Feeling confused about my body's quick changes...anyone else?
Since my surgery I have been losing weight at what feels like a very fast rate. Last week at my 2 week post op visit I was down 33 pounds. I have avoided the scale since then but I see the difference in the mirror and in my clothing.
Already nothing fits except that 'stash' of clothes from years ago that I held on to with the wistful thought that "someday these will fit." This week even the 'stash' is fitting loose and will probably not work for long. Just before surgery I was wearing a 22 in jeans but now my old 18s are so loose I can pull them on without unbuttoning them.
Every time I see my hands or catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror I feel weird about it. I don't feel sad or upset, it just feels unreal. I can't quite accept that that person is really me. It feels like this is all happening faster than my brain can adapt.
Anyone else have that sort of feeling about the changes they have gone through? Does it go away over time?
Thanks!
~e
Consultation weight: 265, Surgery date: 10/6/15, Goal: 150, Current weight: 129; 5'5, 46 years old
"I am basically food's creepy ex-girlfriend. I know we can't be together anymore but I just want to spend time hanging out" ~me, about why I love cooking so much post WLS
on 10/26/15 9:58 am
I've been experiencing this same "unreal" feeling. The last time I was at my current weight was well before puberty, so I literally have no previous experience with this body. I get a little creeped out seeing my hands, collarbones, shoulder blades, neck muscles and tendons, etc. I had a "stash" of clothes too from when I lost 80 lbs in high school, but the smallest of those were 14-16s, so I finally got rid of the 12-year-old clothes, lol. I've asked this same question on here, and some of the vets have said it took a year or more for their self image to catch up to their bodies. It still seems unreal though when I buy pants in a 4 or 6 because I still feel like the girl who was wearing 22s and 24s. Also, if I'm wearing pants in sizes 4 to 10 while still at 165 lbs, what in the world do skinny people wear?!
Thank you for your reply! Yes! For me I noticed the bones in the tops of my feet the other day and it was really weird. I honestly can't remember ever seeing the lines of the bones in my feet...I've always had too much puffiness.
I was telling a coworker the other day that I had not been under 200 pounds since I was 18 and that it was bizarre to even think about what it might feel like. My coworker was sweet and nodded but I could tell she had no idea what in the heck I was talking about.
It feels good to know I am not alone!
~e
Consultation weight: 265, Surgery date: 10/6/15, Goal: 150, Current weight: 129; 5'5, 46 years old
"I am basically food's creepy ex-girlfriend. I know we can't be together anymore but I just want to spend time hanging out" ~me, about why I love cooking so much post WLS
on 10/26/15 1:23 pm
Just after posting this, at lunch today at work, I noticed a vein sticking out of the inside of my right forearm that creeped me out. My coworkers think my freak-outs over my own body are hilarious. I also hadn't been under 200 lbs since I was 18, and even then was for a VERY short period of time. Most of my adolescence was 250+, and most of my adulthood up until this point was 280-300. It's a total mindtrip.
"I get a little creeped out seeing my hands, collarbones, shoulder blades, neck muscles and tendons, etc."
- I DON'T! I recognize that this is SUPPOSED to be what I look like. Then I look at Kathy Lee, Kelly Rippa and other TV anchorwomen for the news and notice that I look....LIKE THEM! They got collarbones! I got collarbones!!!
And then I am happy and can jog at least 3 more miles on the thrill alone.
My admiration of my collarbones, tendons, smaller hands is what drives me to make the RIGHT CHOICES and do the RIGHT THINGS when my will wants to wear out.
RNY Surgery: 12/31/2013;
Current weight (2/27/2015) 139lbs, ~14% body fat
Three pounds below Goal!!! Yay !
on 10/27/15 9:20 am
I hope to get to that point someday! I'm also discovering I had a fairly small frame hiding under the blubber all these years (my work BFF calls me a "tiny framed human"), so it's even creepier to compare my ribs to those of my mammoth husband. He says it's like chicken ribs compared to a slab of beef ribs.
I know what you are talking about, I'm just two months post op today and I caught a glimpse of my reflection in the glass door of the supermarket over the weekend. I stopped suddenly because I didn't recognize myself. I'm hoping that the people around me thought I was looking at the food in the case otherwise I probably looked like a loon. It was a very strange experience.
Seminar Sept 2014 - 221
First 6 month weigh in - November 2013 - 220
Surgery Day 8/26/15 - 199
Current Weight (9/1/16) 128.0 RNY 5' 2"
If you think it's weird now, wait until you're about six months out. It's one of those weird, but really good, feelings.
--
150 lost and maintaining!
THis is just the beginning! And yes it does take time - for some of us years- to own our new body. Yes it is weird, yes it is fast and it can be a real head trip in ways that are unexpected.
I am only 2+ years out and I still find it strange how little space I take up and how tiny my shadow looks when I catch a glimpse. Try to just go with it if you can. It is part of the journey and it can be very exciting!