really small framed and wonder will I ever get to the lower end of my bmi normal chart? My goal now is to just get to the high end of it. In the past My PCP set my weight goal 10 lbs above my normal bmi and I made it there on WW and felt with my body and age I would never get below that. Well I am now 10 months out from R&Y and today 1 lb away from that weight goal and I feel now...I will get below that! :) I now have added a goal of wanting to go 15 lbs below that So I can say I am in a normal bmi! Will I feel I am no longer fat then? Will I like what I see in the mirror then...I think I will probably still feel the same way I do now! But I still feel better about me. Gaining the weight back when I lost it on WW was really an eye opener to me.....I felt worse about me after that than I did my whole life of being fat. I was determined to have this surgery then and have the tool that would help me fight the battle and keep this weight off this time.

I too have a wonderful husband but he never comments on my weight loss. We have been together just going on 4 years..and when we meet I had not packed on all the weight I had lost on WW...still had most of it off. But after we married I packed back on about 85 lbs of the 108 I had lost from WW. He never once said anything about that gain either. (He really is a wonderful man that said in the beginning what size a woman was never bothered him and you should see the little squirt himself...lol) With that said when I decide to have surgery..he said my weight did not bother him..that is when I stopped him and told him I was not doing this for him....this was for ME!

I know I babble on and on. But  think we just need to except that we may never see ourselves or feel we are not fat...but just know we are not anymore...that people don't see us as fat. That we can do things now that when we were fat we could not! That we can put on small clothing and they fit....enjoy when you put oh something that is to big!! :)

We got this and we are rocking it!!

I had my surgery over three years ago and most of the time now I see myself as a thin person. It took a long time though because I had a lifetime of being o ese. I started at 272 and never expected (nor did my surgeon) to get to 120 but I did! My mother told me my whole life that I was large boned but guess what? I have tiny wrists and collarbone I never knew were there. I still hate seeing myself without clothes because of all the saggy skin and don't know if that will ever change. But I know I look thin in my size 0 pants! I guess we are all a work in progress!

I struggle with this, more so than ever. I have lost 140 lbs in the last 10 months, but there are days and I just want to scream "why am I still SO fat!" But the I get glimpses of myself in the mirror or a window and think "wow!" 

Someone on here suggested looking at our body where we can't see our face (take a picture or a bag over the head). I find that to be really helpful. 

I look forward to seeing what other suggestions people have.