5 months out and already see the demon inside

I am an "all or nothing" thinker. Not the best way to be. I have noticed that before I stuck to my plan, but now I have been winging it and I see my old habits sneaking in. I am scared to death to gain my weight back. 

How does everyone cope with the constant struggle of keeping the demons away that kept us fat?

That depends on which "demon" you are referring to.  I suffer(ed) from "Stinking Thinking." My husband can eat anything and I thought I was doing him an injustice not having things that he liked in the house.  Needless to say, that led to eating things I shouldn't in amounts that I couldn't. I am six years out and finally, I have said no more! No more junk in the house.  If he wants it, he can buy it...and keep it in his truck!  I also have issues with boredom and eating, anxiety and eating, etc., etc., etc., you really need to face what it is that drives the feeling that you need to eat when you really don't.  It's all been said before, find something to do: walk, call a friend, read a book, but break the cycle. I joined Weigh****chers again and this time I hear what is being said.  I haven't missed a meeting since I started in January of this year.  Have I done it perfectly? No. Am I making progress? Yep. AND that is the goal.  "Progress not perfection."

I'm pre- and I was struggling yesterday at the grocery store shopping. I walked by a package of Hershey bars and thought that is a great price and in my mind I thought, I could shove two of those in my mouth so fast. But I can't, now AND later.

I wouldn't consider myself what in my mind is a binge eater where I eat 2 pizzas, but I am an emotional eater and stress eater and need to work on that as much as I can before surgery. I know it will be a daily choice I make.

I try to stay away from carbs as much as I can, some do lead to more carbs, and sugar.

One good thing is you noticed this behavior. So that is the first step. Read and post on the forums they do help. You can talk to someone who didn't have WLS and they have no clue what you are going through. We all understand. Somethings you may not like what you hear but sometimes it is the honest truth. The vets that are on this site are very helpful. 

Find a good therapist. Use the myfitnesspal app to keep track of what you are eating. I am almost 2 years out and I have seen and not forgotten some of my really bad habits. You need to stop winging it. You already know that. 

Think about why you had surgery and how your body feels now. Set some goals for yourself.

I see my therapist once a month sometimes two times. I have been a food addict most of my life and it is very easy to fall back into habits that are abusive to our bodies. We have learned most of our lives that food does comfort but it also makes us obese. 

Make a list of things you want to do as a thin healthy person. When you look at the good it does help. I try to remember it was a harder life being obese. So when I think that staying on plan is hard. I think about how it sucked when I went out and didn't fit in a booth or I worried I couldn't sit on plastic furniture. Or I had to bring my own chair to a party.

I am sorry for rambling. I hope you can find a way to stop old habits.

Best wishes to you. 

I find it to be a constant struggle, too.  (sigh)  Here's some of my coping strategies for what they're worth:  1.  immerse myself in WLS successes like following food guidelines, daily journaling, exercise, and support group.  2.  avoid people, places, and things that trigger old habits like a controlling parent, fast food joint, or known transfer addictions  3.  draw myself to things that keep me mindful like health seminars, clothes shopping, and frequent salon appointments   4. watch or read stories about obesity easily found on the internet  5.  pay it forward like replying to questions on OH 

I'm 6 years post RNY.

I find it helpful to keep a food journal twice a year - each time for 2-3 months.  I write down every bite or drink and total the calories, grams of carbs, ounces of fluid and grams of protein.  My bariatric program for maintenance is about 1200 calories and I aim for 100+ ounces of fluid and 80-100 grams of protein.

I find it so helpful.  I, historically, slowly allow foods high in calories but low in nutrition back into my eating or snacking and writing everything down makes it REAL.

Getting back on OH and reading, and posting what you're eating today is helpful.  Calling or emailing your bariatric dietitian and taking a food log to your next appointment is a good idea.

Attend a support group of some kind.  Find an accountability partner.

I've also found it helpful to read about health and nutrition.  You can click on my name or my avatar picture for a long list of books I've read and found to keep my thinking on track.

I also weigh daily.  If I see a trend of my weight going up - I start the food diary.  I get tempting foods that may be high calorie but low nutrition (chips, crackers, ice cream,candy, SF treats, etc.) out of the house.  I put down garbage disposal - so I can't, in a weak moment, go rummaging through the trash to get them back out!! (Sad, but true)

I just can't "wing" it without gaining weight.

Best wishes,  

Penny

Outstanding, excellent, wicked good advice.

Oh my gosh--I'm going to print this out!! I love this advice. I'm only 3 months out but love that this is definitely a long term plan I can embrace. THANKS!!

I made the decision to follow the rules no matter what, and that is what I do.  I could never "wing it".  If I did I would be right back up to 270 pounds.  I don't allow crappy food into my house.  I do the shopping and my husband eats what's in the house or he goes out on his own to buy his Doritos.   I am a creature of habit and tend to eat the same foods daily and I eat by the clock.  I never use my "full" sensation.  I measure my portions out and eat only that amount.  I eat a very small meal (200-300 calories) 6 times, daily. That's my new normal.  

When I am out of my routine, I make smart choices and feel good about myself for having that kind of control over my food addiction.  I refuse to let food control me.  I have often said that to be successful with WLS you have to completely change the way you relate to food.  I look at food as nothing more than fuel for my body.  I no longer use it to sooth, relieve stress or boredom, celebrate, etc.  

It took me 1.5 years to reach goal.. during that time I weighed/measured/logged my food to keep on track. once I hit goal for 6 months after I weighed/measure/logged my food so I could make sure I could maintain my loss. I am now 9 years out...  I weigh daily... if the scale goes up 5lbs that's my trigger point to re-evaluate myself and make better food choices and make sure I have no slacked on exercise.

If you know what your old habits are you need to try and "fix" them... you didn't state what they were but if you were a stress eater, you need to figure out another way to relieve the stress besides eating - exercising, meditating, reading... etc. You have to find other healthy things to substitute whatever you have been using the food for.

I went to therapy pre-op, I also did a lot of work on myself post-op identifying behaviors and working on changing them. We all slip up now and then... as long as you realize, accept it and move on from it you will be successful.