Waiting for my RNY date butI am getting a little freaked out!

Hi everyone,

I am waiting on my date, but I am getting a little nervous and freaked out.

I am afraid I won't be able to do it, I am afraid I will mess up and get really sick, I am afraid I won't drink enough water, I am afraid of the liver cleanse, the one week liquid diet. Dumping and especially the foamies. (I have a bad hernia and terrible Reflux and Gerd, that is why I am having this done.) My Dr. (Dr. Bobby) said while he has to go in and fix my hernia he wants to do a RNY as well. I always had "maybe I will one day look into weight loss surgery" in the back of my mind, but I never thought I was heavy enough for a doctor to want to, let alone suggest and strongly recommend it. 

My BMI is 35 and I am or was 210.lbs at 5'2" I know it's on the border but I am pre diabetic, with horrible GERD and sleep apnea.

I have done all the pre-testing, had the psych evaluation, been to the seminars, saw the dietician, lost the 10 pounds I was told to before surgery (I actually lost 19 in 23 days so far ). I went to the exercise class, and I will be attending the next support group. I was pre-approved boty my insurance, now just waiting on final approval and they will give me the exact date. It will be in Jan. but I don't have the exact date yet.

My good friend had this done and she looks fantastic, and she is so happy with it. (She is a nurse so I think that helps) 

I know it will benefit my health, prevent full on Diabetes, and help me live a longer more productive life. It will also help with my low self esteem and confidence. 

I am afraid I will not succeed. I will be sick all the time and miserable because I can't have something stupid I will crave. The hardest of all is the caffeine and coffee. I have been trying, I love coffee. I cut back to 1 cup a day of 1/2 caff as I was drinking 8-12 cups a day. I am so tired its hard to stay awake. The migraines went away but now I need a laxative.

I read all the info on here, and I see that 90% of you all are happy with it.

The only thing I am not afraid of is gaining the weight back, that wont happen. 

Were you all scared, having second thoughts? Freaking out about possibly being sick?

(I am practicing, not drinking and eating, drinking lots of water, chewing 30 times, small bites and taking my time)

Sorry this is so long,

Barbara

I know the feeling.I am revising from a failed lapband to RNY...all your worries are similar to how I feel.Will this work for me....

I was very scared too.  I cancelled my surgery on the Friday before my scheduled Monday surgery.  Needless to say my doc was not happy.   Luckily before all my tests and psyche eval expired I decided to try again.  They got me right in for another pre-op and was warned by my doc that if I cancelled again he would not let me come back.  I was too afraid of him to cancel again and I went through with it.  The first day was no problem because I was on IV with meds.  The second day they took me off all the IV meds and I was nauseous.  I am agoraphobic so I freaked out and wanted to leave the hospital.  I didn't sleep the 3 days I was there.  My bladder froze up and they wouldn't let me leave until I peed.  I thought it was the biggest mistake I ever made.  I finally got my bladder working on the afternoon of the 3rd day.  I stopped taking the pain meds which were making me nauseous.  When they checked me out I was the happiest person in the world.  Then I got in the car.  Palo Alto in the afternoon was bumper to bumper all the way to San Francisco.  Over the Golden Gate in rush hour traffic was agonizingly slow.  It took 8 hours to get home from a 4 hour drive.  I was never happier to see my home.  Once I got home there was no way but up.  Every day was an improvement.  In a few weeks it will be a year since I started this journey and it has been one of the best decisions I have ever made. 

There are definitely worse stories than mine...complications that I can't even comprehend.  Most are still glad they made the decision to do this.  I wasn't extremely obese (even though I was classed as morbid obese). A Cardiologist I saw before my first scheduled surgery said I was pleasantly plump and didn't need the surgery (one of the reasons I cancelled).  I had acid reflux, high blood pressure, elevated cholesterol, pre-diabetic, and have a hiatal hernia.  These are the reasons I decided to go ahead and do it.  I hope you seriously consider doing this and how you will benefit just like most of us here.  thanks, Denise

Thank you so much. It makes me feel better that you felt the same way and look how far you have come

I am 5 years out and I haven't dumped or had the foamies since my first year.  The reason I haven't dumped is because I don't eat things that will make me dump.  I never intended to test myself to see if I did but I found out anyway when I accidentally ate something that wasn't sugar free like I had thought it was.

