IRL support group last night

I was able to go to my first support group last night and I'm glad I did, it was nice to be in the same room with people struggling with the same thing I've struggled with my whole life.

However this month it was led by a nutritionist that is the counterpart to the nutritionist that was mine - who I didn't go back to because I didn't agree with her advice since it included crackers, pasta, rice and bread pretty early on. 

So she was talking about a few different things and she brought up plateaus and asked if anyone had gotten to any and I said I've kind of been on one for about 2 - 3 weeks now. She said oh definitely go see your nutritionist. Later we were talking about how much we were eating, just in casual conversation and I said I'm eating 2 ounces and between 500-700 calories a day. She said oh there must be something wrong, there is no way you should be at a stall for 2 weeks if you're eating that little! She made me feel like such a freak in front of everyone else and it wasn't like I was asking for advice, this was mostly in a conversation with the other people in group. It was so frustrating because I enjoyed the group and want to go back but I really hated being put on the spot like that. I know I'm following the rules - I'm tracking what I eat, I'm under for carbs, I'm in a good calorie range, my protein is good, I'm taking my vitamins, I'm drinking water. Her saying something is wrong without knowing anything just pissed me off!

Plus throughout the night she mentioned eating bread, pasta, rice and crackers early on too. Which reminded me why I don't want to go to my NUT. She kept saying throughout the group how the only way to be successful is if you do followups with you NUT but if your NUT is telling you things that you think aren't going to lead you to be successful that can't really be true? I believe it if your NUT is a good one though. Argh.

She is as nutty as the other one. 

I have found out that I am a stair step loser. I can eat the same exact foods every day and lose nothing for a week or two and them bam down 5 lbs.  Then it happens again nothing for a week or two and bam down again.  I have no issues with how I am losing. Slow and steady wins the race.

Make sure you take measurements as we all seem to lose inches even when the scale stays the same.

You sound like you are right on track with things and good for you for not taking the crappy advice of these two nuts who seem to want to push carbs on new WLS patients. 

I like the stair step idea - I'm hoping that's me too :) It may have been you that mentioned this the other day where I heard it on here but it stuck with me and now that's going to be how I think of it. We'll see! I weight every Monday. 

I take measurements every once in a while but nothing seemed to have moved there either so I stopped because with nothing moving anywhere I was getting too pissy at everything. I decided to focus on following all the rules and go from there. I'll measure this week and see if anything changed though.

I also want to compliment you because you seem to really have a great head on your shoulders.  You aren't doing anything wrong -- and in fact, you seem to have the kind of mindset that not only loses the weight but maintains it.  It's really hard to keep the faith while we are new out -- we've had so many "diets" and attempt fail us before.  When we stall, it brings up those old feelings and fears that this time will be another failure.  It takes a lot of faith to believe this time is different.

Then steps in a nut that says something like that to you. UGH.  Let me ask you to consider this:  most nuts really have no idea what it is like to have been obese or how things work for a non-typical weighted body.  I may get some flak for this statement -- but that has been my experience.  Indeed, very few of them have much more knowledge than what is typical and mainstream education in "healthy eating."

You are definitely not a freak.  You are a person, like me and countless others here, who have suffered the disease of obesity and are winning the battle against it.  It's a hard fight -- and you need to make sure that you have people behind you that give you strength for battle rather than blaming you for the war.  My advice, take what you need from that group and leave the rest behind.  

You had every right to be pissed off.  

Keep up the good fight.  Oh, and by the way, I lose in a "stair step" pattern, too.  In fact, I do not lose anything in the two weeks after my period and then drop quite a bit in the week and a half before it starts.  A lot of us lose that way and it is perfectly normal for us.  

At 2 months out I'm reminding myself daily that this is going to be at least a 12 to 18 month process to lose the weight after the surgery. So in the long run if I don't lose for 2-4 weeks but I do lose over that time that's not horrible...that's what I'm telling myself and I know it's true and reminding myself that I will lose more.

I do have people behind me that give me strength. I have a wonderful husband that used to enable me by buying me treats when I was sad or happy or just because but now realizes that would be sabotage and instead encourages me completely and has given up pop himself and moved the things that truly tempt me to places I know nothing about lol. I have a best friend that tells me I can complain about any part of this process to her and she won't judge - and I do and she doesn't judge. Plus I have this group which has given me so much good advice in 8 weeks!! And encouragement when I was really, really down.

And thanks for the good head on my shoulders comment :)  Let's hope I do lose the weight and maintain it, nothing would make me happier! 

I applaud you for going to support group and I'm sorry that you ended up put on the spot like that. I am proud of you for staying away from the carbs your nutritionist and this other are pushing. Stick to your guns and I can guarantee you will lose the weight and,even more importantly,keep it off. My surgeon has a dietitian not a nutritionist with his practice. They have more extensive education and she says stay away from bread,rice,pasta and white potatoes. So I have and lost the weight and maintained now for two years. If I were you I would continue to go to support group for the relationships you will form with other newbies and vets but take what you hear with a grain of salt. You will still learn some things that will be helpful. And I too lost in spurts as I think most people do. You are doing nothing wrong! Make sure to measure too as often when the scale is stuck the inches are falling off. You are doing just fine so keep it up!

when dealing with "educated morons" I just learned to node, smile, say "wow , that is a different approach; interesting" ...and then walk away and not look back...

you have gotten good advice and also believe you are right to disregRd what the NUTs are saying. 

I seldom talk about myself on groups. That is the only way I have found to avoid potentially seeing myself in a "spotlight" that is what I would suggest for you as well. Listen,use what you can and trash the rest.

I had my RNY 6.75 years ago. The last time I saw a NUT was the day after my surgery with instructions on my diet progression. I have not seen one since and somehow managed to lose 200 pounds and keep it off.

A NUT is not necessary for long-term success.