Another issue I would like you to consider, and just start mulling around, is: "What are you going to do if your hubby is a food pusher?"

Some of us get "scarily skinny" between years 1-3.  The body later figures out how to suck every stupid calorie out of what went in your mouth and the weight will generally creep back on. But until that happens, you may be "scarily skinny" for awhile.

My surgeon's office told me to lose as much as possible and that my body would just inherently stop when it found the right place. And to this date, it has. I bounce between 139-142 lbs 1.4 years post op. I would LIKE to get thinner (I want a buffer zone!) but the body aint cooperating.

Anyhow, the reason I bring this up, is I now have food pushers around me and they are rather in my face. The first is my Mom who calls me "Hatchet Face" which means my face looks too gaunt.

I have an ex-boyfriend, who told me when I was MO that he had standards and he would NEVER marry me because he wants a wife that he could "Pick up."   This guy now freaks out that I have no boobs (they went from DD to A cup) and BEGS me to eat when we go out as a group to dinner.  I get the kids meal (generally chicken and veg and eat half..and i am happy). He doesnt know what I did but every time I see him or talk to him, he asks "Have you started eating again? Dont you think this is getting a little bit out of control?"

My husband just asks "Are you happy?  Are you healthy?" and he encourages my newly recovered fitness hobbies like skating. He doesnt run or skate himself, but he likes to remind me when my lesson sessions are ending and reminds me that we can "swing it financially" if I want to sign up for another block.

There is a difference between the ex-bf and the hubby. It is startling.

But my mom, I would have never expected such a reaction out of her. She always wanted me to be thin and like it was the only thing that mattered. Or that it mattered MORE than my other academic and professional accomplishments.  I knew she was a "goal post mover"  but I didnt realize HOW upset I would be to hear her be upset that I am thin. She thinks I should be 120 but complains I am too thin. I told her that I am 139 and she said "No you arent."

So just be aware, in your journey, there may be food pushers and a lot of negative feedback from the most surprising of sources. Please start thinking about how you are going to handle those people WHEN they happen.

Yep.  I am of Italian descent and so is hubby. We descend from a long line of mangia-mangia-have-a-second-helping peoples! My hubby is naturally very thin and small; he struggles to keep weight on, or at least he did until recently. But anyway, a thin guy who can eat pretty much as much as wants.  Oh the irony.

To his credit, he has learned a good amount about morbid obesity and about my surgery over the past few months. He knows my servings will be freakishly small at first, and small for life.  We are both amused by this concept; I was a, shall we say, enthusiastic eater pre-surgery! I don't want him to freak out about my portion sizes when I start to eat again, and thankfully he's committed to learning. it will be a learning experience for both of us. 

I am grateful that my marriage is a strong one and has been actually made stronger by this surgery process. He's a good partner to me and I feel I can count on his support.  Sounds like yours is too, SS. 

to the OP - focus on the support you DO have from the rest of your family.  And thank goodness for that!  And, you have this community on OH. Keep offering to address your SO's fears or concerns, but above all just focus on your goal. He may come around - don't give up, but please put yourself first here.  

Wow, that is shocking to me about your Mom calling you hatchet face and not being supportive when she wanted you skinny previously! (Also about your boobs, that's a fear of mine lol)

I'm very glad to hear your husband is supportive. I feel that everyone deserves that kind of support. I have that kind of support and I think I will continue to get that from mine. He was amazing through cancer - and that's another thing people go through and is common to get divorced during. So I feel like I know what kind of man he is but sometimes I worry that I keep throwing TOO much at him.

But I have started thinking about how to handle those kind of people if the negative feedback happens. Not that I'm anywhere close to being too skinny since I just started lol.

You will be there fore you know it!  A year goes by quickly.

While it did happen to me, I had a friend who had gastric bypass and lost so fast, she didn't recognize herself in the mirror or pictures!

The closest I have come is: I don't recognize my clothes.   I continually gravitate to 12s instead of 2s.  I remember when all I wanted to be was a 12!  Getting to a 2 is totally mind blowing!