Believe me I won't make that mistake again.  It wasn't pleasant but knowing I dump isn't the end of the world.  It gives me added incentive not to return to my bad eating habits.

The first year can be a bit rough and it is a major learning time but before long it will be your new normal.

One thing I will caution.  You said you aren't afraid of gaining the weight back.  A little healthy fear is a good thing.  I speak from experience.  When I had my first WLS in 2002 I really thought I would never be fat again.  At that time people would say things like "One hundred pounds gone forever!".  I believed that.  Now I realize there is no such thing as forever when it comes to losing weight.  

I regained 100 lbs and learned that if I don't make changes this time it can happen again.  It's funny, the first time I never worried about regaining and I did.  This time I worry about it and I haven't, at least so far.

Don't get me wrong, I don't live in fear.  I know there are far worse things then gaining weight.  But I acknowledge the possibility and respect that and that helps me stay on track.

Very nervous of not succeeding both before and right after the surgery. "Am I the only one who isn't going to lose weight??"

My surgeon never restricted our caffeine, although I realize some do. 8-12 cups a day is a lot...if I am reading that right. I am only supposed to count 2 cups a day towards my fluid intake.

Practicing is good, but it is easier to actually do once you have the surgery.

You maybe on the lower end of the BMI scale, but you have several medical issues that could be improved or resolved with surgery. Feeling better and having your health makes it easier to make good choices after surgery.

It's a BIG decision and I'm sure most of us debated a bit... and had a lot of the same worries... most of them just sort of take care of themselves... chewing for one... you will learn your body post-op and how many chews you need, that ouch feeling when you eat too big a bite sort of self regulates that and soon... it becomes automatic... the first few months... some thinking, trial and error, but after that... seriously life is pretty normal (new normal, but normal) 

9 years = dumped (for me heart raising, sweating, nauseous, lasting 1 hour-ish) less than 10 times. Puked = less than 5.

Most of us only have to give up caffeine and coffee for a few weeks at the most... I drink fully leaded coffee, cleared at 1 month. Some people have to wait 8 weeks... some were drinking it out of the gate... so Dr's vary on this.

Hopefully your GERD and Apnea will be resolved (mine was and both were severe) and that will help MAJORLY with your tiredness. Plus... we supplement with B12 post RNY so a little energy with that too.

It was the best decision I ever made... 0 regrets. 

I love your confidence about the not gaining weight back... though that can happen so be sure you take the first year to really make changes you can live with forever, not just something you are getting through to a goal weight because that scale does go both ways still... and work on your WHYS... what are the emotional components to your obesity. Those do not go away with the pounds and must be addressed IMHO if you want this to really stick.

Best to you,

Yes, I was scared because WLS is major surgery.  No, I didn't have second thoughts because it no longer felt like a choice.  No, I didn't freak out about being sick because I figured it came with the deal. 

I think the most important paragraph you typed started with the words, "I know..."  I think the one thing you aren't afraid of is more common than the things you are afraid of.  I think WLS should be your decision more so than Dr. Bobby's.  I think I've said enough; all the best to you.

The only thing I worried about was regain.  My surgeon advised m to go 10, 20 or even 30 pounds under my goal during the honeymoon phase of RNY when weight comes off effortlessly.  I was too skinny for about a year and just enjoyed wearing size 0.  When Bounceback happened it was quick and I was glad I had been under goal.

For the rest of my life I will go without caffeine, I will suffer if I eat sugar, I will weigh daily and take action when the scale goes up.  I will plan my meals, track my food, exercise, drink my water and do what I need to keep myself regular.

There are things that I would like to eat that I don't eat.  I find substitutes for some things, others I just live without.  My worst fear is still of gaining back my excess weight.